Posted by IonOtter on August 15th, 2010 at 10:38 am
@Jerry BUTTHURT BAAAWWWWW!! Should we call you the WHAAAAAmbulance?
Posted by BUCK on August 15th, 2010 at 11:54 am
i hated it to end… it’d make a fun book
Posted by Jad on August 15th, 2010 at 1:18 pm
Nice sense of Humour Jerry. Go worship someone in your little corner, little slave.
Posted by Nextasy on August 15th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
Jerry, go in your room!!!
Posted by Jerry on August 15th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
This was funny until you got to the God part. Totally not funny anymore. Make fun of things that people don’t worship. you ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
Posted by Naz on August 15th, 2010 at 6:43 pm
Awesome status updates, haha. I want moar!!!
Posted by Sims on August 16th, 2010 at 2:57 am
right there with jerry on this…poor taste in humour wen u need to be offensive.
Posted by HarryLime on August 16th, 2010 at 4:52 am
Jerry was kinda right for the wrong reasons. The “creation” (copyright Judeo-Christain 3600 Bc) is mythical, not historical. Although you could do a whole mythical status update meme.
Thor … hammer time!
Loki … no fair, you get all the cool stuff, I get a rabid wolf, bastard keeps biting me.
Odin likes this
Buddha is.
Ryleh …. who the fuck friended Cthulu?
Jesus, God, and Holy Spirit are attending Day of Judgement. Are you Quick or Dead (click one).
Posted by Human on August 16th, 2010 at 6:23 am
Very funny! But dont joke about God, it`s unrespectable to religious people
Posted by Matthew on August 16th, 2010 at 10:37 am
Unrespectable? You mean disrespectful?
If your religion is true and practiced correctly, you would not mention your petty grievances over anothers opinions. Those who are easily offended will be easily offended by anything.
Posted by Jonny5 on August 16th, 2010 at 11:15 am
Some people crack me up, “Oh no, a joke about god, that’s absolutely terrible!” Yet not one person said anything about the Columbia Space Shuttle. This article is funny from start to finish, F people’s reservations about religion.
Posted by Brian on August 16th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
As someone who is considering history as a major, this is awesome.
I loved the God jokes, it’s not really appropriate but sometimes the inappropriate jokes make for the best ones. Well done, whoever did this.
Posted by Rob on August 16th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
Yeah, funny how people got upset about the reference to God, but not about the 7 people that died on Columbia. Their families are still living with that you know?
The idea of the God joke was that God created the world. So, there would be no-one to comment on his status you see? No-one! That’s the joke! It’s not offensive! But then, religious people are not famous for their sense of humour.
Posted by Sam on August 16th, 2010 at 6:06 pm
DUDE. its all a joke. all you Jesus lovers stop ruining all the shit
What? you can talk about other religions and make jokes about other cultures but when it comes to YOUR God.. its off limits? Give me a fucking break man.
oohh SNAPS I CANT BELIEVE HOW GENIOUSLY FUNNY THAT WAS!!!! LMFBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Catpacino on August 16th, 2010 at 7:36 pm
I want MORE. This was the funniest thing I have seen in ages. I’m off my chair killing myself laughing…tears streaming down my face….OMG!
PS…please have a sense of humor fellows. I’m sure the invisible man up in the sky will laugh too.
Posted by waddizzle on August 16th, 2010 at 8:25 pm
I’m gonna call bull here – religious jokes are funny, so are black jokes, and gay jokes, and white people jokes, and jewish jokes – all funny (well not all of them are funny but its not because of the subject matter). If you can’t laugh at yourself then it is my most sincere hope that god made you sterile so you genes can be edited out of the pool…. @jerry – get over yourself
Posted by Zsuzsanna on August 16th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
The ONLY one I thought iffy on the acceptable/humorous scale was the Columbia one. The rest, including the god and church ones were freaking hilarious. I almost missed the Newton one at the end! LOL
Posted by A B on August 16th, 2010 at 10:02 pm
Columbia- inappropriate. The rest – hilarious. Uber-Christians need to get a sense of humor. (Be careful, extremism has to start somewhere…)
Posted by christina on August 17th, 2010 at 12:37 am
this is funny!..dont think any of it was to be offensive to anyone! just to get you to smile or laugh..this was very creative, and i loved it!..WWJD..he would smile & laugh!! geesh ppl, get a grip
Posted by Morgan on August 17th, 2010 at 2:17 am
@harrylime: awesome!
the main reason religious people get upset about jokes made about their religion is that they are afraid their fairy stories can’t withstand the power of ridicule. and they are right.
Posted by Caratacus on August 17th, 2010 at 2:20 am
That was a scream, the religous fogeys need to back off and get a sense of humour.Their God is not untouchable after all he let 6 million of his chosen race down pretty recently.
Posted by yeshua on August 17th, 2010 at 3:14 am
“But dont joke about God…”
“This was funny until you got to the God part. Totally not funny anymore.”
You guys have looked in a mirror, right? If you believe in monotheism, you’ll hopefully (eventually) find the humor in the fact that a deity with nothing better to do, creates goofy fuckups like humans to go scrambling about in his/her own personal little “ant” farm kicking the crap out of each other and stealing all the good stuff from their neighbors and all other species co-existing on this planet…what other religion/spirituality could there ever be but laughter in a world like this?
Posted by Rory on August 17th, 2010 at 5:22 am
The “Titantic” portion was kind of a dud. =/
But the God portion absolutely cracked me up. Jesus: “Don’t worry Dad, I got this.” Hahaha! Come on. That’s not -making fun- of Christianity. That’s something a Christian would joke about Jesus saying during a conversation between him and God. Lighten up! My father’s a retired pastor and he bought a pin that read: “Don’t make me come down there.” — God.
Where do you think humor CAME from? Don’t you think God has a sense of humor? Look at the platypus, for Heaven’s sake! Or baboons. =D And the cute little things that baby animals and humans do. Laughter is God’s gift. Use it!
Posted by Semster on August 17th, 2010 at 7:24 am
Common people. This is about humor! And even religion can be the subject, or else you are taking life way too serious, if you know what i mean.
Posted by sr. on August 17th, 2010 at 8:57 am
i don’t know how many of you recall the challenger… was in fourth grade… it was three days before i heard the joke what does nasa stand for… need another seven astronauts.. jokes are our attempt to make good from bad in most cases… personally, i feel that a good “ribbing” at god and nasa isn’t a bad thing… we all need a break from taking it too serious…
Posted by M E on August 17th, 2010 at 9:00 am
Agree with most folks… God and others were funny! Columbia one was thumbs down.
Posted by SimAlex on August 17th, 2010 at 12:02 pm
someone bring jerry a box of tissues so he can cry himself to sleep about his poor offended God. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
Posted by Jan on August 17th, 2010 at 1:49 pm
As a christian, I found the “God” one especially funny! The Colombia one less so, but that’s just a personal preference. I’d love to see a whole book!
Posted by rae on August 17th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
OH COME ON!… grow a sense of humour. If you go around in life so serious you’re going to be sorely disappointed with what you find out there.
I am a catholic church goer and i loved it!
Posted by Omar on August 17th, 2010 at 6:00 pm
Very funny, especially Newton’s part.
Nevertheless, as Jerry said, you should not have brought God into this. You wouldn’t like God making fun of you after you die now, would you? Even if you don’t believe you’re going to Him again, are you willing to take the risk … ?
Repent!
Posted by George on August 17th, 2010 at 8:46 pm
It’s especially funny cause God isn’t real!
Posted by Zenki on August 17th, 2010 at 9:30 pm
Wow, you people offended by God being there need to get your panties out of a bunch. I’m Christian and I found the God part hilarious. They weren’t making fun of anything, they were just poking fun at historical figures and events. It’s not the same as MAKING fun of someone. If it implied he didn’t exist, then yes, it has no place there, but it was just stating the point of views of Christians. If God doesn’t belong there then neither does Darwin but I don’t see the evolutionists throwing a bitchfit on here.
Posted by cooey on August 17th, 2010 at 9:32 pm
well if then is so forth of ernt
Posted by Michael on August 17th, 2010 at 11:39 pm
As a (very odd) Christian myself, there’s nothing offensive about the God stuff.
Posted by keitha on August 18th, 2010 at 12:53 am
Vewy funny. Especially the God stuff. God’s either imaginary or omnipotent. Either way, God’s way too powerful to care if we make fun of it. Do we care if ants make fun of us?
And I’d say “Good Call” to Rob about nobody being there to comment on God’s creating the world, and yet it’s all unexplained where the women came from who married Cain and Abel. Surely they didn’t marry their sisters!! But if Adam & Eve were the only other people on the planet, where did their waives come from? Hmmmmm? Guess there must have been someone on earth to comment after all.
Posted by Uchiha Itachi on August 18th, 2010 at 2:47 am
epic nice!
Posted by DanielCtw on August 18th, 2010 at 5:07 am
Definitely cool stuffs. Nice
Posted by Aj on August 18th, 2010 at 5:12 am
@George agreed sir! These jokes are funny! Maybe some of you just need to get laid. I know if i wasnt gettin any, I would get all grumpy about dumb shit too. Hell, just rub one out and your sense of humor goes up like 5 points! haha
Posted by Tom on August 18th, 2010 at 5:43 am
It’s funny, how satire tends to be misread…seriously what part of the religious stuff was not something that you would hear in Sunday School as a kid.
And the Darwin Galileo stuff is a pretty good simplification of historical events.
Posted by Dave on August 18th, 2010 at 6:19 am
Hilarious. I’m talking about these comments. hahaha. The FB statuses are brilliant too. God would be looking down laughing his face off at the pompous self-righteous ones right now.
Posted by mosze on August 18th, 2010 at 6:59 am
this is ‘hilarious’, no srsly, like the ‘freshest’ Facebook joke out there, maybe it’s not the first, but it still is something…
the funniest part is how some ppl get offended by jokes about their favourite science-fiction characters
Posted by Μαύρος Γάτος on August 18th, 2010 at 11:00 am
Brilliant!!!!
If we should refrain from joking with “what people worship”, then we should refrain from joking-period.
So no, we are not obliged to stand with owe before anybody’s obcessions, Jerry.
Posted by Moony on August 18th, 2010 at 12:36 pm
I find it amusing that taking digs at Christianity is acceptable, but I wonder how people might feel if it were Islam as the butt of the jokes. Funny how it’s not up there, now isn’t it?
Posted by the devilscandy on August 18th, 2010 at 1:41 pm
I befriended Cthulhu. The Pseudonomicon told me too.
Posted by Mycoal on August 18th, 2010 at 2:34 pm
“It was funny until the god part”
you’re okay with mocking dead astronauts, but GOD?!?!?!? oh no, no, please, fire all over my body!!!!!!!!
Posted by ThatDarnCat on August 18th, 2010 at 2:51 pm
Imagine what kind of whining would have been here if there was an Obama joke.
Posted by neoritter on August 18th, 2010 at 3:05 pm
Most of those were funny except the Galileo and Charles Darwin statuses. Should really try to be more historically accurate…
Also, instead of cockroach at the end of the meteor status, probably should’ve been a rat, a mouse, or some small rodent.
HELLO PEOPLE, ITS A JOKE!!!! GET OVER IT!!! ITS ALL HILARIOUS!!!
Posted by nickdagreek on August 18th, 2010 at 3:33 pm
politics…religion…always gonna be a doozy. Each to their own I guess. I thought everything was BRILLLL and far from crass…And I am the king of crass…wanna hear a dead baby joke?
Posted by Scoot on August 18th, 2010 at 3:35 pm
God has a sense of humor
God- Abraham, you will have a son
Abraham – Yeah right. I am old God. LOL at God.
Abraham has a son. God tells him to name his son Isaac which means, laughter, or to laugh.
Posted by Norma on August 18th, 2010 at 3:46 pm
I thought it was funny…and I really don’t think its disrespectful at all.
Posted by pegolasgreenleaf on August 18th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Could have done without the Space Shuttle one.
Posted by ashmizen on August 18th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
Allah is God, I think, its one and the same, according to Islam. They just believe that Mohammad was the best/final prophet, or something like that. So really, you’ve got all three religions, judaism, christianity, islam covered by this joke.
Posted by Soos on August 18th, 2010 at 5:59 pm
@monny there was no mention of ne specific religion. there was mentioning of the church, unless u agree that the world is flat then thats another issue. ur an ignorant tard, do u even KNOW that the story of Adam and Eve EXISTS in the Quraan? so we can say that Islam and Judiasm were also the butt of some jokes. how bout u read a book, u might learn smthn.
Posted by John on August 18th, 2010 at 6:06 pm
You guys believe in god, huh. Grow up and think for yourselves.
Posted by Annon on August 18th, 2010 at 6:09 pm
Muslims also believe in God and they also believe that Jesus is a prophet so this would be offensive to any religious body that believes in God and Jesus, there is no need to start a battle of religions here just enjoy the frickin joke
Posted by joe on August 18th, 2010 at 6:23 pm
why does everything always turn into an argument about (to do with) religion? it was quite interesting scrolling down the list of comments and watching the ripples spread…..nice job, jerry. you should’ve been in the butterfly effect.
Posted by Joe on August 18th, 2010 at 6:28 pm
Come on. The God stuff is not disrespectful. Funny is funny. I don’t think it’s saying anything offensive anyway. God created humor too.. so lighten up. Now, I’ll add my vote that that the Columbia bit is going a little far. I know it’s been a few years, but still as they say in comedy “too soon”. I’m going to guess the author knew to self edit any “posts” from the twin towers, this isn’t a lot different.
Posted by Justy on August 18th, 2010 at 7:05 pm
As a Christian I didn’t find any of those jokes about God offensive. But the one about Columbia was kinda mean and quite disrespectful. Otherwise, that was the best 5 mins of my day
Posted by Justy on August 18th, 2010 at 7:09 pm
@Moony FYI there are plenty of jokes about terrorists and stuff like that. Have you ever seen Achmed the Dead Terrorist? Extremely funny stuff. Christianity is not the butt of jokes all the time. Stop getting your panties in a wad and move on.
For all those who think that was fun… Go get a life!! Cuz after that.. U’ll be punished for sure!! I didnt find it funny.. That was pathetic…
Ask for God’s forgivness now!
Posted by Wiggidy on August 18th, 2010 at 8:22 pm
@Moony:
Muhammad status update: WTF? I just saw this dude who said he was the Angel Gabrielle
Gabrielle: Read bitch!
Muhammad: I can’t read!
Aisha (Muhammad’s wife): sucks thumb (she’s only 6 years old)
Posted by Jebus on August 18th, 2010 at 8:53 pm
Say what?
Posted by Mary on August 18th, 2010 at 8:53 pm
I don’t see how the God part is offensive at all. It’s not making fun at all. It’s just putting humor into it. And I do believe that God likes humor….sorry, but I don’t think he wants us to be sulking around Earth for our lives having no fun. People are too sensitive these days, lighten up!!!
Posted by Ammar on August 18th, 2010 at 9:03 pm
Wow it’s amazing how everyone is attacking Jerry He just expressed what he felt… Why is that a wrong thing… Just like laughter getting offended is an emotion and one should be entitled to that… Free speech, the ppl who fight for it contradict it the most
Posted by AP on August 18th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
GTFO our internet Jerry. I would have shared this on Facebook if your fucked up comment wasn’t the default text.
Posted by questlogic on August 18th, 2010 at 9:52 pm
omg, the only thing funnier then the facebook thread is the comment war that followed. clap clap clap. I think I peed myself.
Posted by Oh the Irony on August 19th, 2010 at 5:32 am
I find it painfully ironic when a person A tells a person B to leave a person C alone (when person B disagrees with a comment made by person C and attacks them back in comment) on the grounds that they are restricting a persons right to freedom of speech by verbally abusing them..
This was hilarious. Loved John Hancock’s pic of Lenny Kravitz lol
Posted by Krissy D on August 19th, 2010 at 11:02 am
This was the funniest thing ever! I love God’s posts, and that John Hancock’s picture was of Will Smith as Hancock… and the responses from “The Church”…. amazing!
Posted by Krissy D on August 19th, 2010 at 11:08 am
Did anyone else find themselves clicking “older posts” hoping to get more? lol
Posted by Yena on August 19th, 2010 at 1:38 pm
LMFAO!! i laughed so hard I hit my head on my key board!!! and had tears falling out of my eyes! GREATTTTT JoB
Posted by Dee on August 19th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
Just when I was feeling admiration for all the religious people for not getting upset about the “church resists science” updates, somebody has to whine about that!
Come on, people, even the Catholic Church has changed their policy and acknowleged that the earth orbits the sun!
All you angry Christians out there, can’t you practice your own religion and *leave the judgement to God*?
If some of us get a laugh at the expense of religion, it really is for God to decide whether he’s offended (or agrees, or thinks the whole lot of us maned apes could use some culling…”I said be fruitful and multiply – not swarm over the earth and overwhelm it with your numbers – sheesh!”)
Posted by Sarah on August 19th, 2010 at 2:46 pm
This. Was. AWESOME. Whoever said John Hancock’s pic was the best rules, because that was hilarious.
Also, @Jerry – Some people worship cows and believe that they’re sacred. When was the last time you ate beef?
Posted by cory lee on August 19th, 2010 at 2:49 pm
ya i clicked on “older posts” to it dont work hopfully there will be more. the titanic rules
Posted by 21stcn on August 19th, 2010 at 3:12 pm
I’m going to say this very slowly… if you think it’s ‘too soon’ to joke about the Challenger, you’re a douche. If you think that might have offended God, you’re a douche. If you were offended by the God jokes, you’re a douche.
PS: God doesn’t exist – time to grow up
Posted by Dude on August 19th, 2010 at 3:29 pm
The God part was awesome xD Some others were pretty good toO!
Posted by Michelle on August 19th, 2010 at 3:47 pm
@ Krissy D.: I absolutely clicked “older posts” hoping for more! LOL
@ Angela: Laughing right along with you!
Posted by jb in ATL on August 19th, 2010 at 3:48 pm
As a lifelong Christian, I found the God jokes especially funny. Follow the logic here – God created man in his own image (human behavior is based on the behavior of God), therefore, God has a whack sense of humor, as you need to be a little twisted to survive in this world.
(OK, I know that logic stream is a little non-sequitor. Bite me. It’s still valid.)
If that isn’t enough evidence for you, if you really don’t think God has a sense of humor, just look at the people around you….or look in the mirror. It’s all good!
Posted by Tiffany on August 19th, 2010 at 4:30 pm
Look I’m gonna say the whole thing was funny as hell. I belong to “The Church” and even I laughed. Don’t be such Debbie Downer and stop getting offended at the slightest things. Take things with a grain of salt. It was meant to be funny. The
Secondly
I haven’t read the comments so someone may have pointed this out before..
Isn’t there a mistake here?
If the post was 344 years ago, shouldn’t the comments be be as old?
How come the apple fell 344 years ago and the follow up comment is 25 minutes ago..?
Would’ve been cool if u had Prophet Muhammad there with no photo.. just speech…
Posted by Sarah on August 19th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
So people are upset about the god status, others are upset about the space shuttle, but it’s okay to laugh about all those that died on the titanic? Get over it, they are funny and are meant to be light hearted relax! I bet those who are pissed are still mad at their parents fir lying to them about Santa, egregious!
Posted by Craig W on August 19th, 2010 at 6:49 pm
Very well done! Sitting patiently for part 2
Posted by biteitinthe on August 19th, 2010 at 7:30 pm
YES ^^^
Everything Made Me Smile/Laugh.
everyone’s so up the butt about things nowadays..
jesus christ -________-
Posted by Jennifer Coronado on August 19th, 2010 at 8:56 pm
IT’S A SHAME THAT WHEN YOU POST THIS LINK ON ANYTHING, IT SHOWS THE STUPID COMMENT BY JERRY UP THERE AS A BYLINE. RUINS THE WHOLE THING. MAKES THE LINK LOOK LIKE A LINK TO A PAGE WHERE YOU ARE HATING ON IT INSTEAD OF SHARING A LAUGH…
Posted by Maxwell Waters on August 19th, 2010 at 9:47 pm
Even as a devout Roman Catholic, I found the “God” part funny. Not accurate, nor reflecting my beliefs? Certainly. But funny anyway. Made me laugh So chill out people. They made fun of the Church — i.e. my church — too, and a lot of that was true, which just made me laugh harder.The authors probably don’t really think that God had the hots for Eve; it was supposed to be funny, and it was. Relax.
Posted by Toolbags on August 19th, 2010 at 11:38 pm
Lets play spot the Ignorant Yanks……
They’d be the ones who have a problem with 7 people dying on columbia but FAIL to mention/dont have an issue with the 1500 odd people who froze to death/drowned when the titanic sank.
Posted by Alex on August 20th, 2010 at 12:21 am
GOD – GUYS DON’T JOKE ABOUT GOD NOT COOL OMG
COLUMBIA SPACE SHUTTLE – HAHAHA THE DEATH OF THE INNOCENT IS HILARIOUS, I SEE NO PROBLEM WITH THIS
LOL YOU GUYS
Posted by Hazique on August 20th, 2010 at 12:59 am
It’s not funny to make fun of anything. Even though we shared a good laugh, still…
Those who don’t respect don’t deserve to be respected. It’s fact.
Posted by rakesh s on August 20th, 2010 at 2:25 am
Awesome!!!
Posted by Akash on August 20th, 2010 at 2:27 am
Mannn….them boys got the bttr of the Church….Galileo & Darwin…u guys rockkkk…
Posted by Filip on August 20th, 2010 at 2:37 am
It’s also a shame that Jennifer is retarded and doesn’t know how to type.
Also inte the retarded family: That Jerry guy and his ancient book.
Posted by Rebstarr on August 20th, 2010 at 2:38 am
Made a suicidal woman laugh again.
Posted by iHAVEasenseofhumour on August 20th, 2010 at 2:42 am
In WHAT WAY is this god stuff offensive????? Seriously?
If you are Christian, then it doesn’t actually say ANYTHING contrary to the bible???
WTF??? Stop being so silly and stupid!!! Or is just because God is mentioned that you find it offensive???? How is saying that God created the earth, then “let there be light”, then adam, then eve… er… isnt that straight out of the bible?????????? and “original sin” er… thats a Christian concept… for F#$*-sake GROW UP!!!
WOAH man, all of it is a joke, people need to really loosen up a bit.. lol this was fantastic.
Posted by Peter on August 20th, 2010 at 5:24 am
My God has a sense of humour. Thank God.
Posted by jj on August 20th, 2010 at 9:31 am
hilarious! do more!!!!!
Posted by Abbey on August 20th, 2010 at 9:31 am
The post about god isn’t disrespectful… it doesn’t portray god or the creation story in a negative light, nor does the joke ridicule god or the bible or Christianity in general. The joke itself is simply a modernized retelling of the creation story, and I cannot see how that would be offensive.
In the same way, the Columbia bit (people commenting about the Challenger- that accident happened in either the ’70s or the ’80s, the incident in question is the more recent one involving Columbia) is not disrespectful because it does not ridicule or negatively portray the astronauts. However, it is very distasteful, the same as joking about any other tragedy recent enough to be remembered. Is it clever? Yes. Is it funny? I suppose. But I still cringed instead of laughing when I read it. Sorry, but I still remember crying the day it happened… I don’t think I’ll ever find a joke about it truly funny.
