Double Barreled Marshmallow Crossbow | Cool Material
Double Barreled Marshmallow Crossbow

Double Barreled Marshmallow Crossbow

Hold on to your hats cubicle dwellers, office warfare just took a turn for the awesome. Even though the release of what is sure to become known as the office BFG won’t get recorded in any history books, it isn’t any less important to your daily grind. Why? Because nothing says take those TPS reports and cram them up your ass like a thirty foot range and fifty marshmallows flying through the air. Pull back the plunger, release, repeat. In the event of a jammed bullet or an explosion in the chamber, the magazines are dishwasher safe. In the world of non-lethal warfare, what’s more fun than two barrels of arm powered, potentially gooey, white goodness? Absolutely nothing, so lock and load.

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You wear underwear. You’re probably doing it right now. So if you’re wearing underwear anyway, try MeUndies. Their underwear is made from an exceptionally breathable fabric they get from Beechwood trees in the Austrian Alps. Bonus thing, the fabric inhibits bacterial growth in your sensitive space, which is the most positive thing ever said. It’s really soft too. You don’t need science to prove that, just skin you can rub the fabric on. They come in black. Attractive people wear black. They come in a 3-pack “Classic Collection,” which saves money. Financially savvy people save money.  Be an attractive, financially savvy person.

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