If there’s one thing we always wished existed for real from our childhood it’s the cars from Twisted Metal. Something about driving around in a car with a gun mounted to it just appeals to our more sensible side. Audi did it with paintball guns, and that’s probably as close as we’re going to get… until the apocalypse comes for real because we all know that shit’s going to happen eventually.

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Ah, the waffle weave. Looks cool, feels great, reminds us of toasted Eggos. You’ve seen them before–probably in a fancy store or hotel–but Parachute’s brand new Waffle Towels are different. They’re spun using innovative Aerocotton Technology, which basically means they’ll be dry by the time your significant other finally gets out of the shower and realizes you stole their towel. Parachute’s Waffle Towels come in two sizes and two neutral colors. Plus, their 100% cotton construction means they start soft and only get softer with time. Even Kevin McCallister would approve.