Posted by Sucktackular on August 20th, 2010 at 9:45 am
Not-funny fake shits are not funny.
Posted by John on August 20th, 2010 at 9:47 am
You guys need to get over the religious offensive BS. You can’t provide any evidence, and neither can your so-called all powerful god, of his existence. You’re only offended because beliefs rely completely on emotion. Well…your emotions mean little to me when you still believe in fairy tales with absolutely nothing to back up their validity.
Anyway…great entertainment here. Loved the asteroid one.
Posted by Colin on August 20th, 2010 at 10:07 am
Please don’t make fun of gOD it’s unrespectful to our religiousness.
Posted by Lapadapa on August 20th, 2010 at 10:11 am
AH! Hahahahahhaha! Oh god… I almost peed! This is great. More please!
Posted by Kelly on August 20th, 2010 at 10:24 am
THIS WAS AWESOME!!!! I am a christian and I am not afraid to laugh. God created our sense of humor and we are in his image. If you don’t think God has a sense of humor, then life must be so sad for you. Who knows, today might be YOUR day to amuse him.
Posted by RKMK on August 20th, 2010 at 11:56 am
It’s “Caesar.” Like the SALAD. You’re on the internet – Google it, for fuck’s sakes.
Posted by Cyntia Bravo on August 20th, 2010 at 12:15 pm
It’s all about creativity! Amazing!!! The best part was: “God could do better”. Just like the bible!!!
Posted by TLH on August 20th, 2010 at 12:22 pm
Oh come on folks, do people think that God doesn’t know what funny is? Sure he does! He invented humor! He also invented the platypus and the giraffe, two pretty funny looking critters if you ask me!
Posted by Twinkie on August 20th, 2010 at 12:31 pm
“Cockroach: Whatevs.” LOL! Make more!
Posted by Dee on August 20th, 2010 at 1:06 pm
For those of you who don’t know;
the “too soon” rule in comedy (guideline, not law) is that we don’t joke publicly about victims of murder or tragic accident until after everyone who knew them personally and loved them has died, so…
Julius Caesar: OK
Abraham Lincoln: OK
Titanic:OK
Challenger: too soon
Sept 11 attacks: too soon – and so on.
(unless it’s really funny)
Posted by bret wagner on August 20th, 2010 at 1:18 pm
This stupid religious argument ruined a thread that should be about this Awesome post. Off topic and annoying
Posted by Boris on August 20th, 2010 at 1:27 pm
So…acording to you Dee. Micheal Jackson jokes are too soon? How about this one…a nice politically incorrect son of a bitch joke.
Micheal Jackson’s wife made a public statement today; “First my parents leave me in Portugal, then my husband dies. FML”
Pretty funny, you messed up the dates of the comments tho =/ should have been (at least) close to the year of the status… don’t u think?
Posted by Jeremy on August 20th, 2010 at 2:10 pm
OMG those poor dinosaurs! How dare you disrespect their memories! Those dinosaurs were innocent creatures and you people SPIT on their graves! HOW DARE YOU! (sarcasm)
This was too funny..I think God has a sense of humor and does not like his people depressed all the time just let it be fun jeez my Pastor would find it hilarious about Jesus saying I GOT THIS DAD too cute…Creative and Funny Family Guy does it all the time and I love the show…who do you think gave you the ability to laugh…Lighten up
Posted by motolove on August 20th, 2010 at 3:12 pm
Jokes about God offend christians, not God.
She could give a shit.
Posted by LowPro on August 20th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
The only people REALLY WHINING here are the ones who want religious types to respect other people’s opinions. What’s REALLY FUNNY is that they don’t respect the opinions of religious types.
P.S.: I thought this whole thing was hysterically funny, so stay off my back.
Posted by Uptuck Genius on August 20th, 2010 at 4:03 pm
“Posted by Jon on August 19th, 2010 at 10:39 am
This was hilarious. Loved John Hancock’s pic of Lenny Kravitz lol”
It’s Hancock aka Will Smith…
form the movie of the same name.
you obviously COMPLETELY missed the point of that joke!
but still enjoyed it apparently…
gratz
Posted by KATRINA DILLER on August 20th, 2010 at 4:04 pm
OMG this is so freakin funny, please do more, this world could use a good belly shakin laugh like it gave me!!! kudo’s to u for this awesome humor!!!!
Posted by Kat on August 20th, 2010 at 4:05 pm
Hey, I’m religious and God’s FB was my absolute favorite! There was NOTHING offensive about it. They just took the first 2 chapters of Genesis and put it in FB form, very accurately! Stop your complaining!
Posted by Rob on August 20th, 2010 at 4:08 pm
Science flies people to the moon.
Religion flies people into buildings.
Posted by Jaybird on August 20th, 2010 at 4:16 pm
The reason why the God jokes are offensive to Christians it’s because the God they kno is a personal God involved in their lives – not just a mystical force out there.When you make fun of Him, you are making fun of something very important and special. Yeah, we do have a sense of humor, but if jokes are against something that you love, then it hurts. Doesn’t matter whether it’s funny or not (we can see the humor in it too – and if it wasn’t so important we might laugh) but jokes can hurt. Just lettin’ ya kno!
Posted by Mel on August 20th, 2010 at 6:20 pm
I have one:
Abe Lincoln: Just signed the amincation proclamtion-slaves are free…and why is everyone saying that this Obama guy has done so much for African Americans?
Posted by kingsley on August 20th, 2010 at 7:04 pm
i want to meet the genius that though of this. so brilliant
Posted by Mike on August 20th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
Bah, you guys complaining about the religious jokes need to lighten up. If you can’t see the mild humour in it, then you’re waaay too serious and need to step back.
Getting your knickers in a knot over perceived insults about your religion has started enough wars, wouldn’t you say?
Anyways, this was frickin’ funny
Posted by Pras on August 20th, 2010 at 7:50 pm
Funny. End of.
I think its fair to believe all the hyper-sensitivity is from americans. Go have some counselling or something… Its better to see the funny side of tragedy than whine and cry about it all the time.
Go pop some anti-depressants or whatever you lot do……
For the large number of non-whining americans – can you go slap the whining ones? Thanks ;o)
Posted by Wow, really? on August 20th, 2010 at 7:55 pm
See, I read this and was all, ‘Oooh, I’m going to get to the comments and people will be UP IN ARMS over the Columbia joke!’
Then I get to the comments and people wind up UP IN ARMS over…one of the gentler, nicer jokes? Guys, just because God and Jesus are the subjects of a joke doesn’t make it disrespectful. Stop being idiotic. ‘Oh, no, they took the story of creation, reduced it to its basic points, and put it in the vernacular! And used the Buddy Christ! BURN THEM. BURN THEM ALL.’ Really? Are you kidding me right now?
I submit that anyone offended by the God joke is not a Christian. There. I said it.
Posted by Dude on August 20th, 2010 at 7:57 pm
Oh come on, G-d would love this, he/she has a great sense of humour, have you seen a Platypus?
Posted by Rob McAllister on August 20th, 2010 at 10:29 pm
Can we PLEAZE get a reference to “The Donner Party” in there? The comic possibilities are virtually ENDLESS!
OMG was this funny. It made my day!
Posted by W. Thompson on August 20th, 2010 at 10:37 pm
@ Sir Tony Rudd – Yes, “Titantic”. It rhymes with “pedantic”.
Posted by skitten on August 20th, 2010 at 11:06 pm
@Jerry…obvious troll is obvious
@everyone else…PLEASE DON”T FEED THE TROLLS
Posted by dilligaf on August 20th, 2010 at 11:51 pm
all you people complaining that God was used in jokes, WOW. Pathetic and get over it. I garauntee you have laughed at something that offended somebody. It was funny, that’s it. F@^$ing politically correct BS. By the way God laughed at this when I shared it with Him, and told me to say if you don’t like it, simply don’t read it.
Posted by Trixie on August 21st, 2010 at 12:12 am
Hilarious! More please!!!!!!
Posted by Davotchka on August 21st, 2010 at 1:28 am
MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE!!
That was hilarious!
It took me a minute to the Newton one.
Posted by Mikeelectro on August 21st, 2010 at 1:31 am
now the titanic was hilarious!!!
Posted by Felicity on August 21st, 2010 at 1:38 am
Love that the God picture is the one from Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Posted by James on August 21st, 2010 at 1:53 am
I say we have a war to decide which religion is more peaceful
and while you all are doing that…
This Buddhist will be drinking tea in the corner
BTW, the Columbia space shuttle was a bit poor in taste, but the others rocked!
Posted by Tobemori on August 21st, 2010 at 3:58 am
It seems like some people wilfully misinterpret humour, just so they can get offended and point their self-righteous finger at someone else. If you make the effort to read the joke properly, you will notice that they don’t make fun of God and Jesus in any way; in fact, they express the doctrines and beliefs very cleverly.They do satirise the human misbehaviour and the historical actions of human religious authorities, however, so I suppose that if some people worship The Church, rather than God and Jesus, then yes, they will find grounds for offense. More importantly, this was hilarious!
Posted by Sriram pLasma on August 21st, 2010 at 4:12 am
Hilarious!
Posted by Costley on August 21st, 2010 at 4:28 am
BEST. THING. EVER!!!!
and as a strong christian i was not offended, chill out guys, laugh a little…you’ll live longer :/
God bless America! and God…please help some people with their sense of humor, help them lighten up
Posted by salil on August 21st, 2010 at 5:17 am
i have only two words to say abt it HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!
How you guys get these crazy ideas????
Posted by Thumbellina on August 21st, 2010 at 6:06 am
freaking hillarious, just made my day:))
Posted by annation on August 21st, 2010 at 6:44 am
loved the WHOLE article.
i think at this point it’s not the article that’s getting everyone fired up, but it’s all the comments.
Posted by Joshua L. on August 21st, 2010 at 9:55 am
Haha, super cool. Loved the church part.
Posted by Sam on August 21st, 2010 at 10:08 am
I’m a so called Uber-Christian and thought the God section was a riot. Columbia, a little distasteful for me. That’s not far enough in History to be funny. There were 7 people killed and their families are still dealing with the loss.
Posted by joyce on August 21st, 2010 at 10:38 am
After julius ceasar’s last comment, the party-goers should chant, “TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!”
Posted by martani_net on August 21st, 2010 at 11:29 am
hahahaaa
I adore the Galileo one, “are you high bro’ XD”
Posted by dvltash on August 21st, 2010 at 12:22 pm
I thought this article was hilarious. Anyone with half a brain understands the point. To the people taking “offence” to the references to God and the church, get a life. YOU are the problem. Not articles like these.
I’m a Christ-follower and thought this was hilarious – so there! Woot! I love how Jesus only has to say one thing in all this, and it’s like putting that last cherry on the sundae to make it perfect, hahaha
If this is done about 100 or so years from now…
Judge Vaughn R. Walker: Hey hey! Guess what? It turns out that a private moral view of same sex couples being inferior to opposite sex couples is not a proper basis for legislation
The Church: AAAAAARRRRRGGGH!!!!!! I F^@KING HATE YOU ALL!!!
Funny.
One small glitch. You got the timelines wrong with the comments to the original posts. Sucked the fun a tad bit away.
Posted by God on August 21st, 2010 at 5:01 pm
I lol’d.
Posted by abby on August 21st, 2010 at 6:32 pm
the columbia space shuttle exploded leaving earth, not returning. funnier if the facts were accurate.
Posted by Art on August 21st, 2010 at 8:00 pm
This is funny. Like some of the others, didn’t care for the Columbia bit. Comedy = tragedy + time. Just hasn’t been enough time to feel okay laughing about that.
Otherwise, officially, “hilar.”
Posted by Noel on August 21st, 2010 at 8:16 pm
This was hysterical! ESPECIALLY god creating shit and the church ‘disliking’. That’s exactly how it would have gone down- two thumbs way up.
Posted by Noel on August 21st, 2010 at 8:18 pm
P.S. Kudos on getting the bible-huggers in an uproar! It’s not a party until ‘christians’ are picketing at the door lol
Posted by Champ Champs on August 21st, 2010 at 8:43 pm
Great great hilarious stuff. Loved Newtons. The little things made it great, by far the best was John Hancock’s profile pic.
I’m religious, and I LOVED how they made fun of the church, but made God’s post’s just, just so humorous.
Like if it was during the colonial era:
The Church posts “YA CHRISTIANS SHOWED THOSE INGINES WHOS BOSS! We got braggin rights this century. #1 From sea to shining sea bitches!”
Jesus comments “OMD, really guys? Did you even listen to what I was sayin back in the day? >:|”
Posted by Krahs on August 21st, 2010 at 10:10 pm
I think these comments are evidence that the inventors of religon were the greatest trolls in human history.
Posted by Ashleigh on August 21st, 2010 at 11:58 pm
This was hilarious! All of it. I am Catholic and enjoyed the God part. It’s really not offensive if you have a sense of humor.
Posted by cheddy_bear on August 22nd, 2010 at 12:08 am
sooo love the whole article!!!cool…and very funny… xD
Posted by noldberg on August 22nd, 2010 at 2:17 am
I thought they were all great. The Titanic ones were spectacular. “Bitch slapped a pussy Iceberg” I mean come on how can you think that’s NOT funny? Great job whoever wrote these.
Posted by Jennifer Coronado on August 22nd, 2010 at 2:39 am
Posted by Filip on August 20th, 2010 at 2:37 am
It’s also a shame that Jennifer is retarded and doesn’t know how to type. Also inte the retarded family: That Jerry guy and his ancient book.
LOL @ how Jerry can’t spell OR type… I can certainly do both.
Posted by zaphiel on August 22nd, 2010 at 2:41 am
proof that god has a sense of humor: he made us
and it defiantly needed to be longer maybe some stuff about hitler and the world wars maybe even add something about when the fallen goes to earth XD
Posted by Ken on August 22nd, 2010 at 3:41 am
Columbia Space Shuttle did not make me chuckle. Everything else I thought was hilarious. More, please!
Posted by Mohanraj Shankar on August 22nd, 2010 at 5:05 am
Wow..good stuff.
and ther’ll be lots of stuff to write about other cultures and religions too..I wish I were free to do that.
I’m supposed to be a Hindu and I can think of 100′s of such funny things. But my ppl will not take them sportively. And we cant dare thinking something abt Islam,let alone writing.
Posted by Alan on August 22nd, 2010 at 6:43 am
LMFAO and for those crying about the God thing why not just go meet your imaginary maker and tell him about it? Besides it will do the rest of us with a brain a favour IF your imaginary friend had a problem then wouldn`t we all be smited down already, damn get over yourself I was taught as a child imaginary friends were stupid and then some dick tells me of an imaginary friend in the sky. You can bet I laughed my arse off at him and threw a billion questions all of which he couldn`t answer.
Posted by Bam on August 22nd, 2010 at 9:49 am
Bible-thumpers gotta ruin everything. Go read your Bibles, kids…. cover to cover. I think you’ll find you’re doing shit wrong anyway. I found it all funny. I can see where someone could be upset about the Columbia one but then again, it’s history. Not necessarily a joke. It’s history with a humorous spin on it. I liked it.
Posted by Jackie_Fifty-Seven on August 22nd, 2010 at 10:44 am
OK, let’s just get the whole ‘inappropriate jokes’ thing out of our system, ‘k?
Space shuttle Challenger disaster:
- NASA is going to switch to Sprite because they can’t get Seven Up
- Christa Mcauliffe said to her husband before she left: “You feed the cat, I’ll feed the fish”
- What color were Christa Mcauliffe’s eyes? Blue. One blew here, one blew there.
- “NO, I said BUD LIGHT”
Done.
Posted by Angela on August 22nd, 2010 at 11:24 am
“Jesus:I got this, Dad.” LMAO!!
Posted by Garnet Crow on August 22nd, 2010 at 11:53 am
THIS IS TOO FUNNY! If teachers would share entertaining things like this for the kids to read to help them get interested in History, they would be more engaged in the classroom setting. Just sayin’!
Love the God stuff! Love the Darwin stuff! Love the Asteroid stuff! It’s all Great & very creative!
Posted by Mr.Od on August 22nd, 2010 at 1:22 pm
the Cockroach was awesome LoL
God was bored so he created LIGHT LoL
this is hilarious ! ! !
Posted by Adam on August 22nd, 2010 at 1:22 pm
God gave me a penis, are you telling me he’s not making fun of us constantly? Humanity is the biggest joke in the universe. Original sin my foot; What could an omniscient, omnipotent, all loving, all caring, superior being want for it’s creations except for them to be happy and peaceful for the duration of their existence? And then extremists come in and start killing people in the name of their all loving, all caring, all forgiving, God. “We’re pro-life, and we’re gonna kill you in the name of peace and love!”
Worship how you want to worship, nobody is stopping you. We live in a land built on the freedom to practice religion as we see fit, or not at all.
Posted by ???? on August 22nd, 2010 at 1:35 pm
haha loved this
i got one too:
Pandora: got a gift from zeus today
Prometheus:…What is it?!
pandora: eh some box, looks cool but i cant open it for some reason
zeus: unless you like nasty shit going on….
pandora: :O
“eris likes this”
Posted by peppinator on August 22nd, 2010 at 1:56 pm
I’m surprised how many people are confused about the Challenger vs. the Columbia Space Shuttle disasters. Let’s clarify: the Challenger exploded during take-off in 1986 and was NOT mentioned in this (very funny) set of fake posts. The Columbia had damage to its heat shields or some such and exploded on reentry in 2003.
Personally, I think Columbia jokes are “too soon,” but only w.r.t. me finding it funny. I don’t think that it means someone shouldn’t tell them — everyone’s “too soon” will be different. And it also depends a bit on how funny it is — honestly, the funnier it is, the sooner you can tell the joke.
Also — everyone calm down about the whole “god” thing — there are not actually very many people “complaining” about it. Its all the responses that are making it look like a big deal. Like a previous poster said, “Don’t feed the trolls.” (Even though I think its pretty judgmental to call them trolls, its still true that we’re just feeding intolerance when we give those ideas so much “air time” by continuing to talk about it.) Oops, look at me, continuing to talk about it…
Posted by MIss Wynonna on August 22nd, 2010 at 2:42 pm
HAA HAA HAA I LOVES IT!!! When you parody and satirize you do not get to pick and choose,it is ALL fair game……You make fun of it ALL or NOTHING AT ALL…..Keep up the EXCELLENT work!!
Posted by jackie on August 22nd, 2010 at 2:49 pm
i also am a Christ follower and i found the post about God to be hilarious. it was smart and witty and frankly very funny and i don’t think the author was attempting to be offensive. well played… however i agree with the space shuttle, a bit in poor taste. would love to see more of the rest though, too!
Posted by Zuhaib Zaman on August 22nd, 2010 at 3:00 pm
Lolz… hilarious!!!
Posted by Arumakan on August 22nd, 2010 at 4:16 pm
Fucking funny!
Posted by Sonia on August 22nd, 2010 at 4:25 pm
People who can’t deal with others even MENTIONING their religion in satire (A) Don’t know a whole hell of a lot about the true meaning of their religion and (B) Are the reason people used to get burned at the stake/ are being blown up by suicide bombers.
Very funny!!! Some of the comments had me lmao too! Looking forward to reading more…
Posted by James on August 22nd, 2010 at 10:29 pm
Hi….I’m religious. And that God stuff you did was downright hilarious Well played!
Posted by Kenny on August 23rd, 2010 at 2:02 am
I agree with the bulk of this list of posters – get a grip on what offends you – this was innocent joking and not ABOUT ‘YOUR God” (which I always find to be a funny reference). And just for grins, I love when anyone references the Pseudonomicon. (look for it).
Funny stuff Bible thumpers get over yourselves.
Posted by Per on August 23rd, 2010 at 4:00 am
Love it.
But why isnt it chronological?
Posted by Ben on August 23rd, 2010 at 5:42 am
Ok, that was hilarious. Especially John Hancock’s pic. Oh man I almost died there.
Now, the Columbia one, I thought anyway, was too far. That was a little tasteless, but as far as the God jokes go, that wasn’t over any line. The most offensive part was Jesus’ comment and even that wasn’t terrible. Lighten up people.
propper funny !! all of it !! jerry……. f**k off…twatt
Posted by kelly on August 23rd, 2010 at 10:27 am
Um… Ben Franklin did not sign the declaration of independence.
Posted by amit on August 23rd, 2010 at 10:53 am
lol lol lol!!
Posted by ThomGroentje on August 23rd, 2010 at 11:18 am
Really funny! More of this!
Posted by David on August 23rd, 2010 at 11:48 am
Blasphemy is a victimless crime.
Posted by BuddyGirl on August 23rd, 2010 at 11:58 am
It’s fine to make fun of god and Jesus and all that, because they never existed. They are myths. Stories. Fiction. Making fun of fictional creations is fine. Making fun of people who waste their lives “believing” in fictional creations is fine, too. Disrespectful? Too bad- do something worth of respect, then.
Posted by bobbob on August 23rd, 2010 at 12:11 pm
god is laughing his ass off
Posted by Dee on August 23rd, 2010 at 12:50 pm
Boris,
I *did* day ‘guideline, not law’, and also ‘unless it’s really funny’.
I have to say I didn’t get yours. I don’t really follow pop culture that closely, so it could be hilarious, I just didn’t get the reference (or else it was more of a quote than a joke)
Dee
Posted by stevie on August 23rd, 2010 at 12:56 pm
OMG this is hilarious!! I even clicked older posts because I wanted more! You guys gotta do some more of these…Henry VIII would be hilarious!
[...] should teach us a lot of things. We would probably pay a lot more attention if it had a Facebook status, but there are still things we can learn. Your dad will always be better at fixing shit than you. [...]
Posted by derjanni on August 23rd, 2010 at 1:49 pm
The comments are probably funnier than the actual post itself.
Religious headbangers = lots of lols.
Or am I being ‘unrespectful’ to all you people who live in fear of the big bogeyman in the sky?
Posted by 4th in last stand on August 23rd, 2010 at 2:21 pm
Um, yes Ben Franklin did sign the declaration of independence. Kelly, you’re special.
Posted by S.S. on August 23rd, 2010 at 3:47 pm
Oooh. Too soon on the Columbia Space Shuttle one. Too soon. But the rest, pretty hilarious.
Posted by Soham Bakshi on August 23rd, 2010 at 4:01 pm
this is just a bit extra hillarious! the original sin!! haha.
Posted by elizabeth hoberg on August 23rd, 2010 at 4:50 pm
funny BUT Darwin did not say we evolved from lower primates or apes or that creatures evolve from lower life form so it was a misquote but still…
Posted by JesusLover on August 23rd, 2010 at 5:37 pm
I didn’t find the Titanic/Columbia stuff that funny, but God and The Church made me lol. SOOOO clever! This was really well done and I hope to see more with political scandals (like Monica Lewinsky and George Rekers).
And to the person who was wondering about people marrying brothers and sisters in the Bible, read Genesis more carefully. It says that the sons of God (Adam’s descendants) and the daughters of man (descendants of the people created when God said to Adam “let’s make man in our image”) got together. Some believe that Adam and Eve were in Eden and other created people were hanging out elsewhere, so no incest necessary. Just a theory.
Posted by Patrick Burnett on August 23rd, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Good idea. Lame execution.
