The holidays are quickly approaching. You need to start shopping for presents if you haven’t already. It’s also time to pick out this year’s holiday cards. Skip the drugstore and Hallmark because we rounded up the best holiday cards out there. From expletives and celebrities, to memes and middle fingers, these are the 8 holiday cards you’ll actually want to send this year. Pair one with a solid gift and you’re golden.
Finch & Hare Santa Hates You Card
On the surface, Finch & Hare’s Santa Hates You card might seem a little over the top (even if it’s true), but the inside reveals everyone’s favorite belly busting present giver’s true feelings. “Santa has some favorites & one is you.” It’s funny. It’s cute. Unlike other cards on this list, it also packs a positive message that you get to unfold without having to explain. $5
Tiny Bee Cards Doge Holiday Card
Such Christmas. Much Jolly. Wow. Very Gifts. Wow. So Merry. Such Holiday. At the end of the day, can you really go wrong with funny holiday cards that reference one of the oldest memes out there? The Internet loves the Doge and so will all of your friends. $5
Turtle’s Soup St. Nic Christmas Card
Saint Nicholas—aka Nikolaos of Myra, Christian saint and Greek Bishop of Myra; aka Nikolaos the Wonderworker; aka the patron saint of sailors, merchants, archers, repentant thieves, children, brewers, pawnbrokers and students—was the original model for Santa Claus. This St. Nic is more of the Cage variety, but that doesn’t mean this isn’t the perfect card for that special someone on your list. $5
Top Hat and Monocle Make Christmas Great Again Card
We have no idea if Top Hat and Monocle created their Let’s Make Christmas Great Again card for serious or hilarious purposes, but we don’t care. While we absolutely refuse to weigh in on anything political, there’s at least one person on your Christmas card list that would enjoy this card for one reason or another. $5
Calligraphuck Holiday Cards
As you might have guessed, Calligraphuck made a name for themselves by stylishly emblazoning expletives into traditional calligraphy. The Happy Fucking Holidays card is printed in the UK by Blush Publishing with metallic gold ink on 100% cotton stock and folded into an A6 size. When your happy holidays cards audience requires just a little more vulgarity, this is the card for you. $5
Melissa Rachel Black Does This Fulfill My Christmas Card Obligation Card
Melissa Rachel Black has a card with a storied holiday figure flipping the bird (spoiler alert: it’s a snowman), but this list wouldn’t be filled with truly unique holiday cards if every one was a lovable character giving your intended recipient the finger. In light of that, we’re going with the Does This Fulfill My Christmas Card Obligation Card because it’s still hilariously illustrated and gets right to the point. $5
Seas and Peas Mike Tyson Merry Chrithmith Card
If there’s a better way to wish someone a Merry Christmas than Mike Tyson’s mug and a perfectly lisp-y Merry Christmith, we don’t know what it is. This is obviously not a card you’d want to send to Grandma for the holidays, but it’s definitely one that will be appreciated by friends (maybe some family if you’re lucky). $4
Terrapin Stationers x N’East Style Fuck Yeah Santa! Card
Nothing says Merry Christmas! quite like a perfectly illustrated, superior print of Santa Claus flipping the bird just waiting to be released from its festive red envelope. The original illustration by menswear phenom Christine Mitchell (aka N’East Style) is engraved in gold on an A7 folded card by the one-and-only Terrapin Stationers. Fuck Yeah Santa! is the holiday card you give to someone truly special. $12
