Ron-F-ing-Swanson-BBQ-Sauce

Besides bucket loads of bacon and eggs, there’s something else Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman on Parks and Recreation if you weren’t aware) has a passion for: Straight up beef. It’s why the man hits a strip club buffet. Now, with Ron F***ing Swanson BBQ Sauce, you can slather your meat (hold the laughter) in something approved by the manliest of men. It’s a thick and rich sauce for your ribs, steaks or any animal that you happened to kill with your bare hands. For added deliciousness, lick your mustache after eating and proceed to whittle yourself a new wooden bib.

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Your morning routine is begging for Parachute’s towels. What makes them different? Well, Parachute uses an innovative process called Aerocotton Technology, which blows air through the cotton fibers as they’re spun. That means extra fluffy towels that dry quickly. Plus, the towels are made exclusively from premium long-staple Egyptian cotton, which is the best around. Soft, absorbent, and quick-drying—Parachute’s towels offer everything you want. Your new favorite part of a long, hot shower? Drying off.