Posted by Nietzsche on August 23rd, 2010 at 7:30 pm
Gott ist tot. No, really! Ask Kant or Plato!
Posted by Chris on August 23rd, 2010 at 7:48 pm
All of this was great, thanks! And if we weren’t such a crazed, worked-up world these days I think people would just ignore the humorless Christians as pathetic and unfortunate. On the space shuttle joke, I’d say it wasn’t so much disrespectful as just the only joke that happened to fall flat. The exception that proved the rule.
Posted by jen on August 23rd, 2010 at 9:17 pm
totally agree that the Columbia one is too soon, but these are funny for sure!
Brilliant! I used it as part of my lesson in class and the students love it!! Should make more of this and turns it into a collection.
Good job!
Posted by shirlyn on August 23rd, 2010 at 10:19 pm
Funny stuff. All the posts are even funnier. I’m a Christian and I didn’t find the God stuff offensive. Had to cringe a bit on the Columbia one but that is just my opinion and I wouldn’t dream of forcing it on anyone. If you’re upset by finding anything offensive maybe you should stick to reading the phonebook…probably nothing there to offend your tender sensibilities.
LOVED the cockroach post !
Posted by tacomama on August 23rd, 2010 at 10:48 pm
holy sh*t.. that was amazing..cant stop laughing..
hats off to the idea.. great..will pass this on to everyone..
Posted by Allah on August 24th, 2010 at 5:05 am
Not bad – a facebook script of strictly religious characters would be better
Posted by Eva on August 24th, 2010 at 5:53 am
One thing I’ve never gotten is why religious people are so sure that Jesus/God etc. don’t have a sense of humor. They’re supposed to be all loving and all perfect and all awesome, right? Then who’s to say that they couldn’t appreciate some gentle ribbing?
P.S. The religious stuff was awesome. Still trying to figure out how it was offensive.
Posted by John on August 24th, 2010 at 6:54 am
‘God and the Snake like this’ – Brilliant!
Posted by AndreaB on August 24th, 2010 at 9:15 am
The religion stuff…as everyone above has put it is just as real to those who believe as the other moments in history included in this posting. Whether you are offended or not, our words have power and the audience that we should care about is not the group who believe in God and don’t like this, it’s the group that doesn’t believe. These are the people who are most effected by a joke about creation or joke about sin or any other word that attempts to remove the power and sanctity of God’s Presence. The Bible tells us that God is both forgiving and jealous and has given us free will to live as we want and the power of the tongue to either bless or curse. How you choose to use those gifts is up to you.
Posted by CW on August 24th, 2010 at 9:34 am
It’s interesting to note that 1 comment from an (unverified) offended person of religious belief (Jerry) sparks a storm of hate-filled invective from multiple posts, overshadowing the dozens of comments from (again, unverified) unoffended persons of religious belief.
Another perfect example of how the supposedly TOLERANT are among the least so.
Posted by JudyBG on August 24th, 2010 at 12:54 pm
CW: You are brilliant. You captured the issue in a nutshell.
And I speak as a priest.
By the way, I laughed at all of it, except the dead astronauts. Yes, people can and do make jokes about things like that. We have an expression for that kind of humour. We call it cruel.
Posted by Henners on August 24th, 2010 at 1:35 pm
Great stuff guys!
and on the earlier post, one of the prophet with the no dp picture would be amazing!
why does everyone have to get in to arguments about religion and all that i’m an Atheist with Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu and Rastafarian friends, we all found this hilarious. when people stop getting offended by pieces of work like this then the less wars well be having and less humans will die…
WE ARE ALL HUMAN AND ALL THE SAME GET OVER YOURSELVES!
love
Posted by Sean on August 24th, 2010 at 2:01 pm
That shit was motherfucking funny goddamnitt. Fuck you.
Posted by Big Ben's Bathrrom Love on August 24th, 2010 at 9:20 pm
The best is when people are so “religious” they don’t believe in dinosaurs. How stupid can you be? This was very funny, and I’m glad most of us with some common sense enjoyed it.
Posted by Brandon on August 24th, 2010 at 9:31 pm
CW –
The only thing that doesn’t deserve tolerance is intolerance. Calling anyone’s own religious belief beyond reproach is downright intolerant. There is nothing disrespectful about skepticism and criticism.
These people’s posts most likely reflect a backlash of having to deal with religious opinion and political division based on religious belief being forced down their throats almost daily. Religious belief is the cause of many an ache and pain and being able to laugh at it is paramount and being chastised as being disrespectful for doing so should only be met with contempt.
Posted by Allyson on August 25th, 2010 at 1:18 am
Wow! That was great lol! You shut your mouth! Shut it right now! hahahaha
By the way, I believe in God, I am a christian and I did not find the “God jokes” offensive in any way. On the contrary, they were very witty and clever!
Lighten up, people!
Nobody loves a fanatic! (and this goes to both sides of this quarrel”!
Posted by Brooklyn on August 25th, 2010 at 6:19 am
Brilliant… and the religious crybabies are pretty damn funny too.
Posted by Mypoeticmuse on August 25th, 2010 at 9:48 am
Look… I’m a Christian and I thought the whole thing was funny as get out. Stop taking things so personally!
Posted by Farah on August 25th, 2010 at 11:04 am
brilliant. for most parts
Posted by jamal on August 25th, 2010 at 11:44 am
nice thinking dude, awesome history… need more ^_^
HAHAHA, the dinosaurs, John Hancock, Titanic…. So awesome.
Posted by Pete Granzeau on August 25th, 2010 at 7:02 pm
Very funny.
The pedant in me would like to point out: (1) in the God post, the Church didn’t exist until after the life and death of Jesus. (2) in the Julius Caesar post, the affair wasn’t at the old villa, it was in the Forum outside the Senate, and probably during daylight.
Posted by C'mon Now on August 25th, 2010 at 7:30 pm
FWIW, the Catholic Church has never had a real problem with Darwin. When his theory came out, the Church had already started to view Genesis non-literally. As far as I know, their reaction to evolution has pretty much been, “Yeah, maybe.”
hilarious stuff – I’m not sure which one I liked best… maybe the church’s reactions. It reminds me of the idiots who deny global warming.
Posted by mike on August 25th, 2010 at 7:55 pm
Funny stuff! People getting sensitive about religion need to quit sulking though. It’s real funny as long as it’s about someone else’s faults, huh..
Posted by Beeee on August 25th, 2010 at 8:34 pm
That’s hilarious dude! I love it. more more…
Posted by MWZ on August 25th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
For the most part, pretty funny. The Columbia Space Shuttle was f’ed up though… I wouldn’t even joke about that. I loved God’s status. Jesus saves all fo sho!
All the flaming posts about Christians and monotheism have no place in the comment section except the trash can or street corner. If people were offended, then let them be offended. Don’t offend them even more.
Posted by Q on August 25th, 2010 at 9:51 pm
Funny enough that I’m willing to forgive biblical stories being included alongside actual history.
Posted by Smitz on August 25th, 2010 at 9:57 pm
MORE PLEASE!!!!! (more statuses, not more people bitchin about jokes)
Posted by God on August 25th, 2010 at 10:27 pm
I wasn’t offended. Read harder! I hate it when people confuse my posts with “The Church”s posts!
Is God gonna have to smite a bitch?
Posted by Hit Ha on August 25th, 2010 at 10:56 pm
couldn’t stop laughing =D
Posted by chillpill on August 25th, 2010 at 11:03 pm
how come noone has mentioned 9/11??…is it really too soon?…i’ve heard jokes far and wide….
i think it’s all relative to the audience, and i think the audience intended was for those with a sense of humor
Posted by itslikemusic on August 25th, 2010 at 11:30 pm
BAHA YESSSS!!!!!!!!! greatest EVER! i love it.
Posted by God on August 25th, 2010 at 11:47 pm
You imbeciles. Of course I have a sense of humor. I created humans, didn’t I? Wait until the ships arrive. I’m gonna have a blast.
Posted by rhiana79 on August 26th, 2010 at 12:40 am
Christopher Columbus: OK guys, wish me luck. West Indies here we come. We’re all gonna be rich!!!
Queen Isabella: Good luck Chris. You wanna borrow my TomTom?
Christopher Columbus: Nah… I got this.
Posted by Mommydragon27 on August 26th, 2010 at 2:01 am
It was funny. Some parts were in poor taste,but funny none the less.Shame on some of you! Lighten up! This is HUMOUR. Stop being so serious!
Posted by Gypsie Rose on August 26th, 2010 at 2:47 am
EPIC WIN!! I haven’t laughed that hard in months thank you so very much. For the Dog oppps God whiners get a life. Not everyone believes in that shit you call a religion.
Are updates to this available for the e-mail? I love my e-mail funnies. XD
Posted by Kim on August 26th, 2010 at 7:18 am
lolzzzz… can’t stop reading it over and over again. Still laughing. I’m a Christian and I even forwarded this to my missionary friends. I’m sure they’ll love it too.
Skipping the Columbia one though. I fail to see how that is funny. Other than that, this is one of the funniest stuff I’ve read this month.
Posted by Kristen on August 26th, 2010 at 7:31 am
This was amazing! What’s even more amazing is the fact that a couple people saying “don’t make fun of god” (baiting?) created 95% of the comments following it. Hey, at least we’re having a discourse about god? yay.
Posted by Fred Nurk on August 26th, 2010 at 7:31 am
England – why do you have the UNION FLAG as your avatar? It should be the CROSS OF St George.
Posted by Jennifer on August 26th, 2010 at 7:37 am
Okay i’m a Christian but and the God part in this article was hilarious ! There was nothing disrespectful about it at all ! Lighten up people ! Great article !
Posted by Ahmed Hassouna on August 26th, 2010 at 8:24 am
So damn funny
Posted by Matty S on August 26th, 2010 at 9:13 am
Love this whole page! Noone has had a go at Jerry for a while so… Hey Jerry, why don’t you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself!
Posted by Robert on August 26th, 2010 at 9:24 am
@Fred Nurk, yes should be cross of St. George if the American war of independence was against England which it wasn’t.
The war was against all of Great Britain prior to the Union with Ireland. So it should be the pre 1801 Union Jack cross of St. George for England plus saltire of St. Andrew for Scotland (but omitting the cross of St. Patrick for Ireland) if we really want total accuracy ;S
Posted by Patricia on August 26th, 2010 at 9:35 am
AWESOMENESS!!! This totally made my morning!
Posted by Robert on August 26th, 2010 at 9:49 am
Oliver Cromwell: @King Charles 1, you are total up yourself dude
King Charles: You are a right pain in the neck and my Irish mates hate you too
Oliver Cromwell: @ King Charles 1 – Loser! WTF
Posted by Kyle on August 26th, 2010 at 10:08 am
Frickin’ hilarious! As a history fanatic, seeing this spin on things really lightened up my day–Never seen such a take on history, especially the Ben Franklin post. Made me laugh my ass off.
Posted by Marta on August 26th, 2010 at 10:19 am
Absolutely brilliant.
Posted by Nehal on August 26th, 2010 at 11:02 am
That was like so funny , the whole article was hilarious!
Do More … ^_^
Posted by Doo Doo Head on August 26th, 2010 at 11:20 am
None of this was funny. I’m not offended in any way, so that’s not why I’m saying this. I truly did not think any of this was even amusing.
Posted by beti morar on August 26th, 2010 at 11:53 am
Oh my Goooooood!! These jokes are very funny! =))=))=))))))))))))))
But the God jokes are the most funniest! And the Titanic too! And the Darwin! Oh all of them are cool!!!!!!!!
Posted by Mandy on August 26th, 2010 at 12:28 pm
Why do you uberreligiosos have to quash everybody’s mellows? All the time? Everytime anything is said about anything? Shit!!!
Posted by Jason on August 26th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
I don’t recall ever reading in the Bible that the Earth is 6k years old. Then again, I ain’t read the whole bible lol. But seriously, in my old church, when I was younger, nobody EVER said how old they though the earth was. Must be some radical christians saying that.
Posted by mowhamid on August 26th, 2010 at 2:09 pm
I bet if you put a joke on their about allah the muslims would riot and issue death threats and fatwahs decreeing the creators death.
Posted by Matthew on August 26th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
Outstanding.
Posted by kn33ch41 on August 26th, 2010 at 3:40 pm
It seems to have taken Newton 344 years and 25 minutes to understand that principle.
Posted by Alex on August 26th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
Lover the asteroid joke and the Cockroach comment, it was amazing… couldnt stuff laughing…
if you cant laugh at the religious jokes then your faith in God and religion is weak enough that it could be shaken by a simple facebook joke…
Posted by KBailey on August 26th, 2010 at 4:43 pm
So, let me get this straight… It’s okay to make jokes about our country’s founding fathers, but not the world’s founding father??!!
Give me a break. People like you give Christians a bad name. I happen to be a Christian, and I thought this was hilarious (yep, including the Gad parts)
Grow a sense of humor.
Kudos to the creator of this! Nicely done sir/maam
Posted by Kelly on August 26th, 2010 at 4:46 pm
Very funny and clever, but the Columbia reference is in poor taste. It’s hard to find humor in a national tragedy so recent, if ever. Just my opinion…
Posted by Shelbie on August 26th, 2010 at 4:54 pm
If you can’t take a joke about God, then you might as well never leave your house.
Posted by Ashar on August 26th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
LOL…can’t stop laughing..Quality work..specially the God one, Galileo, Ben Franklin..lol
Posted by Ellizabeth on August 26th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
LMFAO! the god thing. jesus: dont worry dad, im on it. lmfaooooooooooooooooooooooo
titanic thing was hlarioussssssss! i love the maker of this
i was reeally bored, soo yuh kinda made me less bored so thanks (: lmfaaao
Posted by good one.. on August 26th, 2010 at 5:17 pm
Oh good grief, some people need to lighten up. I consider myself a Christian thought they were ALL hysterical!
Posted by Kex on August 26th, 2010 at 6:17 pm
Hilarious! Didn’t find the god-part that funny though, until i read Jerry’s comment! It’s the reminder that some people actually worships that stuff. Yet again, hilarious!
Posted by Lisa on August 26th, 2010 at 6:43 pm
As an American living in London and married to an English man, I FUCKING LOVE THE BEN FRANKLIN POST!!!!! SOOOO funny! France Likes, hahaha!
Posted by Erin on August 26th, 2010 at 7:05 pm
Very funny, thanks so much.
The columbia joke made me sad, but I didn’t see anything wrong with it, it was just more poignant.
And yeah, god jokes are ALWAYS funny!
Posted by Donna on August 26th, 2010 at 7:21 pm
This is funny shiz…
Posted by mittle fritz on August 26th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
hilarious & well done….
exceptin’ the whole “Ancient Asteroid” crack – you see I worship Ancient Asteroids and I expect every random site I come across on the interwebs to respect my wacky belief system regardless of how hilarious and astute the observations may be – it should all be deleted to protect my moronic eyes.
Posted by Abhay on August 26th, 2010 at 8:03 pm
I haven’t laughed this hard in a while
Posted by Nicole on August 26th, 2010 at 9:19 pm
Freaking hysterical ! More more more!
Posted by Kydo on August 26th, 2010 at 9:28 pm
It was hilarious and why would someone get mad becasue of the God part or find it desrespectful. You close minded fools. Stop living in fear and except what life truly is.
Posted by Kydo on August 26th, 2010 at 9:29 pm
haha. well said Mittle fritz
Posted by Nate on August 26th, 2010 at 10:57 pm
MOAR!!!!
Posted by Derek B on August 26th, 2010 at 11:46 pm
I want more of these!!! I love them…
Posted by Mo on August 27th, 2010 at 12:58 am
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Posted by John on August 27th, 2010 at 1:27 am
Okay, this was not even remotely funny, witty or clever. Are you all really this entertained? My guess is that the original author posted half of these comments.
Fail.
Posted by Catherine on August 27th, 2010 at 2:46 am
I’m confused what “hit the jump to see more” means. I WANNA SEE MORE!!!
Posted by toby on August 27th, 2010 at 5:24 am
Haha, this is brilliant!
by the way, it’s not the god bit (i wont give this mythical bloke a capital G by the way) that’s offensive to me… it’s religion full stop that’s offensive!
I do love these people that need a crutch from their imaginary friend in the clouds to make excuses for all their failings in life!! They’re offensive as christians to me by BEING christians, as they have, without question, been brainwashed from birth to beleive their imaginery friend is real, and all other religions’ imaginary friends (Allah etc) are not. Hilarious! (same goes for all other religions tho!).
These same people don’t acknowledge the fact the bible is full of contradictions, and was written 100s of years ago by several different blokes centuries after things were supposed to have happened (some clearly did, but this Jesus chap, whilst probably a very good bloke in reality, well his acts of kindness sort of spiralled into mythical feats of godliness with the passing of time…).
… then the holy roman empire came along to continue to interfere, murder, crusade, pillage and make war in the name of their pretend mate… to feather their own nests. Same thing today. How many million Americans are members of evangelical churches?, which appear to all be fronted by super fake tanned white teeth filled smiling ‘pastors’ that appear to be living off those ‘tithes’ quite nicely thank ya’ll very much! …
So to me, it’s the people saying they’re christians that really offend, because at some point in their lives and in their logic, they completely disengage their thinking brains, which is the most dangerous and offensive thing someone can do. Hence the strife the world is in today.
But back to the humour, more of this please – fecking hilarious!!!!!
Posted by George Smith on August 27th, 2010 at 6:01 am
We all knew that NASA stands for need another seven astronauts…..
Posted by Sharon on August 27th, 2010 at 7:17 am
This is really funny – lets have some more. – And Christians usually have a sence of humour so keep it as it is.
Posted by Relick on August 27th, 2010 at 8:11 am
funny shit man, funny shit!! )
the church stuff was the best
sorry about your belief in asteroids mittle fritz =))))
Posted by Adam on August 27th, 2010 at 9:20 am
God has a sense of humor too. Just look at the platypus. Get over it.
Posted by Vania on August 27th, 2010 at 9:28 am
i like the “bro” thing! haha
and when Jesus said “I got this Dad”
Posted by Adam on August 27th, 2010 at 9:34 am
And for the record, God put the tree there because he WANTED us to eat of it. Because he was bored and wanted someone to talk to that wasn’t constantly brown-nosing his arse.
Posted by E on August 27th, 2010 at 9:57 am
i love God and am a conservative Christian, and i loved this! “don’t worry dad, i got this!” – hilarious!! =D not everyone gets offended that easily =)
Posted by Darrell on August 27th, 2010 at 10:28 am
Agree with God having a sense of humor. Challenger little too soon.
The Afghanistan Gynecology Association developed the IED IUD contraceptive. As sperm swims past, the contraceptive explodes and kills them. Funny but too soon.
Posted by Denise on August 27th, 2010 at 10:48 am
this is so funny !!! and btw Christians DO have a sense of humor actually, the God part was my favorite
Posted by Sean on August 27th, 2010 at 11:43 am
LOL This was a laugh riot. I almost think people should like…make these profiles. It’d be just hilarious to do so
Posted by Sean on August 27th, 2010 at 11:45 am
Oh and John…you clearly have no sense of humour.
Posted by Christopher on August 27th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
Pretty hilarious all around. kudos to whoever thought it up
Posted by vocabulary on August 27th, 2010 at 1:17 pm
To: Human…I think you were shooting for “Disrespectful…” If “unrespectful” was correct, the good lord would have put it in the dictionary that way
Posted by Anita on August 27th, 2010 at 1:31 pm
Except for Columbia…totally hilarious.
Posted by Dinah Hurst on August 27th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
This is really funny and cute. Hey, I’m religious to and don’t have a problem with a couple of religious jokes and who nows,(NO-ONE), but maybe God thinks it’s funny to. So all you little religious crack heads need to stop thinking for God and judging others. You’re giving us nice Christians a bad name.
Posted by Borat on August 27th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
Please make a FB status with Allah in it
Posted by 0rangeJulius on August 27th, 2010 at 2:35 pm
Hilario! The god one was the funniest… that and Titanic had me dyin laughin
Posted by Denise on August 27th, 2010 at 3:57 pm
@mowhamid yea I don’t think I’d put a Muslim joke in here —- they might, maybe just not take it to be funny ——
have to be PC ya know ( and careful bout what you make fun of in these days and times )
Posted by Fluffy on August 27th, 2010 at 4:12 pm
As a history teacher, I laughed outloud! Too bad I can’t share with my 7th graders.
Posted by JJL on August 27th, 2010 at 4:30 pm
Then, why not…
WOTW@WTC: Beautiful views, great meal…Is that a plan….
How funny is that!
What, too soon?
Posted by JJL on August 27th, 2010 at 4:33 pm
Even Better
JFK: Nice day in the Lone Star State, going to the luncheon with the top down. Big D Loves Me!
Posted by mfanwy on August 27th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
soz, but i cant find jerrys message, he sounds ike quite a character
Posted by JJL on August 27th, 2010 at 4:38 pm
Even Better:
JL&Y: Heading home from Studio, signed some dudes Catcher in the Rye, creepy.
Posted by Peter on August 27th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
Hilarious! Very creative. Looking forward to more. to Peeps who have a prob with it need to lighten up.
Posted by Rap Porter on August 27th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
Pretty funny … and could you please correct the spelling of Caesar’s name? ae, not ea.
Posted by Me on August 27th, 2010 at 5:31 pm
This is one of the funniest things I have read in a LONG time. Loved every word of it. Priceless!
Posted by Babylonsmasher on August 27th, 2010 at 5:51 pm
LMAO I was DONE immediately. “England -You done f d up now.” Bwahahahahaha. And it just got BETTER. The Titanic part DID suck though.
Posted by Cunkle on August 27th, 2010 at 5:58 pm
I couldn’t stop laughing about Abe Lincoln. And the cockroach was pretty funny as well.
Posted by Jenn on August 27th, 2010 at 6:29 pm
more more more more more more more more more more!!!!! post more!!!!
Posted by Paul in NJ on August 27th, 2010 at 6:31 pm
@Denise — see, that’s what is Effed up. If maybe Christians started beheading people who mocked them, like some Muslims, a lot of these jerks would suddenly find it isn’t cool to mock Christians any more. But is that the world we want to live in?
Posted by GOD on August 27th, 2010 at 6:33 pm
ALL YOU RELIGIOUS PEOPLE SUCK MY CREATION FOOLS, GET SOME TRUTH WITHIN YOU.
JESUS TOLD YOU I LIVE INSIDE OF YOU, GO THERE.
Posted by Pauline on August 27th, 2010 at 6:54 pm
Thank you! Brilliantly funny. Being a Brit, I particularly enjoyed Ben Franklin’s status (France likes this LOL).
dude, that asteroid one was hilarious. i loved how the brontosaurus had a picture of littlefoot! LMAO. and the cockroach was just like “lolokw/e.” put out more of them pls!
LOLOLOLOL!!
You made my day. Simply hilarious. Damn straight.
Posted by bubba on August 27th, 2010 at 9:49 pm
that’s awesome. i like it xD
Posted by Melissa on August 27th, 2010 at 10:54 pm
This is really funny, and if you don’t think God has a sense of humor you better think again. Without a sense of humor he might have gotten rid of us a long time ago.
Posted by Tomie on August 28th, 2010 at 12:09 am
ROFL – just stumbled on this, freakin hiii-larious!!
