Arctic Portable Blue Laser

The product description on webpage reads fairly normally at first:  the laser emits a 445nm blue, high power 1W beam which appears up to 4000% brighter than other lasers.  Pretty cool, and pretty standard.  Then, right down at the bottom, they lay this out–“Saying this laser is extremely dangerous is an understatement.  It will blind instantly and permanently, and set fire to skin and other body parts.”  Did you just say “holy shit” under your breath?  Yeah, us too.

Parachute-CM-IF2-11-13-17

Ah, the waffle weave. Looks cool, feels great, reminds us of toasted Eggos. You’ve seen them before–probably in a fancy store or hotel–but Parachute’s brand new Waffle Towels are different. They’re spun using innovative Aerocotton Technology, which basically means they’ll be dry by the time your significant other finally gets out of the shower and realizes you stole their towel. Parachute’s Waffle Towels come in two sizes and two neutral colors. Plus, their 100% cotton construction means they start soft and only get softer with time. Even Kevin McCallister would approve.