As for the whole being offended about the God thing…seriously?!
@ Darrell : Loved that contraceptive joke there! It’s never a bad thing to make jokes about so called terrorism and whatnot, in the words of Omid Djalili – “It just makes people feel less scared of them!”
Kudos dudes!
Posted by Kristy on August 28th, 2010 at 12:51 am
I can’t even imagine how clever a person must be to come up with this shit. Hahahhaah..so awesome.
Genius. I could have done without the Columbia Space Shuttle part (too soon, especially compared to the others) but other that that is was brilliant.
We need more of these.
Posted by Raggedy Android on August 28th, 2010 at 2:49 am
I assign my undergrads do this in my global civ courses. Well, without the cursing.
Posted by Jonny on August 28th, 2010 at 3:10 am
My favorite was the asteroid one, if I wanted to become a super-villain, I would make body-armor out of living cockroaches. I wouldn’t be satisfied until they decided to become my body-armor out of their own free will. Of course I could probably bend the rules a bit with some roach food.
Hahahaha omg i just loved the one with god and titanic =P <3
Posted by sm on August 28th, 2010 at 5:30 am
Brilliant…btw, they’re mostly making fun of the church (and mostly warranted),not so much religion or christianity.
Posted by Shelly on August 28th, 2010 at 5:36 am
Funny stuff…..can’t wait to read more.
Posted by Deeh on August 28th, 2010 at 8:02 am
Let’s calm down guys, I’m Christian too, but I actually thought this was quite hilarious. I take my religion seriously, and it’s inappropriate to make a joke of God and blaspheme, but I don’t believe this post was doing any of that. Disagree with me if you will, but I thought it was intelligent, actually…
Posted by Tony on August 28th, 2010 at 10:08 am
One they forgot:
Germany – heading to Poland for the weekend, or so.
Poland – Oh yeah? What for?
Germany – Lol..it’s a surpise!
Posted by arrra on August 28th, 2010 at 10:13 am
love it!!!!!!! the church and God part are great!
Posted by Tony on August 28th, 2010 at 12:12 pm
As a Christian, I had no problem with the God jokes. They were done tastefully, and were non-offensive. People need to get a sense of humor. And besides, non-believers are going to hell for a lot more reasons then making a few jokes!
Posted by fugaisi on August 28th, 2010 at 12:14 pm
This whole post is wildly offensive, not just the stuff about the church!!
Do you know how many British died in the revolution? Not to mention how insensative it is to dinosaurs. Everyone should be ashamed of themselves for reading this or even discussing it.
Posted by Liz on August 28th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
LMFAOOOOO! my sister thought i was laughing at rachel zoe project but i was really laughing at this. so funny. wish there was more. =D
Posted by Sarah on August 28th, 2010 at 12:43 pm
lmao now thats some funny shit
Posted by S on August 28th, 2010 at 2:40 pm
ALL of these were hilarious (including the God jokes) except the Columbia one…that’s much to recent, not to mention awful, to joke about.
Posted by maja on August 28th, 2010 at 4:01 pm
What you can´t joke about is not worth taking seriously… Don´t know who said it first but it´s true.
Posted by rob on August 28th, 2010 at 4:29 pm
So many butt-hurt religious people whining about the god joke, imagine how many idiotic liberals would be bitching about an Obama joke. hooah.
Posted by Keelhaul on August 28th, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Ummmm……are we still going to lynch Jerry?
Posted by pizzajohnny on August 28th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
I am as God fearing / worshiping / loving / adoring as any other Christian (I believe so anyway), and I thought the whole thing – except the Columbia Shuttle reference – was hilarious! Good, clean, intelligent. Loved it.
Posted by Rob J. on August 28th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
overall, brilliant.
tho, the columbia shuttle was not funny at all. it takes away from what was otherwise pure genius.
Posted by Mig on August 28th, 2010 at 7:34 pm
Gotta agree with those that commented on the Columbia reference. Pretty sick and wrong.
Fuck religion, that’s what it’s there for (to have the piss ripped outta it), but a terrible disaster like Columbia, should be left alone?!
Posted by ARandomKid on August 28th, 2010 at 8:09 pm
Well, my pastor enjoyed the God jokes, for all you extremely Christian folks on the comments up there.
Posted by Connor on August 28th, 2010 at 8:14 pm
These are great but the second one and the last ones are the best.
Funny stuff, every single bit of it……lighten up haters….
IF the Columbia part was so offensive, why not the Titanic? Those were people who died, too…….but again, some people lighten up and enjoy a laugh from time to time.
Posted by Sara on August 28th, 2010 at 10:14 pm
This was absolutely hilarious. And for the people complaining about the god issue, take the bible out of your ass for 5 fucking seconds and learn to laugh a little
Posted by JustMe on August 28th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
@ fugaisi you said that anyone reading this and commenting should be ashamed so…. I guess you should be ashamed too since you commented like way at the beginning lol. And for those that are offended by the God jokes??? this is why there is war, because some people just cannot relax and UNDERSTAND a simple joke. I thought it was hilarious.
Posted by hilz0r on August 29th, 2010 at 12:29 am
That, was unreal awesome haha!!
Posted by Jeff on August 29th, 2010 at 12:32 am
Don’t joke about things people worship? Really? This was great!
Posted by scotty on August 29th, 2010 at 12:38 am
brilliant stuff!! could have left the Columbia stuff out, but seriously .. laughed my ass off!
Posted by Sonai on August 29th, 2010 at 12:57 am
omg, this is INCREDIBLY hilarious. it was smart, and funny, and respectful to all except anyone effect by the Columbia Space Shuttle. So all of you fucking haters, have an open mind.
Posted by Rotkva on August 29th, 2010 at 7:30 am
The funniest parts are about God and the Church! Religion poisons everything as you people are proving with your comments every day. The biggest joke however is that in the 21st century still exist people like you that believe in bad bloodthirsty fairytales of a “perfect” childlike creature with sadistic tendencies called God to watch over you. (and by that I refer to the three desert dogmas- judaism, christianity and islam) To believe= not to think with your own head.
Posted by nothingissacred on August 29th, 2010 at 8:35 am
stop being a pansy everyone, nothing is sacred, it’s funny. get over yourselves, stop being so serious. ENJOY LIFE.
Posted by Lacey on August 29th, 2010 at 9:47 am
This is very funny…BUT…Darwin never said humans evolved from primates. Never, ever. In addition, humans didn’t evolve from primates – primates and humans share a common ancestor, which is a massive difference. Being educated makes you funnier!
Posted by ilywood on August 29th, 2010 at 11:52 am
this was absolutly outstanding! how to get this idea and publishing it, really awsome except one thing, there is some religious people believe in god so they should be respected and not playing tricks or making jokes about their toughts.
peace
Posted by tiff on August 29th, 2010 at 1:09 pm
okay besides the Columbia joke it was all funny and I ammm a Christian and proud of it…you want to hear the funny part…most Christians have sense of humors…why…because God does…also…I’m a fledging Environmental Science:Biology major with a History Minor…You know there is room it explore in the Christian religion…don’t judge all…not all of us judge you. (for one that’s a job I leave up for God…I’m too busy enjoying life…enjoying humor to do anything else…live your life…and quit judging others…no matter what side of the coin you’re on.)
Posted by negritude on August 29th, 2010 at 2:32 pm
classic
Posted by skkb on August 29th, 2010 at 3:52 pm
Brilliant except for the Columbia set
Posted by pokeurbiebfan on August 29th, 2010 at 4:11 pm
why the hell is there a union jack with england written next to it?
Posted by michael on August 29th, 2010 at 5:28 pm
this is absolutely innnapropriate. god is sacred and it is wrong to make jokes at his expense. the person who made this is probably jewish and probably doesnt care about the consequences since they dont believe in god. but even black people know that making fun of god is wrong.
Posted by Prof on August 29th, 2010 at 5:34 pm
I thought that this entire image was funny and was actually rather partial to the bit with the dinosaurs. That said, I think its far funnier that serious debate has ensued over minor grievances. Kudos to the artist who pulled this off.
Posted by funny_but on August 29th, 2010 at 5:41 pm
Fail on the timestamps. The posts implicate something happening a long ass time ago, but all the responses are from within the last few hours (except for the one with God).
I don’t think that’s quite how facebook statuses work.
Posted by Liesbet on August 29th, 2010 at 5:44 pm
I want to click the ‘Older posts’ button…
Posted by KLO on August 29th, 2010 at 8:04 pm
Awesome! Is there a program for this, or did you just photoshop it all?
All you guys that commented on the pic about me, suck it up! I thought it was hilarious! Get off my ass you crazy wannabees!
Posted by Lynxius on August 29th, 2010 at 8:50 pm
Excellent!! had a down right chuckle at this. Well done
Posted by faith chaney on August 29th, 2010 at 9:12 pm
im with the church!!!!!
Posted by Jared on August 29th, 2010 at 10:40 pm
Galileo actually didn’t figure out that things revolved around the sun. that was copernicus
Posted by Chloe on August 29th, 2010 at 11:38 pm
Props to who made this and if you’re offended… get off the internets.
Posted by dblchin on August 30th, 2010 at 12:22 am
OMG! TOTALLY HILARIOUS!!! I really dunno what to say BRO!
Posted by Ms Spyder on August 30th, 2010 at 6:40 am
This can only be considered offensive if you have no sense of humour. You should be able to laugh at your own beliefs as well as other people’s. The God one was more offensive to the organisation of the church than the actually religion itself. Oh lord save me from your followers springs to mind.
Posted by Wave on August 30th, 2010 at 3:48 pm
What’s up with all the hip-hop slang being bandied about with these historical events? Hip Hop has done little of a technical nature, really.
Posted by Jap Pantyhose Freak on August 30th, 2010 at 6:59 pm
Are you able to deliver 30 pairs of red and white seamed by 5pm friday. We have a party on…
Thanks;
JPF
Posted by Witqueen on August 30th, 2010 at 7:01 pm
Lordy People
It was the Challenger that blew up..not Columbia
*shakes head*
Posted by god on August 30th, 2010 at 7:53 pm
your right atheist these assholes are brainwashed hahaha
Posted by Mayra Castro on August 31st, 2010 at 12:06 am
why does everything have to be taken so seriously…
Posted by AsianParticipation on August 31st, 2010 at 12:12 am
Waaaaaaaiiiiit a minute here, are you f*ckheads REALLY defending the dignity of some mythical being named “God/Jesus/Holy Spirit” over that of a prominent former U.S. PRESIDENT?????!!!
If anyone is to be angry over ANY of this, which you shouldn’t because that’s the point of a joke/humor in general, it should be about the making fun of Lincoln and not GOD. Come on guys, we live in the internet era and we know enough that JESUS didn’t die for us to live, THE F***ING DINOSAURS DID. And please nobody start saying that God put the asteroid on course to Earth because that’s bullsh*t.
Posted by LouisZ on August 31st, 2010 at 1:25 am
I think its awesome that noone seems to be upset that the author makes fun of the church. So I guess its ok to make fun of the author, just not the star character.
Posted by :D on August 31st, 2010 at 2:55 am
Oh good, I am finally done reading the comments
Posted by Sjonnaaaaah on August 31st, 2010 at 7:33 am
great series, want more!
I liked the Julius Caesar one the best. Don’t be creepy dude LMAO
But i am very offended byt the Titanic one. You know, for me, Titanic and it’s story is a religion. So i don’t think you should be insulting someone’s religion, wether it is catholic, muslim, scientology or titanic. byt the way, dinosaurs never existed. their bones are all laid down by people who form a HUUUUGE conspiracy all over the world to bring down the Church. You know, the instance that follows Jesus by , for ages, giving ppl the choice: convert or die. Hmm, not so far away from nowadays muslims. Guess they should catch up in a few decades those 400 years they’re younger than christianity. Well, it’s normal to be harder to others than to yourself, so i cannot blame christians for weighing with two measures and weights…
Posted by Me on August 31st, 2010 at 8:22 am
Good stuff. Typical American cock-up though: that’s the British flag, not the English flag. Yes, there’s a difference
Posted by nick on August 31st, 2010 at 11:01 am
The God part was the best bit. Jees guys, harmless fun can be poked at anything. You’re on the path to being those “don’t draw the prophet in a cartoon” guys of christianity.
And anyhow, people believe in fairies. They have got just as much proof of them that you do of a God, so if you say a word against it…. you get the picture.
the funny part youre not getting…..THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS GOD!!!! so all you people that are PREACHING need to stfu!!! this is hilarious….ALL OF IT!!!
Posted by Parabola on August 31st, 2010 at 12:29 pm
Would people ever just fu*k off, it was funny and that’s that! Gods an(unprovable)opinion and historical fact is for history books, not fake facebook jokes! It was very creative Kudos to the creators.
Posted by Joey on August 31st, 2010 at 2:16 pm
Oooooooh get a sense of humour you religious nutters!! These are seriously funny!!
Posted by JMC on August 31st, 2010 at 2:20 pm
Witqueen, what world were you living in on February 1, 2003?
*shakes head*
I thought it was all pretty funny except for the Columbia one. That one was callous and not funny at all, especially to anyone who had friends or family on that shuttle. Can’t post on FB because of that one.
Posted by GrammyA on August 31st, 2010 at 3:33 pm
Very funny, except the Challenger. And who’s to say none of this could have happened if there had been facebook, except maybe the iceburg?
Posted by Caroline on August 31st, 2010 at 5:13 pm
@JustMe, you are an idiot for thinking @fugaisi was being serious.
Posted by Max Effort! on August 31st, 2010 at 6:46 pm
Meh. Read the comments first about how hilarious and offensive it was. Didn’t think it was either.
Posted by tori on August 31st, 2010 at 9:52 pm
very clever. i’m still laughing. more please.
Posted by kidt on September 1st, 2010 at 7:09 am
I like the asteroid part.. LOL
but it’s weird, the asteroid updated the status 65 mil years ago, but the dinosaurs commented several minutes ago. your’re too late t-rex! you are supposed to be fossils several minutes ago.. hahahaa.. who cares, it just a joke..
Posted by caludzoriginal on September 1st, 2010 at 9:54 am
Oh myy. hahahhaw as laughing my ass off! i love itt! good job. hope theres more. XD
Posted by Franklyn on September 1st, 2010 at 7:12 pm
Why is the Columbia unacceptable? Because you were alive to see it? Someone call the wambulance.
Posted by Evolushun on September 1st, 2010 at 7:51 pm
Evolution is a myth as well. Just so you know. Absolutely NO evidence to support the theory of evolution.
Quote: “Jerry was kinda right for the wrong reasons. The “creation” (copyright Judeo-Christain 3600 Bc) is mythical, not historical.”
Posted by drakpz on September 2nd, 2010 at 3:28 am
pure genius! go on!!! ROTFLMAO
Posted by Lala on September 2nd, 2010 at 8:03 am
This was just gold. Like, I mean intensely EPIC.
Posted by HistoryClubVP on September 2nd, 2010 at 9:29 am
I’m religious and I wasn’t offended by the God jokes. It’s not picking on Creationism. It’s just saying God’s thoughts during. That’s not bad, IMO. I mean, it wasn’t the funniest thing there, I chuckled a little, but I thought that Galileo & Darwin v. Church thing was hilarious. The only thing I didn’t really like was the Columbia one. First of all, it was the Challenger and second I don’t find the death of other people funny. :/ But other than that, totally awesome and nice job.
Posted by history on September 2nd, 2010 at 11:23 am
Ben Franklin never signed the Declaration of Independence. He’s probably just posing to look like the cool founding fathers.
Posted by Steve on September 2nd, 2010 at 12:43 pm
HistoryClubVP: Dude.. For a HistoryClubVP, check out your history.. Columbia blew up in 2003, Challenger blew up in 86.. If you are going to be mad about someones post, and start claiming it’s wrong, at least research your history..
Posted by Sarah on September 2nd, 2010 at 1:13 pm
He-LARIOUS! More, plese.
Posted by Dan Jor on September 2nd, 2010 at 2:46 pm
make like a group for the world wars or a un group
Posted by JesusDiesLOL on September 2nd, 2010 at 3:17 pm
i like the bit where god is ridiculed. you see, it’s funny because he’s not real.
Posted by Greg on September 2nd, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Does anyone know if there’s some kind of online generator where you could make your own Facebook things like these?
Posted by PingPong on September 2nd, 2010 at 5:57 pm
I effin LOVED it!!!!!
Religious folks….go die or something
Posted by QLAMA on September 2nd, 2010 at 6:32 pm
I PRAY THAT GOD FORGIVES US ALL…. AS WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE DOING///
Posted by Adam on September 3rd, 2010 at 12:20 am
Guys really? People are saying dont joke about god because it is offensive to religious people but guess what. Im an atheist and get offended when people TALK about god sonsidering i dont believe in him and i still laughed at this. Seriously guys get a sense of humor (people who didnt find that funny) Good job to the rest of you! This shit made me laugh my ass off. Especially john hancock’s pic
Posted by Ed on September 3rd, 2010 at 6:44 am
Very clever and well written.
Love pissing off those monotheistic hypocrites!!
Take your walls down and open your minds FFS!!
Would love to see more of this along the same vein…
Ed
Posted by Melisa on September 3rd, 2010 at 7:22 am
I loved ALL of it! People are so touchy about religion, there was nothing offensive about the cracks…relax already. The Columbia exploded, it is a fact…it is not the only one though. There was nothing in here to get offended about…RELAX and enjoy the humor. Abe and the box seats….loved it
Posted by j on September 3rd, 2010 at 7:32 am
@JErry, lets face it the church has f-ed up royally. Im a christian and I admit that, no way around it.
Posted by Lee on September 3rd, 2010 at 10:14 am
I’m a Christian and i found the whole thing hilarious!
Posted by FirstOfTenth on September 3rd, 2010 at 10:31 am
This page just made my day– what a great idea! “Catholic Church just posted the song We Didn’t Start The Fire”– hilarious
Just one question concerning the Ancient Asteroid: What does ‘FML’ mean?
Posted by Vanessa on September 3rd, 2010 at 12:30 pm
I hate Face Book…But this is funny as Hell!!!
Posted by Diane on September 3rd, 2010 at 12:46 pm
Not only did I love the jokes (except the Shuttle one) I loved reading all the comments. Thanks for the laughter you funny people. Most of you helped restore my faith in the future of our country. I hope all you smart people are registered to vote. It’s so easy to do.
Posted by digginestdogg on September 3rd, 2010 at 12:47 pm
Very funny. Even the myopically Judeo-Christian god bit. ever notice the religious people who are offended do so because deep down they doubt their faith and so get angry when someone reminds them of that doubt. People confident in their beliefs would ignore anything counter to them. Personally, I find great humor in poking fun at poorly-constructed medieval superstitions that defy science and common sense.
Posted by rdecoene on September 3rd, 2010 at 1:23 pm
this is really nice done.
Very original!
Posted by Ann on September 3rd, 2010 at 2:24 pm
Hilarious!! I loved it! ESPECIALLY the religious ones! Damn straight!
Posted by Whopper Jr on September 3rd, 2010 at 4:52 pm
They were all funny. @Bible thumpers, pull the stick out of your ass. Oh, and God doesn’t actually exist, these facebook posts were actually done by normal people.
/sarcasm
Posted by bassitone on September 3rd, 2010 at 5:08 pm
We need more of these!
Posted by John on September 3rd, 2010 at 5:14 pm
That is what i call hillarious
Posted by Gabby on September 3rd, 2010 at 10:44 pm
this is what i call dumb
the titanic one, especially unimaginative and stupid
what fun yeah
(yawns)
Posted by sarah on September 3rd, 2010 at 11:06 pm
speaking of “unrespectable,” Human, your grammar is appalling. god did not create “Human” to be so ignorant.
Posted by Diane on September 4th, 2010 at 9:06 am
To FIRSTOFTENTH, I had to ask my hip niece what FML was. It means fuc* my life. Kids these days are strange but they’re so funny, too.
Posted by khornby on September 4th, 2010 at 9:17 am
You know what makes it funny…is it pokes fun at each of us who insist on providing a status of our own mundane and boring lives just so we can be seen and heard
I did find it amusing
Posted by sain cristian on September 4th, 2010 at 11:02 am
lol that was funny as hell…. btw i love dinos and i hate the church…. im a bad man… oh nooo…. im going to hell… whis comming with me???:D
Posted by Jason on September 4th, 2010 at 12:50 pm
I want more!!!! These are some of the funniest things I’ve ever seen!!!
Posted by Tessa on September 4th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
This is Kickin’ effin sweeeet!
Posted by Bubba on September 4th, 2010 at 2:39 pm
Redcoats? More DICKcoats. Amiright?
Posted by Bubba on September 4th, 2010 at 2:39 pm
That was awesome!!
Posted by Meer on September 4th, 2010 at 4:28 pm
HAHAHAH! tht god shit was funny as shit so was the lincoln shit fucking epic they need more of these
I totally agree 110% with Sam on this.
100% original. creative all the way through and very funny.
Posted by Jack on September 5th, 2010 at 6:12 am
If your going to make fun of God, then you should throw in a couple more Gods. Allah, Buddha, Hades and so on. But messing with God to me is sacrilegious, I do not find it offensive just hard to read.
Posted by Yohoehoe on September 5th, 2010 at 8:26 am
THE EIGHT I’D REALLY RATHER YOU DIDN’TS
1.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Act Like A Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don’t Believe In Me, That’s Okay. Really, I’m Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn’t About Them So Don’t Change The Subject.
2.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjigate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Dont Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This Through You Thick Heads: Woman=Person, Man=Person. Samey-Samey. One is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We’re Talking About Fashion And I’m Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal And Fuchsia.
4.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go F*** Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off The TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
5.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The B*******.
6.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Build MultiMillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/ Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick): A. Ending Poverty B. Curing Diseases C. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable. I Might Be A Complex Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM The Creator.
7.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Go around Telling People I Talk To you. You’re Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can’t You Take A Hint?
8.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses Alot Of Leather/Lubrication/Las Vegas. If The Other Person Is Into It However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear A CONDOM! Honestly It’s A Piece Of Rubber, If I Didn’t Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.
Posted by icarus on September 5th, 2010 at 5:18 pm
Posted by thatonechick on September 6th, 2010 at 1:47 am
Ugh who cares that they made a joke about god? I’m catholic and I thought it was hilarious!!! XD
Posted by Hussien on September 6th, 2010 at 4:10 pm
I’m Muslim and found the whole God stuff funny as hell! I would love to see more of it to be honest
Posted by QQfest on September 7th, 2010 at 12:23 am
QQ they made a joke about my religion! It’s only okay if it’s not my religion! QQ
Posted by Subu on September 7th, 2010 at 3:22 am
good stuff. but ‘Titantic’ spelling fail.
Posted by Jesse on September 7th, 2010 at 10:32 am
Ok. I’ll admit I’m usually kinda touchy about religious jokes. Can’t help it. But there was nothing even offensive about this. I mean, yeah, they rip on “The Church”. “The Church” is people. People screw up and do stupid things and sometimes deserve to be made fun of for it. Plus, those status comments reflect the way “The Church” actually reacted according to history.
On a lighter note.
“Don’t worry Dad. I got this.”
Awesome.
Posted by Anna on September 7th, 2010 at 9:46 pm
I dunno who Jerry’s God is but mine has a sense of humour. I bet He wishes he invented facebook instead of the universe, would have made more money and he could have rested after the first day.
Posted by (NTT)2 on September 8th, 2010 at 1:11 pm
=)). Cool cool =))
Posted by GSimmons on September 8th, 2010 at 2:01 pm
Columbia stuff is simply not appropriate. Abe Lincoln also questionable.
I’ve seen stuff like this before and yes, it can be quite funny, but resorting to exploiting real human tragedies is in poor taste.
Posted by d on September 8th, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I don’t understand where people get off on drawing a “line” on humor… either something is “funny” to them, or it’s not. The reason the Columbia joke isn’t funny is that it doesn’t make sense, you knuckleheads… it blew up on takeoff, not reentering the atmosphere. Sometimes things are funny to folks BECAUSE it pisses other people off. Get over it. Abe Lincoln stuff is hysterical.
Posted by Awesomeistic on September 8th, 2010 at 7:23 pm
you guys gotta lighten up. -_- that was HILARIOUS little mean on the Colombia one but aside for that it was AWESOME XD
ANCIENT ASTEROID FTW
Posted by Kel on September 9th, 2010 at 12:11 am
they were all very funny (part 2 ones as well) loved all of them accept Columbia…too recent and simply wrong info…make more…but please none about 9/11!
Posted by AnotherOneBitesTheDust on September 9th, 2010 at 1:55 am
I see the guys point, but seriously people, laugh or a tear? Plus, this shit happened ages ago. When I eventually die, I’d rather have people laughing at my memory than crying over it. Shit happens, life’s a bitch and then you die, make sure you have a few laughs along the way, at anyone’s expense.
Posted by Undead Ghost on September 9th, 2010 at 2:29 am
For those of you who don’t have a sense of humor, why are you even reading this? This is made for people who can appreciate anything.
Posted by grz on September 9th, 2010 at 6:57 am
jokes were awesome and creative. waiting for more…
also i don’t understand why religious people are in need of defending God. If he exists then he would have known these jokes were coming long before the world existed (You’re familiar with the “all knowing” concept, yes?). And don’t worry, these jokes wouldn’t hurt anything divine.
Posted by The Rev on September 9th, 2010 at 9:31 am
Funny idea but the actual wording of the updates read like they were written by a junior high school kid.
A bit more wit and a bit less immaturity would make this much better.
Posted by Ellen on September 9th, 2010 at 10:56 am
@Human WTF is unrespectable? I’m guessing you didn’t get past third grade, and that’s being generous.
Posted by Ruth on September 9th, 2010 at 9:04 pm
WHO CARES!??!?!?!?! I believe in God and I didn’t find it offensive. Seriously…those of you who DONT believe take more offense from it then I did. Get over yourself.
Posted by Alice on September 9th, 2010 at 9:29 pm
can’t we all just get along?
Posted by shannon on September 10th, 2010 at 9:39 am
right cant make fun of God! we all know that he or Jesus do not have a sense of humor! really people its a FREAKING JOKE!!!! im sure if God saw that he would be laughing!
Posted by Victoria Alexis on September 10th, 2010 at 10:41 am
HILARIOUS Its just some fun, relax guys – PEACE AND LOVE ♥
Posted by Henning on September 10th, 2010 at 1:14 pm
- Columbus, natives, ect
- Maybe even Some Hitler and Stalin action
Posted by lisap on September 10th, 2010 at 11:52 pm
this. is. awesome.
Posted by astcell on September 12th, 2010 at 12:56 am
It’s ETC not ECT dumbass.
Great fun in there, even loved the religion ones. Gotta have a laugh and if you cannot laugh at yourself then you need a drink
Posted by Aina on September 12th, 2010 at 2:21 am
I salute the person who did this.. This is grand! Apologies to those who were offended, but c’mon.. Isn’t this funny?
Loved the Julius Caesar part!
Posted by Kevin on September 12th, 2010 at 4:25 pm
the funny thing is with all these people claiming disrespect about the religious ones, they’re usually the ones to turn around and bash someone elses beliefs.
ps. Galileo was right, the church treated him like crap and apologized later when it was proven about 350 years later.
Posted by Julia on September 12th, 2010 at 9:56 pm
Loved this, so funny.
There were a few innapropriate things, but innapropriate has a tendency to be hilarious!
I think it’s hilarious that the people who are getting upset at the religous people don’t realized they’re doing the exact same thing as they are
Posted by whoever on September 12th, 2010 at 10:04 pm
Rev – the sophmoric humor is a jab at Facebook followers and popular culture. It’s not a lack of wit, that IS the wit. Having Great John Adams say “bring it” is too damn funny. And for the God crowd, I think the jokes are a great opportunity for human introspection and self awareness, which is what a great joke is all about, laughing at ourselves.
Posted by Sam on September 13th, 2010 at 7:24 am
Epic work people…God just gave me a buzz on my mobile and he said he frikkin loved it…that settles it, the good lord approves.
Posted by Lauz on September 13th, 2010 at 7:40 am
God is my boyfriend…..
Posted by Tatiana on September 13th, 2010 at 8:40 am
You should do something that shows off how STUPID people become when something messes with their religion….
Come on guys – this is AWESOME!!!!
Posted by Woot on September 13th, 2010 at 11:36 am
I don’t care who ya are…that funny rite there!
Posted by Ronbo on September 13th, 2010 at 1:34 pm
Funny except for the Columbia shuttle – seven great people died trying to advance our knowledge and inspire kids to become scientists and engineers. Pretty mean to make fun of that, those people were heroes.
[...] If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses – Part 2 MORE: The Roundup Humor Features [...]
Posted by Kareen on September 14th, 2010 at 7:51 pm
This is just plain humor…so get over yourselves! Why does everything have to be dissected. Laugh at the funny parts and ignore the parts you didn’t care for. I would love to see more of this, even a book. You could go on and on.
Posted by soasertsus on September 15th, 2010 at 12:18 am
Brilliant, simply brilliant.
Posted by Dani on September 15th, 2010 at 6:58 am
Awesome! Well done Wylo! Loved it and the second one. Can you do more?
Posted by Chase on September 15th, 2010 at 7:50 am
Those were great. I’m requesting a World Trade Center one.
Posted by J on September 15th, 2010 at 1:11 pm
This was great!!! Gonna be usin it for a class project.. Coming soon to Facebook itself!!! Halarious.
Posted by Joe Amargo on September 15th, 2010 at 3:16 pm
nice nice!! very hillarious!
Posted by Diane on September 16th, 2010 at 1:14 am
I am a Christian, and I found everything in this funny, expect for the reference to the Columbia space shuttle, which I found to be in poor taste. Simply a bad judgment call that it was included, but the “religious” stuff is funny because it reflects what the church has gone through in its history. And if the church can’t laugh at itself, then that’s a shame.
Posted by Li Nguyen on September 16th, 2010 at 8:13 am
Wonderful.
Posted by Zampen on September 16th, 2010 at 1:21 pm
Hahahaaaaaaaaaaaa funniest shit in a long time !!!!!!
Posted by Maikeru Kuchiki on September 16th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
@Jerry Who so butthurt? Get over it. It’s hilarious. Heck, God would think it’s hilarious too.
Posted by suckhole on September 16th, 2010 at 3:31 pm
Awesome. Too bad there is no such thing as a Brontosaurus. It’s an Apatosaurus.
Posted by The Lord God Almighty on September 16th, 2010 at 4:28 pm
I thought that shit was hilarious. No offense taken.
Posted by MaddieG on September 16th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
GENIUS!! i havent laughed that hard for a long time!! JESUS: Dad, i got this– and “john wilkes booth likes this” has me dying lmfao!
Posted by Frank on September 16th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
An observation about the church that shows up in two of the posts in the article (Galileo and Darwin). In those times the Church exercised their dogma publicly, which is why we know these men whose freethinking views were controversial. Today, the same dogma (forget the church but considering others) is not manifested publicly but in duplicitous manners, which not only stale progress, as the Church did in those days, but indecently victimize the same types of people. The same types of freethinking people who moved the world ahead as needed, Galileo and Darwin, to name only two. To try to say anything to the contrary, identifies one speaking as the dogmatic close-minded type who prevents needed change. Oh, but that’s why they probably don’t speak publicly. Everyone would see their ineptness.
Posted by God on September 16th, 2010 at 5:50 pm
Don’t worry guys, I thought it was class.
Posted by VV on September 16th, 2010 at 11:27 pm
everything was hilarious although i do think the columbia joke was a bit too much. those people didnt think it was funny they were about to die. nonetheless good job you should make a book.
Posted by DrMooseknuckle on September 17th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
The only thing that was wrong with the Columbia joke is that it exploded LEAVING the earth, not reentering the earth’s atmosphere.
Posted by Gabrielle on September 18th, 2010 at 9:56 pm
Now if Hitler had status updates…those might be offensive. Just a tad.
Unless it was “Nein! Nein! Nein! I’m getting sick of this damn bunker. Fucking commies.”
Posted by JackLightningrod on September 19th, 2010 at 11:18 am
The only thing that was wrong with that statement is that the Challenger exploded leaving the Earth. Columbia disintegrated reentering the atmosphere.
Posted by Jack's retarded on September 20th, 2010 at 7:41 am
Read it again dude, “entering back into earth’s atmosphere the homecoming party’s gonna be awesome.
—loved the Church parts.
Posted by Alphabetix on September 20th, 2010 at 9:43 pm
Great list. Ha!
Posted by Gina on September 20th, 2010 at 10:00 pm
Too damn funny.
Posted by Andrea on September 21st, 2010 at 12:54 am
i love the cockroaches.
Posted by Andrea on September 21st, 2010 at 12:56 am
…there’s no such thing as a Brontosaurus? Here when I thought I knew my dino names! ha.
Posted by jordan on September 21st, 2010 at 12:20 pm
ha i like how i pressed older posts thinking there would be more
Posted by talktothehandroid on September 21st, 2010 at 9:28 pm
FUCK YEAH!@!
Posted by gümüş alyans on September 22nd, 2010 at 11:41 pm
can you do the same with fictional characters? “it’s a trap”. got the quote? (giant squidhead)
Posted by Ray on September 23rd, 2010 at 2:41 am
How can I contact the person who wrote this, and tell them that I think these are HILARIOUS and as a history teacher I want to know how to make them so I can have my students make them for assignments. I agree I’m not that into the sad ones, but the Noah’s Ark OMG amiright. aiiii….
Posted by Lila on September 24th, 2010 at 3:47 pm
Also, instead of cockroach at the end of the meteor status, probably should’ve been a rat, a mouse, or some small rodent.
Uhhh the reason that it said roaches is that scientifically they would be the only living thing to survive if an atom bomb destroyed the Earth. Didn’t anyone see the scientific angle to the religious joking? I find THAT very funny!! LOL
Posted by nina on September 25th, 2010 at 12:50 am
Oh my sheeeesshhh, this is entirely tooooo funny, like I saw it earlier today then i had to look at it again ! (: haaaa woooooww
Posted by John on September 25th, 2010 at 2:31 pm
But he’s not really making fun of god!! its not excatly wat happend but still adam and eve made sin and jesus fixed it
Ok, I’m an Athiest, but I’ll step over the line and argue a few facts for you “religious” people. Your “God” created everything, yes? Wouldn’t that mean that he also created “Humor”? Oh, why yes it would! Also, how is that disrespectful? The only thing God said was “Can’t teach these kids anything”, it wasn’t like they had him swearing excessively in there right?
Get a life bible thumpers, get your heads out of your ass.
Posted by joey on September 26th, 2010 at 4:29 am
HEY LEAVE US ALONE I LOVE THE BIBLE AND GOD
Posted by joey on September 26th, 2010 at 4:31 am
oh, wait, no i don’t.
all you people complaining about the god jokes and that really should grow up, they weren’t even offensive!
they were all fact!
Posted by noname on September 26th, 2010 at 9:39 am
funny stuff, but when I got to Columbia Space Shuttle I had a really grim feeling, still I have to give you credits for making even sinister jokes quite funny. As for the God part the most hilarious thing I find in it, it’s the part where the Church likes the Original Sin.
Posted by Vocany on September 26th, 2010 at 9:56 pm
What software was used to make this, i want to do one.
Posted by I am God on September 27th, 2010 at 3:19 pm
alli have to ssay is that all you silly christians are the equivilant to closeted homosexuals. Run and tell dat ! Home boy!
Posted by avisioncame on September 27th, 2010 at 9:29 pm
If I have to see this stupid fucking thing one more time…
Posted by Vincent van Gogh on September 28th, 2010 at 2:33 pm
I thought all of them were funny except the Columbia one … and guess what I am a Christian, the God one’s those were funny. My historical status would be something along the lines of : decided to cut my ear off today, it just didn’t feel right.
Posted by Dave on September 28th, 2010 at 7:15 pm
anyone who thinks any part of this isnt humerous needs to lighten up!
i see lots offended by the space shuttle, but no one offended by the Titanic huh? many many MANY more died in that catastrophe……
That said, again, lighten up if this offends you
Posted by iBoL on September 29th, 2010 at 4:32 am
I notice an interesting parallel:
Those that take offense to the referred “God Jokes” and the attitude of “The Church”.
Oh boy, the things that make ya go “Hmmmm…”
Take it for what it IS people, don’t make it what it AIN’T …
Cuz sometimes … it just REALLY AIN’T.
Ignorance is NOT bliss, it’s naivety.
The harder you make it to learn your mistakes the easier it is to teach your mistakes … and THAT! kids, is why the world is sooo F’d up!
LOL 8-]
Posted by smee on September 30th, 2010 at 11:08 pm
MOOOOOOOOOOOORE
Posted by Rachel on October 2nd, 2010 at 1:43 am
This was hilarious, and from a very religious person, I am sure God has a sense of humor too. I am sure he would laugh. He created all including humor.
Posted by Amber on October 2nd, 2010 at 4:58 pm
Yeeeeeeaaaaaahhhh . . . last I checked, God had a sense of humor, unless you think Darwin is partially right and that quality just evolved in some people? Clearly not in you? God+funny doesn’t=heresy. I happen to think it’s funny AND accurate, if you read it again with your head on your shoulders this time you might agree . . . I highly doubt God would take offense to that little joke . . .
Posted by Clement on October 3rd, 2010 at 1:23 pm
Relax dudes…God jokes are funny. I agree the man up there has a sense of humour too
But I have to admit that Christians have a pretty good reason to be upset. It just seems that nowadays , in the field of monotheistic religions, everyone can poke fun (even to the offensive extremes) about the Judeo-Christian God, but if the joke was about the Muslims or Islam, it would be immediately taken down and a formal apology would have to be issued.
Such double standards. Tsk. If you want to offend one, why can’t you offend the other? What’s the point in crying for peace and religious equality if by that definition it means a bashing of someone else’s beliefs?
That being said, I think the reason the author only focused on the Christian/Jewish God was because it’s coming from a Western perspective. If it came from Russia, there would be Stalin/Communist jokes; and if it came from China, there would be Confucius/Tang Dynasty jokes, etc.
Comedy has a great potential for unifying everyone. Seriously, the world would be a better place if more people had a sense of humour.
Just my two cents.
Posted by Canuckbasterd on October 3rd, 2010 at 3:54 pm
Lollercopter ! Too funny all of it.
And to everyone who takes offence to the god stuff need I remind you … ” If thine eye offends thee, pluck it out! “
Posted by ailurafil on October 3rd, 2010 at 4:18 pm
Loved it! Definitely would love to see more!!
Posted by Grimn on October 4th, 2010 at 10:43 am
AWESOME STUFF!!! LOL!!! Keep em’ comin!!!
Posted by Bahahaha on October 4th, 2010 at 3:41 pm
OMG! I laughed hysterically! As someone who majored in history, this was just over the top hilarious with the innuendos!
And I agree… the John Hancock picture had me rolling!
Please give us more! This is quite possibly funnier than FU Penguin!
Posted by gracieboo on October 4th, 2010 at 5:13 pm
I’m a Christian and the only offensive thing I found was the Columbia bit.
On the other hand, I LOVED that Copernicus “liked” Galileo’s status. Hilarious!
Posted by Anonym0us on October 4th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
“And I do believe that God likes humor….sorry, but I don’t think he wants us to be sulking around Earth for our lives having no fun”
Posted by dr.sci - fi on October 5th, 2010 at 8:43 am
the whole world needs a enama !!!!!!!!!!!!!lmassoff!!!
Posted by dr.sci - fi on October 5th, 2010 at 8:44 am
scotty beam up ..lolol
Posted by Jane on October 5th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
Let’s just relax and laugh at a joke… No arguing about beliefs, it’s a losing battle and no one will change their mind.
Posted by humorAholic on October 5th, 2010 at 10:20 pm
keep it going & publish it ………”rap humor”
Posted by God on October 6th, 2010 at 9:41 am
Don’t tune me! I will send you to hell, you heathens.
Bow down to me and me only. Do as I say, not as I do. Everyone who commented here is destined for a lifetime of unhappiness.
Sincerely
God
Posted by kristin on October 6th, 2010 at 10:14 am
I love how this just shows our history is a history of men.
Posted by Goldenboy on October 6th, 2010 at 2:56 pm
This was hilarious. I am Christian and I thought the God part, especially the part about buddy Jesus having this one(original sin) was the best. It was respectful, theologically accurate and ROFL funny. Please all of the politically correct vegetables getting offended for other people shut it. You give other groups that don’t have a stick up there butts like you do a bad name.
Posted by Tony on October 7th, 2010 at 5:17 am
Eh, mildly funny… I am a Christian and I did not find the God jokes offensive, just not incredibly witty. I think they could’ve done a lot better with such a goldmine of material. The Colbert Report and Daily Show are ten times funnier. Not being a hater, just keepin’ it real. And to all fellow religious practitioners, I think it’s important to have a sense of humor even about the so-called “sacrosanct”. After all, nowhere in the Bible does it say that God didn’t have a sense of humor…
Posted by Tony on October 7th, 2010 at 5:56 am
The Julius Caesar one was pretty funny, but the rest were only mildly amusing. I am a Christian and I did not find the God jokes offensive at all; they just weren’t incredibly witty either. I think they could’ve done a lot better with such a goldmine of material. The Colbert Report and Daily Show are ten times funnier. Not being a hater, just keepin’ it real. On a separate note, to all fellow religious practitioners out there, I think it’s important to have a sense of humor even about that which we regard as sacrosanct. After all, nowhere in the Bible does it say that God doesn’t have a sense of humor. The ability to offend is granted by the offended. Plain and simple.
Posted by Steamdude on October 7th, 2010 at 4:53 pm
Too soon for the Columbia disaster.
Knocking God and religion? Right on!
People that take their religion (any religion) THAT seriously are part of the problem, not part of the solution.
Posted by Mei on October 7th, 2010 at 5:01 pm
This made my day! Stfu about religion no one cares. It’s funny get over it.
Posted by Facebook User on October 8th, 2010 at 3:56 pm
The Pioneers are at the Snake River crossing on the Oregon Trail.
Indian: Need a hand?
Zeke: Nah, we can totally ford the river.
Oxen: mmmmoooooooOOOOOOOO?????!!
Oxen and Zeke have drown.
Mary is attending “Zeke and Oxen memorial service”.
Posted by Alice on October 8th, 2010 at 11:32 pm
OMG GUYZZZZ LETS GO BURN KORANZZZZ!!! just kidding.
eat my socks you hypocrites. and get a sense of humor while you’re at it. and stop being jerks. You think you own the world. get a life and go away if you don’t like it. and stop ruining jokes that some people actually enjoy. oh yea, I forgot that you OWNED THE WORLD AND NO ONE ELSE MATTERS BUT YOUR PETTY RELIGION.
Posted by Alice on October 8th, 2010 at 11:35 pm
oh yea and to the Catholics that aren’t extremists and hypocrites, I LOVE YOU. You haven’t ruined religion through ignorance, and you have good senses of humor too. =D Peace out and keep on laughing!
Posted by .... on October 9th, 2010 at 1:26 pm
@Wiggidy, you’re a son of a bitch you know that??
Posted by Alex Mu on October 9th, 2010 at 10:10 pm
chill out guys about the god thing.
Posted by BigBlue on October 10th, 2010 at 6:35 am
The attacks on the Church are historically inaccurate. The Catholic Church is not full of homosexuals, for one. And while they disagreed with Galileo, they did so because a good portion of the world and their rulers did too. It was a new discovery. Lastly, Darwin’s theory is just that- still isn’t proved. The Church rightly disagrees with this because there is no scientific evidence to prove it as a fact. The Church proclaims that science comes from God and is good. Evolution, just like global warming theory, isn’t science.
The space shuttle joke was bad too. Wasn’t funny in the least.
Posted by cthulu on October 11th, 2010 at 12:01 am
@bigblue actually, there is substantial proof that evolution is fact. google search it. not difficult. also, still isn’t PROVEN, not proved.
Posted by madara on October 11th, 2010 at 12:32 am
I’ve been a Christian all my life (except, some might consider, when I reevaluated my beliefs several times and sort of “became” an atheist for a bit, but ultimately decided that the empirical extrabiblical evidence for God clearly and blatantly overwhelmed the evidence and arguments against it, though it is arguable about whether, from a Christian viewpoint, someone can be a Christian and then become “unsaved”) and I thought all of the jokes were hilarious, especially the God ones. I have always considered myself a bit abnormal because I am amused by antichristian material (like nonstampcollector and darkmatter), but that’s just the way that God made me imo.
Posted by Mike on October 11th, 2010 at 1:31 am
You religious freaks need to lighten the hell up. If you can’t laugh about religion then you’re way too anal and in dire need of a colonic.
Posted by frank on October 11th, 2010 at 7:16 am
BigBlue – if you believe the Church threatened an 80 year old Galileo with torture because other people thought the universe revolved around us you must not know much about the RCC & their dark ages.
Oh! And there it is! You know ZERO about science too! Look up the word theory and read ALL the definitions, not just the first one. There is a “theory of gravity” too but few of the same zealots pretend it is unproven. There is ample evidence of evolution.
You are right about the RCC not being full of Homosexuals though – priests have raped little girls, and a few have even violated grown up ones.
Posted by Kal-El on October 11th, 2010 at 10:38 am
Actually, the Church ordered Gallileo to house arrest for the rest of his life, this meant that food and supplies were sent to a house outside of the city, where he could complete his studies, observations, and experiments until the day he died (which was about three of four years)
Posted by Reah on October 11th, 2010 at 11:45 pm
I am a Christian, and I think the God jokes were funny. =)
Posted by Robert on October 13th, 2010 at 9:53 am
This was funny ill admit, but you see how ignorant people are through about 90% of these comments
Posted by Marcio on October 13th, 2010 at 10:31 am
9/11!!! 9/11!!! :p
Posted by Manny on October 14th, 2010 at 3:14 am
May I recommend you religious-heads some George Carlin material? Funny stuff though xD. Love the meteor one.
Posted by Shmikey on October 14th, 2010 at 9:39 am
Too bad there isn’t a button on SU that says: [I LOVE THIS!!!!].
Most inventive thing I’ve seen yet… I plan on sharing/forwarding this to as many pesky creationists that I can think of!
Posted by Lorraine8 on October 14th, 2010 at 10:47 am
This is crazy staff LOL
Posted by Cav on October 14th, 2010 at 11:02 am
You’re all idiots. This is hilarious!
Posted by faye on October 14th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
this needs to be in the classroom. seriously. its sad, but the kids would get it and be interested in history.
btw i laughed the entire thing. i think the God stuff was pushed a little, but still funny. it didnt denounce him just made light of it. people, dont take things so seriously. If you believe in God than pray for the peoples salvation and move on. What is the good in going nuts on a thing online?
Posted by Bane on October 14th, 2010 at 1:54 pm
You had me until “6000 years ago”
Posted by yuka on October 14th, 2010 at 3:40 pm
Im a christian and I liked all the jokes its funny its humor and the columbia thing well its funny but the american ego goes aflamin when you see one of your mayor failures and the douche who said religion flies you in to a building but science flies you to the moon i lough at your attempt on being smart but the religion is more believable than the moon landing stupid american -.-
Posted by becky on October 15th, 2010 at 10:55 pm
The Columbia one bothered me a tiny bit, but I’m old enough to remember seeing the Challenger blow up. Under the event, Original Sin, Jesus’ comment is “I got this one.” Wow folks, take away the sarcasm and you have the core belief of Christianity. So I’m not gonna cry “foul.” (Not that I would anyway.)
Posted by Vampire Daze on October 18th, 2010 at 5:44 am
Funny until Challenger. That was in extremely poor taste given the families of these people are still alive.
And Marcio, you are a dick!
Posted by Daaaave on October 18th, 2010 at 6:10 pm
Lol, people complaining about god jokes, here’s a good one.
2 guys walk into a bar, and one of them was God, and he was like, “hey bro, wassup?” and I was like “I’m out” and then I went and raped his Mum olololol.
Posted by Robin on October 19th, 2010 at 8:35 am
except for the columbia space shuttle..very funny
Posted by the dog on October 20th, 2010 at 5:21 am
Very funny-I shall be ripping this off,I mean paying homage or doing a tribute.I’m a gospel wallopper and I liked the God comments.You yanks are supposed to be having a global bash at religious absolutism in the wider world but for most of you you don’t have to leave the street you live in
Posted by Dmonet on October 20th, 2010 at 8:16 am
Seriously this is AWESOME! Whoever did this did a grt job!
& if you’re going to take exception with the Challenger bit, you should also take exception with the Vesuvius, Titanic and the Native American (Thanksgiving & Cortez)… These are just jokes… lighten up!
The God jokes are also GREAT! Seriously, you’re worried about getting in trouble with God?? What does that even mean??
God doesn’t have an ego!
Posted by Dmonet on October 20th, 2010 at 9:04 am
Ok, the Hellen Keller bit was kinda messed up, but funny!
Posted by einstien on October 21st, 2010 at 2:17 am
there is no such thing as a brontosaurus. look it up.
Posted by coolguy on October 21st, 2010 at 5:05 pm
JFK: Dallas is beautiful this time of year, I think we’ll take the convertible….
Oswald: Yeah, take in the sun and drive slow it’s good for scanning the crowd for chicks
Challenger: Kind of rough on the lift off kids, better put the ‘no smoking’ light on
Sally Ride: Hey, what’s this red button do?????
Houston: DON’T PU……dammit. Well, there’s always the Columbia…….
John Lennon: I’d love to sign you book. Yoko get the hell out of the way I have fans you know.
Chapman: Sorry America I only had 6 bullets and that Yoko was a quick little monkey!
Posted by Megan on October 22nd, 2010 at 1:42 pm
HAHAHAHHAHAAH
Posted by chelso on October 22nd, 2010 at 8:00 pm
haha. BRONTOSAURUS’S EXISTED,fuck you einstien.
p.s. you spelled your name wrong.
Posted by iooisdf on October 24th, 2010 at 4:13 pm
I knew that once people were saying that the “God jokes” were offensive, that some lame atheist would come around and start up an argument. I swear, that’s all they do. Atheists just sit at their monitors and unload on Christians because they actually choose to live life to the fullest…gets me every time.
Posted by Ashlie on October 30th, 2010 at 11:05 pm
I’m a Christian and I found the God jokes to be funny, but I still hold the same respect for my God. I don’t think God would’ve given us senses of humor if He didn’t have one Himself since He created us in His image. Just sayin. Nice one. I thought the whole thing was pretty neat. Funny and Cute because everyone is Facebook crazed.
Posted by Grammar police on October 31st, 2010 at 10:55 pm
@Human: unrespectable is not a word -_-
Posted by Kris on November 1st, 2010 at 11:51 pm
I LOVE God with all my heart, but this sh** was hilarious! I pray and I attend chruch but I really don’t find this offensive. I don’t see myself as any less christian-catholic because I laugh at this every single time i see it, hah.. What the hell, God would probably laugh at it himself.. “those funny little human beings, man i did a good job..” But hey, I get where people are coming from and if somebody finds those comments offensive, then they do, and there is nothing we can say to change that. Everybody looks differently at things and someone might be more sensitive when it comes to religion, respect that.. But anyways, whoever did this is funny as f***!!!! good job!! hahha
Posted by Sam on November 2nd, 2010 at 1:33 pm
Fantastic. had me in stitches. Sad it was so short would really make a great book. however reading all the comments from the people offended by the religious comments is equally amusing!
Posted by dukeeeeee on November 2nd, 2010 at 9:10 pm
hahahahah “unrespectable” classic… and im a christian too and i thought all of the posts were great, being christian has nothing to do w it. yall are just up tight… get a sense of humor and stop crying bc ppl make fun of us
Posted by Alice on November 4th, 2010 at 12:29 am
lmao. this is great.
Posted by kizzy on November 4th, 2010 at 4:03 pm
is that supposed 2 b funy? all i saw was swering and insulting religious people (me). sorry 2 bring the party down but i didnt lik it.
Posted by Me on November 5th, 2010 at 3:05 pm
The absolute funniest thing I’ve seen in a while – This made my day!
Posted by becki'sdad on November 6th, 2010 at 8:43 am
whatev
Posted by Fizzninja on November 6th, 2010 at 9:52 am
“I knew that once people were saying that the “God jokes” were offensive, that some lame atheist would come around and start up an argument. I swear, that’s all they do. Atheists just sit at their monitors and unload on Christians because they actually choose to live life to the fullest…gets me every time.”
Yep. Christians sure do live their lives to the fullest. They have no restrictions or rules or anything to live with, or anything like that. No sir. Nope. There’s nobody telling them to live a certain way or burn in Hell for the rest of eternity. Nuh-uh. Not at all.
Posted by Flumeghost on November 6th, 2010 at 11:29 pm
I’m Christian and I thought the god part was hilarious, lol. The Colombia thing, too soon.
Posted by ThisChristianChick on November 10th, 2010 at 6:53 pm
I thought this was heelarious! Even if us Christians aren’t known for our stellar sense of humour… Sad day. And since God created this whole “sense of humour” thingamajig, you’d think we’d be embracing it a bit more.
I felt more guilty about laughing at the Columbia one then about the church or God ones. And personally, I felt like the insults were actually aimed more at the church than God anyways. It’s funny! Laugh! Or at least suck it up and don’t complain about it.
Posted by Trollbob on November 10th, 2010 at 11:23 pm
really great stuff – don’t make a religion discusion. have a smile and love the life
Now that was hilarious.
Titantic?
I think what pretty much made this for me was John Hancock’s pic.
hilarious!
liked the asteroid and god stuff
The party pooper. Never fails. GTFO.
@Jerry BUTTHURT BAAAWWWWW!! Should we call you the WHAAAAAmbulance?
i hated it to end… it’d make a fun book
Nice sense of Humour Jerry. Go worship someone in your little corner, little slave.
Jerry, go in your room!!!
This was funny until you got to the God part. Totally not funny anymore. Make fun of things that people don’t worship. you ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
Awesome status updates, haha. I want moar!!!
right there with jerry on this…poor taste in humour wen u need to be offensive.
Jerry was kinda right for the wrong reasons. The “creation” (copyright Judeo-Christain 3600 Bc) is mythical, not historical. Although you could do a whole mythical status update meme.
Thor … hammer time!
Loki … no fair, you get all the cool stuff, I get a rabid wolf, bastard keeps biting me.
Odin likes this
Buddha is.
Ryleh …. who the fuck friended Cthulu?
Jesus, God, and Holy Spirit are attending Day of Judgement. Are you Quick or Dead (click one).
Very funny! But dont joke about God, it`s unrespectable to religious people
Unrespectable? You mean disrespectful?
If your religion is true and practiced correctly, you would not mention your petty grievances over anothers opinions. Those who are easily offended will be easily offended by anything.
Some people crack me up, “Oh no, a joke about god, that’s absolutely terrible!” Yet not one person said anything about the Columbia Space Shuttle. This article is funny from start to finish, F people’s reservations about religion.
As someone who is considering history as a major, this is awesome.
I loved the God jokes, it’s not really appropriate but sometimes the inappropriate jokes make for the best ones. Well done, whoever did this.
Yeah, funny how people got upset about the reference to God, but not about the 7 people that died on Columbia. Their families are still living with that you know?
The idea of the God joke was that God created the world. So, there would be no-one to comment on his status you see? No-one! That’s the joke! It’s not offensive! But then, religious people are not famous for their sense of humour.
DUDE. its all a joke. all you Jesus lovers stop ruining all the shit
What? you can talk about other religions and make jokes about other cultures but when it comes to YOUR God.. its off limits? Give me a fucking break man.
All religion is good, let’s just all get along
oohh SNAPS I CANT BELIEVE HOW GENIOUSLY FUNNY THAT WAS!!!! LMFBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
I want MORE. This was the funniest thing I have seen in ages. I’m off my chair killing myself laughing…tears streaming down my face….OMG!
PS…please have a sense of humor fellows. I’m sure the invisible man up in the sky will laugh too.
I’m gonna call bull here – religious jokes are funny, so are black jokes, and gay jokes, and white people jokes, and jewish jokes – all funny (well not all of them are funny but its not because of the subject matter). If you can’t laugh at yourself then it is my most sincere hope that god made you sterile so you genes can be edited out of the pool…. @jerry – get over yourself
The ONLY one I thought iffy on the acceptable/humorous scale was the Columbia one. The rest, including the god and church ones were freaking hilarious. I almost missed the Newton one at the end! LOL
Columbia- inappropriate. The rest – hilarious. Uber-Christians need to get a sense of humor. (Be careful, extremism has to start somewhere…)
this is funny!..dont think any of it was to be offensive to anyone! just to get you to smile or laugh..this was very creative, and i loved it!..WWJD..he would smile & laugh!! geesh ppl, get a grip
@harrylime: awesome!
the main reason religious people get upset about jokes made about their religion is that they are afraid their fairy stories can’t withstand the power of ridicule. and they are right.
That was a scream, the religous fogeys need to back off and get a sense of humour.Their God is not untouchable after all he let 6 million of his chosen race down pretty recently.
“But dont joke about God…”
“This was funny until you got to the God part. Totally not funny anymore.”
You guys have looked in a mirror, right? If you believe in monotheism, you’ll hopefully (eventually) find the humor in the fact that a deity with nothing better to do, creates goofy fuckups like humans to go scrambling about in his/her own personal little “ant” farm kicking the crap out of each other and stealing all the good stuff from their neighbors and all other species co-existing on this planet…what other religion/spirituality could there ever be but laughter in a world like this?
The “Titantic” portion was kind of a dud. =/
But the God portion absolutely cracked me up. Jesus: “Don’t worry Dad, I got this.” Hahaha! Come on. That’s not -making fun- of Christianity. That’s something a Christian would joke about Jesus saying during a conversation between him and God. Lighten up! My father’s a retired pastor and he bought a pin that read: “Don’t make me come down there.” — God.
Where do you think humor CAME from? Don’t you think God has a sense of humor? Look at the platypus, for Heaven’s sake! Or baboons. =D And the cute little things that baby animals and humans do. Laughter is God’s gift. Use it!
Common people. This is about humor! And even religion can be the subject, or else you are taking life way too serious, if you know what i mean.
i don’t know how many of you recall the challenger… was in fourth grade… it was three days before i heard the joke what does nasa stand for… need another seven astronauts.. jokes are our attempt to make good from bad in most cases… personally, i feel that a good “ribbing” at god and nasa isn’t a bad thing… we all need a break from taking it too serious…
Agree with most folks… God and others were funny! Columbia one was thumbs down.
someone bring jerry a box of tissues so he can cry himself to sleep about his poor offended God. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
As a christian, I found the “God” one especially funny! The Colombia one less so, but that’s just a personal preference. I’d love to see a whole book!
OH COME ON!… grow a sense of humour. If you go around in life so serious you’re going to be sorely disappointed with what you find out there.
I am a catholic church goer and i loved it!
Very funny, especially Newton’s part.
Nevertheless, as Jerry said, you should not have brought God into this. You wouldn’t like God making fun of you after you die now, would you? Even if you don’t believe you’re going to Him again, are you willing to take the risk … ?
Repent!
It’s especially funny cause God isn’t real!
Wow, you people offended by God being there need to get your panties out of a bunch. I’m Christian and I found the God part hilarious. They weren’t making fun of anything, they were just poking fun at historical figures and events. It’s not the same as MAKING fun of someone. If it implied he didn’t exist, then yes, it has no place there, but it was just stating the point of views of Christians. If God doesn’t belong there then neither does Darwin but I don’t see the evolutionists throwing a bitchfit on here.
well if then is so forth of ernt
As a (very odd) Christian myself, there’s nothing offensive about the God stuff.
Vewy funny. Especially the God stuff. God’s either imaginary or omnipotent. Either way, God’s way too powerful to care if we make fun of it. Do we care if ants make fun of us?
And I’d say “Good Call” to Rob about nobody being there to comment on God’s creating the world, and yet it’s all unexplained where the women came from who married Cain and Abel. Surely they didn’t marry their sisters!! But if Adam & Eve were the only other people on the planet, where did their waives come from? Hmmmmm? Guess there must have been someone on earth to comment after all.
epic nice!
Definitely cool stuffs. Nice
@George agreed sir! These jokes are funny! Maybe some of you just need to get laid. I know if i wasnt gettin any, I would get all grumpy about dumb shit too. Hell, just rub one out and your sense of humor goes up like 5 points! haha
It’s funny, how satire tends to be misread…seriously what part of the religious stuff was not something that you would hear in Sunday School as a kid.
And the Darwin Galileo stuff is a pretty good simplification of historical events.
Hilarious. I’m talking about these comments. hahaha. The FB statuses are brilliant too. God would be looking down laughing his face off at the pompous self-righteous ones right now.
this is ‘hilarious’, no srsly, like the ‘freshest’ Facebook joke out there, maybe it’s not the first, but it still is something…
the funniest part is how some ppl get offended by jokes about their favourite science-fiction characters
LOVE IT!!! absolutely hilarious. more plz?
Brilliant!!!!
If we should refrain from joking with “what people worship”, then we should refrain from joking-period.
So no, we are not obliged to stand with owe before anybody’s obcessions, Jerry.
I find it amusing that taking digs at Christianity is acceptable, but I wonder how people might feel if it were Islam as the butt of the jokes. Funny how it’s not up there, now isn’t it?
I befriended Cthulhu. The Pseudonomicon told me too.
“It was funny until the god part”
you’re okay with mocking dead astronauts, but GOD?!?!?!? oh no, no, please, fire all over my body!!!!!!!!
Imagine what kind of whining would have been here if there was an Obama joke.
Most of those were funny except the Galileo and Charles Darwin statuses. Should really try to be more historically accurate…
Also, instead of cockroach at the end of the meteor status, probably should’ve been a rat, a mouse, or some small rodent.
HELLO PEOPLE, ITS A JOKE!!!! GET OVER IT!!! ITS ALL HILARIOUS!!!
politics…religion…always gonna be a doozy. Each to their own I guess. I thought everything was BRILLLL and far from crass…And I am the king of crass…wanna hear a dead baby joke?
God has a sense of humor
God- Abraham, you will have a son
Abraham – Yeah right. I am old God. LOL at God.
Abraham has a son. God tells him to name his son Isaac which means, laughter, or to laugh.
I thought it was funny…and I really don’t think its disrespectful at all.
Could have done without the Space Shuttle one.
Allah is God, I think, its one and the same, according to Islam. They just believe that Mohammad was the best/final prophet, or something like that. So really, you’ve got all three religions, judaism, christianity, islam covered by this joke.
@monny there was no mention of ne specific religion. there was mentioning of the church, unless u agree that the world is flat then thats another issue. ur an ignorant tard, do u even KNOW that the story of Adam and Eve EXISTS in the Quraan? so we can say that Islam and Judiasm were also the butt of some jokes. how bout u read a book, u might learn smthn.
You guys believe in god, huh. Grow up and think for yourselves.
Muslims also believe in God and they also believe that Jesus is a prophet so this would be offensive to any religious body that believes in God and Jesus, there is no need to start a battle of religions here just enjoy the frickin joke
why does everything always turn into an argument about (to do with) religion? it was quite interesting scrolling down the list of comments and watching the ripples spread…..nice job, jerry. you should’ve been in the butterfly effect.
Come on. The God stuff is not disrespectful. Funny is funny. I don’t think it’s saying anything offensive anyway. God created humor too.. so lighten up. Now, I’ll add my vote that that the Columbia bit is going a little far. I know it’s been a few years, but still as they say in comedy “too soon”. I’m going to guess the author knew to self edit any “posts” from the twin towers, this isn’t a lot different.
As a Christian I didn’t find any of those jokes about God offensive. But the one about Columbia was kinda mean and quite disrespectful. Otherwise, that was the best 5 mins of my day
@Moony FYI there are plenty of jokes about terrorists and stuff like that. Have you ever seen Achmed the Dead Terrorist? Extremely funny stuff. Christianity is not the butt of jokes all the time. Stop getting your panties in a wad and move on.
can we have some more please
For all those who think that was fun… Go get a life!! Cuz after that.. U’ll be punished for sure!! I didnt find it funny.. That was pathetic…
Ask for God’s forgivness now!
@Moony:
Muhammad status update: WTF? I just saw this dude who said he was the Angel Gabrielle
Gabrielle: Read bitch!
Muhammad: I can’t read!
Aisha (Muhammad’s wife): sucks thumb (she’s only 6 years old)
Say what?
I don’t see how the God part is offensive at all. It’s not making fun at all. It’s just putting humor into it. And I do believe that God likes humor….sorry, but I don’t think he wants us to be sulking around Earth for our lives having no fun. People are too sensitive these days, lighten up!!!
Wow it’s amazing how everyone is attacking Jerry He just expressed what he felt… Why is that a wrong thing… Just like laughter getting offended is an emotion and one should be entitled to that… Free speech, the ppl who fight for it contradict it the most
GTFO our internet Jerry. I would have shared this on Facebook if your fucked up comment wasn’t the default text.
Quit yer whinin’ you whiners.
If there is a god, he must have a sense of humor. He made humans. Some people would be offended by Bill Cosby’s Noah act.
hahahah totally awesome, especially the god parts!
omgosh! these comments are real? I thought they were part of the joke. LOL!
totally rocked my socks off!!!!
Work >>
You’re stupid, god isn’t real. Use common sense and man up. Laughing at “god” is hilarious on the other hand.
John Hancock’s picture is perfect.
omg, the only thing funnier then the facebook thread is the comment war that followed. clap clap clap. I think I peed myself.
I find it painfully ironic when a person A tells a person B to leave a person C alone (when person B disagrees with a comment made by person C and attacks them back in comment) on the grounds that they are restricting a persons right to freedom of speech by verbally abusing them..
Awesome xD
this is absolute brilliance!
that was the coolest thing i’ve read in a LONG time!! i want more!!!
@AP you can delete the default text, thats what i did…
Loved the Galileo post. Fantatsic.
AAHHHMMAAAAZZZZZZZZZZZIIIIIIIIIINNGGGGGGG……………..awesome shit….loved every bot of it
Brillant…pissing my pants laughing…could have left the space shuttle out.
This was hilarious. Loved John Hancock’s pic of Lenny Kravitz lol
This was the funniest thing ever! I love God’s posts, and that John Hancock’s picture was of Will Smith as Hancock… and the responses from “The Church”…. amazing!
Did anyone else find themselves clicking “older posts” hoping to get more? lol
LMFAO!! i laughed so hard I hit my head on my key board!!! and had tears falling out of my eyes! GREATTTTT JoB
Just when I was feeling admiration for all the religious people for not getting upset about the “church resists science” updates, somebody has to whine about that!
Come on, people, even the Catholic Church has changed their policy and acknowleged that the earth orbits the sun!
All you angry Christians out there, can’t you practice your own religion and *leave the judgement to God*?
If some of us get a laugh at the expense of religion, it really is for God to decide whether he’s offended (or agrees, or thinks the whole lot of us maned apes could use some culling…”I said be fruitful and multiply – not swarm over the earth and overwhelm it with your numbers – sheesh!”)
This. Was. AWESOME. Whoever said John Hancock’s pic was the best rules, because that was hilarious.
Also, @Jerry – Some people worship cows and believe that they’re sacred. When was the last time you ate beef?
ya i clicked on “older posts” to it dont work hopfully there will be more. the titanic rules
I’m going to say this very slowly… if you think it’s ‘too soon’ to joke about the Challenger, you’re a douche. If you think that might have offended God, you’re a douche. If you were offended by the God jokes, you’re a douche.
PS: God doesn’t exist – time to grow up
The God part was awesome xD Some others were pretty good toO!
@ Krissy D.: I absolutely clicked “older posts” hoping for more! LOL
@ Angela: Laughing right along with you!
As a lifelong Christian, I found the God jokes especially funny. Follow the logic here – God created man in his own image (human behavior is based on the behavior of God), therefore, God has a whack sense of humor, as you need to be a little twisted to survive in this world.
(OK, I know that logic stream is a little non-sequitor. Bite me. It’s still valid.)
If that isn’t enough evidence for you, if you really don’t think God has a sense of humor, just look at the people around you….or look in the mirror. It’s all good!
Look I’m gonna say the whole thing was funny as hell. I belong to “The Church” and even I laughed. Don’t be such Debbie Downer and stop getting offended at the slightest things. Take things with a grain of salt. It was meant to be funny. The
Firstly, BRILLIANT POST..
Secondly
I haven’t read the comments so someone may have pointed this out before..
Isn’t there a mistake here?
If the post was 344 years ago, shouldn’t the comments be be as old?
How come the apple fell 344 years ago and the follow up comment is 25 minutes ago..?
Would’ve been cool if u had Prophet Muhammad there with no photo.. just speech…
So people are upset about the god status, others are upset about the space shuttle, but it’s okay to laugh about all those that died on the titanic? Get over it, they are funny and are meant to be light hearted relax! I bet those who are pissed are still mad at their parents fir lying to them about Santa, egregious!
Very well done! Sitting patiently for part 2
YES ^^^
Everything Made Me Smile/Laugh.
everyone’s so up the butt about things nowadays..
jesus christ -________-
IT’S A SHAME THAT WHEN YOU POST THIS LINK ON ANYTHING, IT SHOWS THE STUPID COMMENT BY JERRY UP THERE AS A BYLINE. RUINS THE WHOLE THING. MAKES THE LINK LOOK LIKE A LINK TO A PAGE WHERE YOU ARE HATING ON IT INSTEAD OF SHARING A LAUGH…
Even as a devout Roman Catholic, I found the “God” part funny. Not accurate, nor reflecting my beliefs? Certainly. But funny anyway. Made me laugh
So chill out people. They made fun of the Church — i.e. my church — too, and a lot of that was true, which just made me laugh harder.The authors probably don’t really think that God had the hots for Eve; it was supposed to be funny, and it was. Relax.
Lets play spot the Ignorant Yanks……
They’d be the ones who have a problem with 7 people dying on columbia but FAIL to mention/dont have an issue with the 1500 odd people who froze to death/drowned when the titanic sank.
GOD – GUYS DON’T JOKE ABOUT GOD NOT COOL OMG
COLUMBIA SPACE SHUTTLE – HAHAHA THE DEATH OF THE INNOCENT IS HILARIOUS, I SEE NO PROBLEM WITH THIS
LOL YOU GUYS
It’s not funny to make fun of anything. Even though we shared a good laugh, still…
Those who don’t respect don’t deserve to be respected. It’s fact.
Awesome!!!
Mannn….them boys got the bttr of the Church….Galileo & Darwin…u guys rockkkk…
It’s also a shame that Jennifer is retarded and doesn’t know how to type.
Also inte the retarded family: That Jerry guy and his ancient book.
Made a suicidal woman laugh again.
In WHAT WAY is this god stuff offensive????? Seriously?
If you are Christian, then it doesn’t actually say ANYTHING contrary to the bible???
WTF??? Stop being so silly and stupid!!! Or is just because God is mentioned that you find it offensive???? How is saying that God created the earth, then “let there be light”, then adam, then eve… er… isnt that straight out of the bible?????????? and “original sin” er… thats a Christian concept… for F#$*-sake GROW UP!!!
OTHERWISE: this is HILLARIOUS! Nicely done!
WOAH man, all of it is a joke, people need to really loosen up a bit.. lol this was fantastic.
My God has a sense of humour. Thank God.
hilarious! do more!!!!!
The post about god isn’t disrespectful… it doesn’t portray god or the creation story in a negative light, nor does the joke ridicule god or the bible or Christianity in general. The joke itself is simply a modernized retelling of the creation story, and I cannot see how that would be offensive.
In the same way, the Columbia bit (people commenting about the Challenger- that accident happened in either the ’70s or the ’80s, the incident in question is the more recent one involving Columbia) is not disrespectful because it does not ridicule or negatively portray the astronauts. However, it is very distasteful, the same as joking about any other tragedy recent enough to be remembered. Is it clever? Yes. Is it funny? I suppose. But I still cringed instead of laughing when I read it. Sorry, but I still remember crying the day it happened… I don’t think I’ll ever find a joke about it truly funny.
Not-funny fake shits are not funny.
You guys need to get over the religious offensive BS. You can’t provide any evidence, and neither can your so-called all powerful god, of his existence. You’re only offended because beliefs rely completely on emotion. Well…your emotions mean little to me when you still believe in fairy tales with absolutely nothing to back up their validity.
Anyway…great entertainment here. Loved the asteroid one.
Please don’t make fun of gOD it’s unrespectful to our religiousness.
AH! Hahahahahhaha! Oh god… I almost peed! This is great. More please!
THIS WAS AWESOME!!!! I am a christian and I am not afraid to laugh. God created our sense of humor and we are in his image. If you don’t think God has a sense of humor, then life must be so sad for you. Who knows, today might be YOUR day to amuse him.
It’s “Caesar.” Like the SALAD. You’re on the internet – Google it, for fuck’s sakes.
It’s all about creativity! Amazing!!! The best part was: “God could do better”. Just like the bible!!!
Oh come on folks, do people think that God doesn’t know what funny is? Sure he does! He invented humor! He also invented the platypus and the giraffe, two pretty funny looking critters if you ask me!
“Cockroach: Whatevs.” LOL! Make more!
For those of you who don’t know;
the “too soon” rule in comedy (guideline, not law) is that we don’t joke publicly about victims of murder or tragic accident until after everyone who knew them personally and loved them has died, so…
Julius Caesar: OK
Abraham Lincoln: OK
Titanic:OK
Challenger: too soon
Sept 11 attacks: too soon – and so on.
(unless it’s really funny)
This stupid religious argument ruined a thread that should be about this Awesome post. Off topic and annoying
So…acording to you Dee. Micheal Jackson jokes are too soon? How about this one…a nice politically incorrect son of a bitch joke.
Micheal Jackson’s wife made a public statement today; “First my parents leave me in Portugal, then my husband dies. FML”
Too soon?
hahahaha this is the funniest shit i’ve ever read thumbs up!!!
Why does John Hancock get to wear cool shades?
Pretty funny, you messed up the dates of the comments tho =/ should have been (at least) close to the year of the status… don’t u think?
OMG those poor dinosaurs! How dare you disrespect their memories! Those dinosaurs were innocent creatures and you people SPIT on their graves! HOW DARE YOU! (sarcasm)
I just peed myself a little.
You guys might like this one, and some of you just might hate it, too!
http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1802364
This was too funny..I think God has a sense of humor and does not like his people depressed all the time just let it be fun jeez my Pastor would find it hilarious about Jesus saying I GOT THIS DAD too cute…Creative and Funny Family Guy does it all the time and I love the show…who do you think gave you the ability to laugh…Lighten up
Jokes about God offend christians, not God.
She could give a shit.
The only people REALLY WHINING here are the ones who want religious types to respect other people’s opinions. What’s REALLY FUNNY is that they don’t respect the opinions of religious types.
P.S.: I thought this whole thing was hysterically funny, so stay off my back.
“Posted by Jon on August 19th, 2010 at 10:39 am
This was hilarious. Loved John Hancock’s pic of Lenny Kravitz lol”
It’s Hancock aka Will Smith…
form the movie of the same name.
you obviously COMPLETELY missed the point of that joke!
but still enjoyed it apparently…
gratz
OMG this is so freakin funny, please do more, this world could use a good belly shakin laugh like it gave me!!! kudo’s to u for this awesome humor!!!!
Hey, I’m religious and God’s FB was my absolute favorite! There was NOTHING offensive about it. They just took the first 2 chapters of Genesis and put it in FB form, very accurately! Stop your complaining!
Science flies people to the moon.
Religion flies people into buildings.
The reason why the God jokes are offensive to Christians it’s because the God they kno is a personal God involved in their lives – not just a mystical force out there.When you make fun of Him, you are making fun of something very important and special. Yeah, we do have a sense of humor, but if jokes are against something that you love, then it hurts. Doesn’t matter whether it’s funny or not (we can see the humor in it too – and if it wasn’t so important we might laugh) but jokes can hurt. Just lettin’ ya kno!
I have one:
Abe Lincoln: Just signed the amincation proclamtion-slaves are free…and why is everyone saying that this Obama guy has done so much for African Americans?
i want to meet the genius that though of this. so brilliant
Bah, you guys complaining about the religious jokes need to lighten up. If you can’t see the mild humour in it, then you’re waaay too serious and need to step back.
Getting your knickers in a knot over perceived insults about your religion has started enough wars, wouldn’t you say?
Anyways, this was frickin’ funny
Funny. End of.
I think its fair to believe all the hyper-sensitivity is from americans. Go have some counselling or something… Its better to see the funny side of tragedy than whine and cry about it all the time.
Go pop some anti-depressants or whatever you lot do……
For the large number of non-whining americans – can you go slap the whining ones? Thanks ;o)
See, I read this and was all, ‘Oooh, I’m going to get to the comments and people will be UP IN ARMS over the Columbia joke!’
Then I get to the comments and people wind up UP IN ARMS over…one of the gentler, nicer jokes? Guys, just because God and Jesus are the subjects of a joke doesn’t make it disrespectful. Stop being idiotic. ‘Oh, no, they took the story of creation, reduced it to its basic points, and put it in the vernacular! And used the Buddy Christ! BURN THEM. BURN THEM ALL.’ Really? Are you kidding me right now?
I submit that anyone offended by the God joke is not a Christian. There. I said it.
Oh come on, G-d would love this, he/she has a great sense of humour, have you seen a Platypus?
Ancient Asteroid one is too funny.
Can we PLEAZE get a reference to “The Donner Party” in there? The comic possibilities are virtually ENDLESS!
OMG was this funny. It made my day!
@ Sir Tony Rudd – Yes, “Titantic”. It rhymes with “pedantic”.
@Jerry…obvious troll is obvious
@everyone else…PLEASE DON”T FEED THE TROLLS
all you people complaining that God was used in jokes, WOW. Pathetic and get over it. I garauntee you have laughed at something that offended somebody. It was funny, that’s it. F@^$ing politically correct BS. By the way God laughed at this when I shared it with Him, and told me to say if you don’t like it, simply don’t read it.
Hilarious! More please!!!!!!
MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE!!
That was hilarious!
It took me a minute to the Newton one.
now the titanic was hilarious!!!
Love that the God picture is the one from Monty Python and the Holy Grail
I say we have a war to decide which religion is more peaceful
and while you all are doing that…
This Buddhist will be drinking tea in the corner
BTW, the Columbia space shuttle was a bit poor in taste, but the others rocked!
It seems like some people wilfully misinterpret humour, just so they can get offended and point their self-righteous finger at someone else. If you make the effort to read the joke properly, you will notice that they don’t make fun of God and Jesus in any way; in fact, they express the doctrines and beliefs very cleverly.They do satirise the human misbehaviour and the historical actions of human religious authorities, however, so I suppose that if some people worship The Church, rather than God and Jesus, then yes, they will find grounds for offense. More importantly, this was hilarious!
Hilarious!
BEST. THING. EVER!!!!
and as a strong christian i was not offended, chill out guys, laugh a little…you’ll live longer :/
God bless America! and God…please help some people with their sense of humor, help them lighten up
i have only two words to say abt it HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!
How you guys get these crazy ideas????
freaking hillarious, just made my day:))
loved the WHOLE article.
i think at this point it’s not the article that’s getting everyone fired up, but it’s all the comments.
Haha, super cool. Loved the church part.
I’m a so called Uber-Christian and thought the God section was a riot. Columbia, a little distasteful for me. That’s not far enough in History to be funny. There were 7 people killed and their families are still dealing with the loss.
After julius ceasar’s last comment, the party-goers should chant, “TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!”
hahahaaa
I adore the Galileo one, “are you high bro’ XD”
I thought this article was hilarious. Anyone with half a brain understands the point. To the people taking “offence” to the references to God and the church, get a life. YOU are the problem. Not articles like these.
Adding Hancock was a cunning touch. Nicely done!
That is some funny S–t!
I’m a Christ-follower and thought this was hilarious – so there! Woot! I love how Jesus only has to say one thing in all this, and it’s like putting that last cherry on the sundae to make it perfect, hahaha
If this is done about 100 or so years from now…
Judge Vaughn R. Walker: Hey hey! Guess what? It turns out that a private moral view of same sex couples being inferior to opposite sex couples is not a proper basis for legislation
The Church: AAAAAARRRRRGGGH!!!!!! I F^@KING HATE YOU ALL!!!
that shit is hilarious
This is absolutely brilliant.
Am I the only one who still doesn’t get the Newton one? O.o Someone explain please?
This was funny…almost as funny as the idea of people worshiping an imaginary sky magician with a zombie jew on a stick for a son. Oh, wait…
Y’all might like this one, too: http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1802364
Funny.
One small glitch. You got the timelines wrong with the comments to the original posts. Sucked the fun a tad bit away.
I lol’d.
the columbia space shuttle exploded leaving earth, not returning. funnier if the facts were accurate.
This is funny. Like some of the others, didn’t care for the Columbia bit. Comedy = tragedy + time. Just hasn’t been enough time to feel okay laughing about that.
Otherwise, officially, “hilar.”
This was hysterical! ESPECIALLY god creating shit and the church ‘disliking’. That’s exactly how it would have gone down- two thumbs way up.
P.S. Kudos on getting the bible-huggers in an uproar! It’s not a party until ‘christians’ are picketing at the door lol
Great great hilarious stuff. Loved Newtons. The little things made it great, by far the best was John Hancock’s profile pic.
I’m religious, and I LOVED how they made fun of the church, but made God’s post’s just, just so humorous.
Like if it was during the colonial era:
The Church posts “YA CHRISTIANS SHOWED THOSE INGINES WHOS BOSS! We got braggin rights this century. #1 From sea to shining sea bitches!”
Jesus comments “OMD, really guys? Did you even listen to what I was sayin back in the day? >:|”
I think these comments are evidence that the inventors of religon were the greatest trolls in human history.
This was hilarious! All of it. I am Catholic and enjoyed the God part. It’s really not offensive if you have a sense of humor.
sooo love the whole article!!!cool…and very funny… xD
I thought they were all great. The Titanic ones were spectacular. “Bitch slapped a pussy Iceberg” I mean come on how can you think that’s NOT funny? Great job whoever wrote these.
Posted by Filip on August 20th, 2010 at 2:37 am
It’s also a shame that Jennifer is retarded and doesn’t know how to type. Also inte the retarded family: That Jerry guy and his ancient book.
LOL @ how Jerry can’t spell OR type… I can certainly do both.
proof that god has a sense of humor: he made us
and it defiantly needed to be longer
maybe some stuff about hitler and the world wars maybe even add something about when the fallen goes to earth XD
Columbia Space Shuttle did not make me chuckle. Everything else I thought was hilarious. More, please!
Wow..good stuff.
and ther’ll be lots of stuff to write about other cultures and religions too..I wish I were free to do that.
I’m supposed to be a Hindu and I can think of 100′s of such funny things. But my ppl will not take them sportively. And we cant dare thinking something abt Islam,let alone writing.
LMFAO and for those crying about the God thing why not just go meet your imaginary maker and tell him about it? Besides it will do the rest of us with a brain a favour
IF your imaginary friend had a problem then wouldn`t we all be smited down already, damn get over yourself I was taught as a child imaginary friends were stupid and then some dick tells me of an imaginary friend in the sky. You can bet I laughed my arse off at him and threw a billion questions all of which he couldn`t answer.
Bible-thumpers gotta ruin everything. Go read your Bibles, kids…. cover to cover. I think you’ll find you’re doing shit wrong anyway. I found it all funny. I can see where someone could be upset about the Columbia one but then again, it’s history. Not necessarily a joke. It’s history with a humorous spin on it. I liked it.
OK, let’s just get the whole ‘inappropriate jokes’ thing out of our system, ‘k?
Space shuttle Challenger disaster:
- NASA is going to switch to Sprite because they can’t get Seven Up
- Christa Mcauliffe said to her husband before she left: “You feed the cat, I’ll feed the fish”
- What color were Christa Mcauliffe’s eyes? Blue. One blew here, one blew there.
- “NO, I said BUD LIGHT”
Done.
“Jesus:I got this, Dad.” LMAO!!
THIS IS TOO FUNNY! If teachers would share entertaining things like this for the kids to read to help them get interested in History, they would be more engaged in the classroom setting. Just sayin’!
Love the God stuff! Love the Darwin stuff! Love the Asteroid stuff! It’s all Great & very creative!
the Cockroach was awesome LoL
God was bored so he created LIGHT LoL
this is hilarious ! ! !
God gave me a penis, are you telling me he’s not making fun of us constantly? Humanity is the biggest joke in the universe. Original sin my foot; What could an omniscient, omnipotent, all loving, all caring, superior being want for it’s creations except for them to be happy and peaceful for the duration of their existence? And then extremists come in and start killing people in the name of their all loving, all caring, all forgiving, God. “We’re pro-life, and we’re gonna kill you in the name of peace and love!”
Worship how you want to worship, nobody is stopping you. We live in a land built on the freedom to practice religion as we see fit, or not at all.
haha loved this
i got one too:
Pandora: got a gift from zeus today
Prometheus:…What is it?!
pandora: eh some box, looks cool but i cant open it for some reason
zeus: unless you like nasty shit going on….
pandora: :O
“eris likes this”
I’m surprised how many people are confused about the Challenger vs. the Columbia Space Shuttle disasters. Let’s clarify: the Challenger exploded during take-off in 1986 and was NOT mentioned in this (very funny) set of fake posts. The Columbia had damage to its heat shields or some such and exploded on reentry in 2003.
Personally, I think Columbia jokes are “too soon,” but only w.r.t. me finding it funny. I don’t think that it means someone shouldn’t tell them — everyone’s “too soon” will be different. And it also depends a bit on how funny it is — honestly, the funnier it is, the sooner you can tell the joke.
Also — everyone calm down about the whole “god” thing — there are not actually very many people “complaining” about it. Its all the responses that are making it look like a big deal. Like a previous poster said, “Don’t feed the trolls.” (Even though I think its pretty judgmental to call them trolls, its still true that we’re just feeding intolerance when we give those ideas so much “air time” by continuing to talk about it.) Oops, look at me, continuing to talk about it…
HAA HAA HAA I LOVES IT!!! When you parody and satirize you do not get to pick and choose,it is ALL fair game……You make fun of it ALL or NOTHING AT ALL…..Keep up the EXCELLENT work!!
i also am a Christ follower and i found the post about God to be hilarious. it was smart and witty and frankly very funny and i don’t think the author was attempting to be offensive. well played… however i agree with the space shuttle, a bit in poor taste. would love to see more of the rest though, too!
Lolz… hilarious!!!
Fucking funny!
People who can’t deal with others even MENTIONING their religion in satire (A) Don’t know a whole hell of a lot about the true meaning of their religion and (B) Are the reason people used to get burned at the stake/ are being blown up by suicide bombers.
I love this, absolutely hilarious! Nice work
Very funny!!! Some of the comments had me lmao too! Looking forward to reading more…
Hi….I’m religious. And that God stuff you did was downright hilarious
Well played!
I agree with the bulk of this list of posters – get a grip on what offends you – this was innocent joking and not ABOUT ‘YOUR God” (which I always find to be a funny reference). And just for grins, I love when anyone references the Pseudonomicon. (look for it).
Funny stuff
Bible thumpers get over yourselves.
Love it.
But why isnt it chronological?
Ok, that was hilarious. Especially John Hancock’s pic. Oh man I almost died there.
Now, the Columbia one, I thought anyway, was too far. That was a little tasteless, but as far as the God jokes go, that wasn’t over any line. The most offensive part was Jesus’ comment and even that wasn’t terrible. Lighten up people.
This is great!!! Inspirational….. =)
propper funny !! all of it !! jerry……. f**k off…twatt
Um… Ben Franklin did not sign the declaration of independence.
lol lol lol!!
Really funny! More of this!
Blasphemy is a victimless crime.
It’s fine to make fun of god and Jesus and all that, because they never existed. They are myths. Stories. Fiction. Making fun of fictional creations is fine. Making fun of people who waste their lives “believing” in fictional creations is fine, too. Disrespectful? Too bad- do something worth of respect, then.
god is laughing his ass off
Boris,
I *did* day ‘guideline, not law’, and also ‘unless it’s really funny’.
I have to say I didn’t get yours. I don’t really follow pop culture that closely, so it could be hilarious, I just didn’t get the reference (or else it was more of a quote than a joke)
Dee
OMG this is hilarious!! I even clicked older posts because I wanted more! You guys gotta do some more of these…Henry VIII would be hilarious!
[...] should teach us a lot of things. We would probably pay a lot more attention if it had a Facebook status, but there are still things we can learn. Your dad will always be better at fixing shit than you. [...]
This is just great!
Haha.
The comments are probably funnier than the actual post itself.
Religious headbangers = lots of lols.
Or am I being ‘unrespectful’ to all you people who live in fear of the big bogeyman in the sky?
Um, yes Ben Franklin did sign the declaration of independence. Kelly, you’re special.
Oooh. Too soon on the Columbia Space Shuttle one. Too soon. But the rest, pretty hilarious.
this is just a bit extra hillarious! the original sin!! haha.
funny BUT Darwin did not say we evolved from lower primates or apes or that creatures evolve from lower life form so it was a misquote but still…
I didn’t find the Titanic/Columbia stuff that funny, but God and The Church made me lol. SOOOO clever! This was really well done and I hope to see more with political scandals (like Monica Lewinsky and George Rekers).
And to the person who was wondering about people marrying brothers and sisters in the Bible, read Genesis more carefully. It says that the sons of God (Adam’s descendants) and the daughters of man (descendants of the people created when God said to Adam “let’s make man in our image”) got together. Some believe that Adam and Eve were in Eden and other created people were hanging out elsewhere, so no incest necessary. Just a theory.
Good idea. Lame execution.
Gott ist tot. No, really! Ask Kant or Plato!
All of this was great, thanks! And if we weren’t such a crazed, worked-up world these days I think people would just ignore the humorless Christians as pathetic and unfortunate. On the space shuttle joke, I’d say it wasn’t so much disrespectful as just the only joke that happened to fall flat. The exception that proved the rule.
totally agree that the Columbia one is too soon, but these are funny for sure!
i want more,,ya got more,huh have ya???
may God smite me for laughing at such funny jokes!!!
Brilliant! I used it as part of my lesson in class and the students love it!! Should make more of this and turns it into a collection.
Good job!
Funny stuff. All the posts are even funnier. I’m a Christian and I didn’t find the God stuff offensive. Had to cringe a bit on the Columbia one but that is just my opinion and I wouldn’t dream of forcing it on anyone. If you’re upset by finding anything offensive maybe you should stick to reading the phonebook…probably nothing there to offend your tender sensibilities.
LOVED the cockroach post !
Thanks to tacopapa I got a good laugh haha
I agree w the others.
In terms of inappropriateness:
Columbia > God jokes.
truely hilarious
religious people always gotta be downers
holy sh*t.. that was amazing..cant stop laughing..
hats off to the idea.. great..will pass this on to everyone..
Not bad – a facebook script of strictly religious characters would be better
One thing I’ve never gotten is why religious people are so sure that Jesus/God etc. don’t have a sense of humor. They’re supposed to be all loving and all perfect and all awesome, right? Then who’s to say that they couldn’t appreciate some gentle ribbing?
P.S. The religious stuff was awesome. Still trying to figure out how it was offensive.
‘God and the Snake like this’ – Brilliant!
The religion stuff…as everyone above has put it is just as real to those who believe as the other moments in history included in this posting. Whether you are offended or not, our words have power and the audience that we should care about is not the group who believe in God and don’t like this, it’s the group that doesn’t believe. These are the people who are most effected by a joke about creation or joke about sin or any other word that attempts to remove the power and sanctity of God’s Presence. The Bible tells us that God is both forgiving and jealous and has given us free will to live as we want and the power of the tongue to either bless or curse. How you choose to use those gifts is up to you.
It’s interesting to note that 1 comment from an (unverified) offended person of religious belief (Jerry) sparks a storm of hate-filled invective from multiple posts, overshadowing the dozens of comments from (again, unverified) unoffended persons of religious belief.
Another perfect example of how the supposedly TOLERANT are among the least so.
CW: You are brilliant. You captured the issue in a nutshell.
And I speak as a priest.
By the way, I laughed at all of it, except the dead astronauts. Yes, people can and do make jokes about things like that. We have an expression for that kind of humour. We call it cruel.
Great stuff guys!
and on the earlier post, one of the prophet with the no dp picture would be amazing!
why does everyone have to get in to arguments about religion and all that i’m an Atheist with Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu and Rastafarian friends, we all found this hilarious. when people stop getting offended by pieces of work like this then the less wars well be having and less humans will die…
WE ARE ALL HUMAN AND ALL THE SAME GET OVER YOURSELVES!
love
That shit was motherfucking funny goddamnitt. Fuck you.
The best is when people are so “religious” they don’t believe in dinosaurs. How stupid can you be? This was very funny, and I’m glad most of us with some common sense enjoyed it.
CW –
The only thing that doesn’t deserve tolerance is intolerance. Calling anyone’s own religious belief beyond reproach is downright intolerant. There is nothing disrespectful about skepticism and criticism.
These people’s posts most likely reflect a backlash of having to deal with religious opinion and political division based on religious belief being forced down their throats almost daily. Religious belief is the cause of many an ache and pain and being able to laugh at it is paramount and being chastised as being disrespectful for doing so should only be met with contempt.
Wow! That was great lol! You shut your mouth! Shut it right now! hahahaha
That was HILARIOUS!!! More please!
By the way, I believe in God, I am a christian and I did not find the “God jokes” offensive in any way. On the contrary, they were very witty and clever!
Lighten up, people!
Nobody loves a fanatic! (and this goes to both sides of this quarrel”!
Brilliant… and the religious crybabies are pretty damn funny too.
Look… I’m a Christian and I thought the whole thing was funny as get out. Stop taking things so personally!
brilliant. for most parts
nice thinking dude, awesome history… need more ^_^
Oh noes! Littlefoot!
My response
I’m Roman Catholic, and I enjoyed it all. Especially The Church’s response to Eve’s creation.
There should be more of these.
the Galileo post is wrong. Nicholas Copernicus was the first major scientist to postulate the heliocentric solar system. (Earth goes around sun).
I declare this to be officially some funny sh!t!! Nomination for 2010 funniest things award!! (if such a thing exists)
“Dude, Don’t be creepy!!”, Classically funny for all time!!
thanks to the creators!!
HAHAHA, the dinosaurs, John Hancock, Titanic…. So awesome.
Very funny.
The pedant in me would like to point out: (1) in the God post, the Church didn’t exist until after the life and death of Jesus. (2) in the Julius Caesar post, the affair wasn’t at the old villa, it was in the Forum outside the Senate, and probably during daylight.
FWIW, the Catholic Church has never had a real problem with Darwin. When his theory came out, the Church had already started to view Genesis non-literally. As far as I know, their reaction to evolution has pretty much been, “Yeah, maybe.”
hilarious stuff – I’m not sure which one I liked best… maybe the church’s reactions. It reminds me of the idiots who deny global warming.
Funny stuff! People getting sensitive about religion need to quit sulking though. It’s real funny as long as it’s about someone else’s faults, huh..
That’s hilarious dude! I love it. more more…
For the most part, pretty funny. The Columbia Space Shuttle was f’ed up though… I wouldn’t even joke about that. I loved God’s status. Jesus saves all fo sho!
All the flaming posts about Christians and monotheism have no place in the comment section except the trash can or street corner. If people were offended, then let them be offended. Don’t offend them even more.
Funny enough that I’m willing to forgive biblical stories being included alongside actual history.
MORE PLEASE!!!!! (more statuses, not more people bitchin about jokes)
I wasn’t offended. Read harder! I hate it when people confuse my posts with “The Church”s posts!
Is God gonna have to smite a bitch?
couldn’t stop laughing =D
how come noone has mentioned 9/11??…is it really too soon?…i’ve heard jokes far and wide….
i think it’s all relative to the audience, and i think the audience intended was for those with a sense of humor
BAHA YESSSS!!!!!!!!! greatest EVER! i love it.
You imbeciles. Of course I have a sense of humor. I created humans, didn’t I? Wait until the ships arrive. I’m gonna have a blast.
Christopher Columbus: OK guys, wish me luck. West Indies here we come. We’re all gonna be rich!!!
Queen Isabella: Good luck Chris. You wanna borrow my TomTom?
Christopher Columbus: Nah… I got this.
It was funny. Some parts were in poor taste,but funny none the less.Shame on some of you! Lighten up! This is HUMOUR. Stop being so serious!
EPIC WIN!! I haven’t laughed that hard in months thank you so very much. For the Dog oppps God whiners get a life. Not everyone believes in that shit you call a religion.
Are updates to this available for the e-mail? I love my e-mail funnies. XD
lolzzzz… can’t stop reading it over and over again. Still laughing.
I’m a Christian and I even forwarded this to my missionary friends. I’m sure they’ll love it too.
Skipping the Columbia one though. I fail to see how that is funny. Other than that, this is one of the funniest stuff I’ve read this month.
This was amazing! What’s even more amazing is the fact that a couple people saying “don’t make fun of god” (baiting?) created 95% of the comments following it. Hey, at least we’re having a discourse about god? yay.
England – why do you have the UNION FLAG as your avatar? It should be the CROSS OF St George.
MORE MORE !
Is Adam and Eve really a historical event??
No, the answer is it is not.
Still fucking funny though!
Okay i’m a Christian but and the God part in this article was hilarious ! There was nothing disrespectful about it at all ! Lighten up people ! Great article !
So damn funny
Love this whole page! Noone has had a go at Jerry for a while so… Hey Jerry, why don’t you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself!
@Fred Nurk, yes should be cross of St. George if the American war of independence was against England which it wasn’t.
The war was against all of Great Britain prior to the Union with Ireland. So it should be the pre 1801 Union Jack cross of St. George for England plus saltire of St. Andrew for Scotland (but omitting the cross of St. Patrick for Ireland) if we really want total accuracy ;S
AWESOMENESS!!! This totally made my morning!
Oliver Cromwell: @King Charles 1, you are total up yourself dude
King Charles: You are a right pain in the neck and my Irish mates hate you too
Oliver Cromwell: @ King Charles 1 – Loser! WTF
Frickin’ hilarious! As a history fanatic, seeing this spin on things really lightened up my day–Never seen such a take on history, especially the Ben Franklin post. Made me laugh my ass off.
Absolutely brilliant.
That was like so funny , the whole article was hilarious!
Do More … ^_^
None of this was funny. I’m not offended in any way, so that’s not why I’m saying this. I truly did not think any of this was even amusing.
Oh my Goooooood!! These jokes are very funny! =))=))=))))))))))))))
But the God jokes are the most funniest! And the Titanic too! And the Darwin! Oh all of them are cool!!!!!!!!
Why do you uberreligiosos have to quash everybody’s mellows? All the time? Everytime anything is said about anything? Shit!!!
I don’t recall ever reading in the Bible that the Earth is 6k years old. Then again, I ain’t read the whole bible lol. But seriously, in my old church, when I was younger, nobody EVER said how old they though the earth was. Must be some radical christians saying that.
This made my day! 10/10!
I bet if you put a joke on their about allah the muslims would riot and issue death threats and fatwahs decreeing the creators death.
Outstanding.
It seems to have taken Newton 344 years and 25 minutes to understand that principle.
Lover the asteroid joke and the Cockroach comment, it was amazing… couldnt stuff laughing…
if you cant laugh at the religious jokes then your faith in God and religion is weak enough that it could be shaken by a simple facebook joke…
So, let me get this straight… It’s okay to make jokes about our country’s founding fathers, but not the world’s founding father??!!
Give me a break. People like you give Christians a bad name. I happen to be a Christian, and I thought this was hilarious (yep, including the Gad parts)
Grow a sense of humor.
Kudos to the creator of this! Nicely done sir/maam
Very funny and clever, but the Columbia reference is in poor taste. It’s hard to find humor in a national tragedy so recent, if ever. Just my opinion…
If you can’t take a joke about God, then you might as well never leave your house.
LOL…can’t stop laughing..Quality work..specially the God one, Galileo, Ben Franklin..lol
LMFAO! the god thing. jesus: dont worry dad, im on it. lmfaooooooooooooooooooooooo
titanic thing was hlarioussssssss! i love the maker of this
i was reeally bored, soo yuh kinda made me less bored so thanks (: lmfaaao
nice one..
loved the church ones lmao.
Oh good grief, some people need to lighten up. I consider myself a Christian thought they were ALL hysterical!
Hilarious! Didn’t find the god-part that funny though, until i read Jerry’s comment! It’s the reminder that some people actually worships that stuff. Yet again, hilarious!
As an American living in London and married to an English man, I FUCKING LOVE THE BEN FRANKLIN POST!!!!! SOOOO funny! France Likes, hahaha!
Very funny, thanks so much.
The columbia joke made me sad, but I didn’t see anything wrong with it, it was just more poignant.
And yeah, god jokes are ALWAYS funny!
This is funny shiz…
hilarious & well done….
exceptin’ the whole “Ancient Asteroid” crack – you see I worship Ancient Asteroids and I expect every random site I come across on the interwebs to respect my wacky belief system regardless of how hilarious and astute the observations may be – it should all be deleted to protect my moronic eyes.
I haven’t laughed this hard in a while
Freaking hysterical ! More more more!
It was hilarious and why would someone get mad becasue of the God part or find it desrespectful. You close minded fools. Stop living in fear and except what life truly is.
haha. well said Mittle fritz
MOAR!!!!
I want more of these!!! I love them…
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Okay, this was not even remotely funny, witty or clever. Are you all really this entertained? My guess is that the original author posted half of these comments.
Fail.
I’m confused what “hit the jump to see more” means. I WANNA SEE MORE!!!
Haha, this is brilliant!
by the way, it’s not the god bit (i wont give this mythical bloke a capital G by the way) that’s offensive to me… it’s religion full stop that’s offensive!
I do love these people that need a crutch from their imaginary friend in the clouds to make excuses for all their failings in life!! They’re offensive as christians to me by BEING christians, as they have, without question, been brainwashed from birth to beleive their imaginery friend is real, and all other religions’ imaginary friends (Allah etc) are not. Hilarious! (same goes for all other religions tho!).
These same people don’t acknowledge the fact the bible is full of contradictions, and was written 100s of years ago by several different blokes centuries after things were supposed to have happened (some clearly did, but this Jesus chap, whilst probably a very good bloke in reality, well his acts of kindness sort of spiralled into mythical feats of godliness with the passing of time…).
… then the holy roman empire came along to continue to interfere, murder, crusade, pillage and make war in the name of their pretend mate… to feather their own nests. Same thing today. How many million Americans are members of evangelical churches?, which appear to all be fronted by super fake tanned white teeth filled smiling ‘pastors’ that appear to be living off those ‘tithes’ quite nicely thank ya’ll very much! …
So to me, it’s the people saying they’re christians that really offend, because at some point in their lives and in their logic, they completely disengage their thinking brains, which is the most dangerous and offensive thing someone can do. Hence the strife the world is in today.
But back to the humour, more of this please – fecking hilarious!!!!!
We all knew that NASA stands for need another seven astronauts…..
This is really funny – lets have some more. – And Christians usually have a sence of humour so keep it as it is.
funny shit man, funny shit!!
)
the church stuff was the best
sorry about your belief in asteroids mittle fritz =))))
God has a sense of humor too. Just look at the platypus. Get over it.
i like the “bro” thing! haha
and when Jesus said “I got this Dad”
And for the record, God put the tree there because he WANTED us to eat of it. Because he was bored and wanted someone to talk to that wasn’t constantly brown-nosing his arse.
i love God and am a conservative Christian, and i loved this! “don’t worry dad, i got this!” – hilarious!! =D not everyone gets offended that easily =)
Agree with God having a sense of humor. Challenger little too soon.
The Afghanistan Gynecology Association developed the IED IUD contraceptive. As sperm swims past, the contraceptive explodes and kills them. Funny but too soon.
this is so funny !!! and btw Christians DO have a sense of humor
actually, the God part was my favorite
LOL This was a laugh riot. I almost think people should like…make these profiles. It’d be just hilarious to do so
Oh and John…you clearly have no sense of humour.
Pretty hilarious all around. kudos to whoever thought it up
To: Human…I think you were shooting for “Disrespectful…” If “unrespectful” was correct, the good lord would have put it in the dictionary that way
Except for Columbia…totally hilarious.
This is really funny and cute. Hey, I’m religious to and don’t have a problem with a couple of religious jokes and who nows,(NO-ONE), but maybe God thinks it’s funny to. So all you little religious crack heads need to stop thinking for God and judging others. You’re giving us nice Christians a bad name.
Please make a FB status with Allah in it
Hilario! The god one was the funniest… that and Titanic had me dyin laughin
@mowhamid yea I don’t think I’d put a Muslim joke in here —- they might, maybe just not take it to be funny ——
have to be PC ya know ( and careful bout what you make fun of in these days and times )
As a history teacher, I laughed outloud! Too bad I can’t share with my 7th graders.
Then, why not…
WOTW@WTC: Beautiful views, great meal…Is that a plan….
How funny is that!
What, too soon?
Even Better
JFK: Nice day in the Lone Star State, going to the luncheon with the top down. Big D Loves Me!
soz, but i cant find jerrys message, he sounds ike quite a character
Even Better:
JL&Y: Heading home from Studio, signed some dudes Catcher in the Rye, creepy.
Hilarious! Very creative. Looking forward to more. to Peeps who have a prob with it need to lighten up.
Pretty funny … and could you please correct the spelling of Caesar’s name? ae, not ea.
This is one of the funniest things I have read in a LONG time. Loved every word of it. Priceless!
LMAO I was DONE immediately. “England -You done f d up now.” Bwahahahahaha. And it just got BETTER. The Titanic part DID suck though.
I couldn’t stop laughing about Abe Lincoln. And the cockroach was pretty funny as well.
more more more more more more more more more more!!!!! post more!!!!
@Denise — see, that’s what is Effed up. If maybe Christians started beheading people who mocked them, like some Muslims, a lot of these jerks would suddenly find it isn’t cool to mock Christians any more. But is that the world we want to live in?
ALL YOU RELIGIOUS PEOPLE SUCK MY CREATION FOOLS, GET SOME TRUTH WITHIN YOU.
JESUS TOLD YOU I LIVE INSIDE OF YOU, GO THERE.
Thank you! Brilliantly funny. Being a Brit, I particularly enjoyed Ben Franklin’s status (France likes this LOL).
dude, that asteroid one was hilarious. i loved how the brontosaurus had a picture of littlefoot! LMAO. and the cockroach was just like “lolokw/e.” put out more of them pls!
WTF????? i dont like the god part.. :S
That’s it, I’m calling the Bear Jew!
LOLOLOLOL!!
You made my day. Simply hilarious. Damn straight.
that’s awesome. i like it xD
This is really funny, and if you don’t think God has a sense of humor you better think again. Without a sense of humor he might have gotten rid of us a long time ago.
ROFL – just stumbled on this, freakin hiii-larious!!
As for the whole being offended about the God thing…seriously?!
@ Darrell : Loved that contraceptive joke there! It’s never a bad thing to make jokes about so called terrorism and whatnot, in the words of Omid Djalili – “It just makes people feel less scared of them!”
Kudos dudes!
I can’t even imagine how clever a person must be to come up with this shit. Hahahhaah..so awesome.
Genius. I could have done without the Columbia Space Shuttle part (too soon, especially compared to the others) but other that that is was brilliant.
We need more of these.
I assign my undergrads do this in my global civ courses. Well, without the cursing.
My favorite was the asteroid one, if I wanted to become a super-villain, I would make body-armor out of living cockroaches. I wouldn’t be satisfied until they decided to become my body-armor out of their own free will. Of course I could probably bend the rules a bit with some roach food.
Hahahaha omg i just loved the one with god and titanic =P <3
Brilliant…btw, they’re mostly making fun of the church (and mostly warranted),not so much religion or christianity.
Funny stuff…..can’t wait to read more.
Let’s calm down guys, I’m Christian too, but I actually thought this was quite hilarious. I take my religion seriously, and it’s inappropriate to make a joke of God and blaspheme, but I don’t believe this post was doing any of that. Disagree with me if you will, but I thought it was intelligent, actually…
One they forgot:
Germany – heading to Poland for the weekend, or so.
Poland – Oh yeah? What for?
Germany – Lol..it’s a surpise!
love it!!!!!!! the church and God part are great!
As a Christian, I had no problem with the God jokes. They were done tastefully, and were non-offensive. People need to get a sense of humor. And besides, non-believers are going to hell for a lot more reasons then making a few jokes!
This whole post is wildly offensive, not just the stuff about the church!!
Do you know how many British died in the revolution? Not to mention how insensative it is to dinosaurs. Everyone should be ashamed of themselves for reading this or even discussing it.
LMFAOOOOO! my sister thought i was laughing at rachel zoe project but i was really laughing at this. so funny. wish there was more. =D
lmao now thats some funny shit
ALL of these were hilarious (including the God jokes) except the Columbia one…that’s much to recent, not to mention awful, to joke about.
What you can´t joke about is not worth taking seriously… Don´t know who said it first but it´s true.
So many butt-hurt religious people whining about the god joke, imagine how many idiotic liberals would be bitching about an Obama joke. hooah.
Ummmm……are we still going to lynch Jerry?
I am as God fearing / worshiping / loving / adoring as any other Christian (I believe so anyway), and I thought the whole thing – except the Columbia Shuttle reference – was hilarious! Good, clean, intelligent. Loved it.
overall, brilliant.
tho, the columbia shuttle was not funny at all. it takes away from what was otherwise pure genius.
Gotta agree with those that commented on the Columbia reference. Pretty sick and wrong.
Fuck religion, that’s what it’s there for (to have the piss ripped outta it), but a terrible disaster like Columbia, should be left alone?!
Well, my pastor enjoyed the God jokes, for all you extremely Christian folks on the comments up there.
These are great but the second one and the last ones are the best.
Funny stuff, every single bit of it……lighten up haters….
IF the Columbia part was so offensive, why not the Titanic? Those were people who died, too…….but again, some people lighten up and enjoy a laugh from time to time.
This was absolutely hilarious. And for the people complaining about the god issue, take the bible out of your ass for 5 fucking seconds and learn to laugh a little
@ fugaisi you said that anyone reading this and commenting should be ashamed so…. I guess you should be ashamed too since you commented like way at the beginning lol. And for those that are offended by the God jokes??? this is why there is war, because some people just cannot relax and UNDERSTAND a simple joke. I thought it was hilarious.
That, was unreal awesome haha!!
Don’t joke about things people worship? Really? This was great!
brilliant stuff!! could have left the Columbia stuff out, but seriously .. laughed my ass off!
omg, this is INCREDIBLY hilarious. it was smart, and funny, and respectful to all except anyone effect by the Columbia Space Shuttle. So all of you fucking haters, have an open mind.
The funniest parts are about God and the Church! Religion poisons everything as you people are proving with your comments every day. The biggest joke however is that in the 21st century still exist people like you that believe in bad bloodthirsty fairytales of a “perfect” childlike creature with sadistic tendencies called God to watch over you. (and by that I refer to the three desert dogmas- judaism, christianity and islam) To believe= not to think with your own head.
stop being a pansy everyone, nothing is sacred, it’s funny. get over yourselves, stop being so serious. ENJOY LIFE.
This is very funny…BUT…Darwin never said humans evolved from primates. Never, ever. In addition, humans didn’t evolve from primates – primates and humans share a common ancestor, which is a massive difference. Being educated makes you funnier!
this was absolutly outstanding! how to get this idea and publishing it, really awsome except one thing, there is some religious people believe in god so they should be respected and not playing tricks or making jokes about their toughts.
peace
okay besides the Columbia joke it was all funny and I ammm a Christian and proud of it…you want to hear the funny part…most Christians have sense of humors…why…because God does…also…I’m a fledging Environmental Science:Biology major with a History Minor…You know there is room it explore in the Christian religion…don’t judge all…not all of us judge you. (for one that’s a job I leave up for God…I’m too busy enjoying life…enjoying humor to do anything else…live your life…and quit judging others…no matter what side of the coin you’re on.)
classic
Brilliant except for the Columbia set
why the hell is there a union jack with england written next to it?
this is absolutely innnapropriate. god is sacred and it is wrong to make jokes at his expense. the person who made this is probably jewish and probably doesnt care about the consequences since they dont believe in god. but even black people know that making fun of god is wrong.
I thought that this entire image was funny and was actually rather partial to the bit with the dinosaurs. That said, I think its far funnier that serious debate has ensued over minor grievances. Kudos to the artist who pulled this off.
Fail on the timestamps. The posts implicate something happening a long ass time ago, but all the responses are from within the last few hours (except for the one with God).
I don’t think that’s quite how facebook statuses work.
I want to click the ‘Older posts’ button…
Awesome! Is there a program for this, or did you just photoshop it all?
All you guys that commented on the pic about me, suck it up! I thought it was hilarious! Get off my ass you crazy wannabees!
Excellent!! had a down right chuckle at this. Well done
im with the church!!!!!
Galileo actually didn’t figure out that things revolved around the sun. that was copernicus
Props to who made this and if you’re offended… get off the internets.
OMG! TOTALLY HILARIOUS!!! I really dunno what to say BRO!
This can only be considered offensive if you have no sense of humour. You should be able to laugh at your own beliefs as well as other people’s. The God one was more offensive to the organisation of the church than the actually religion itself. Oh lord save me from your followers springs to mind.
What’s up with all the hip-hop slang being bandied about with these historical events? Hip Hop has done little of a technical nature, really.
Are you able to deliver 30 pairs of red and white seamed by 5pm friday. We have a party on…
Thanks;
JPF
Lordy People
It was the Challenger that blew up..not Columbia
*shakes head*
your right atheist these assholes are brainwashed hahaha
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OFFENSIVE TO US RELIGIOUS PEOPLE O M G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
adam and eve dont even exist hahahahahaa you all evolved from monkeys
the world isnt flat its round ish hahahaha
God does have a sense of humor. Look at mentally handicapped people and midgets. ’nuff said.
Awesome
why does everything have to be taken so seriously…
Waaaaaaaiiiiit a minute here, are you f*ckheads REALLY defending the dignity of some mythical being named “God/Jesus/Holy Spirit” over that of a prominent former U.S. PRESIDENT?????!!!
If anyone is to be angry over ANY of this, which you shouldn’t because that’s the point of a joke/humor in general, it should be about the making fun of Lincoln and not GOD. Come on guys, we live in the internet era and we know enough that JESUS didn’t die for us to live, THE F***ING DINOSAURS DID. And please nobody start saying that God put the asteroid on course to Earth because that’s bullsh*t.
I think its awesome that noone seems to be upset that the author makes fun of the church. So I guess its ok to make fun of the author, just not the star character.
Oh good, I am finally done reading the comments
great series, want more!
I liked the Julius Caesar one the best. Don’t be creepy dude LMAO
But i am very offended byt the Titanic one. You know, for me, Titanic and it’s story is a religion. So i don’t think you should be insulting someone’s religion, wether it is catholic, muslim, scientology or titanic. byt the way, dinosaurs never existed. their bones are all laid down by people who form a HUUUUGE conspiracy all over the world to bring down the Church. You know, the instance that follows Jesus by , for ages, giving ppl the choice: convert or die. Hmm, not so far away from nowadays muslims. Guess they should catch up in a few decades those 400 years they’re younger than christianity. Well, it’s normal to be harder to others than to yourself, so i cannot blame christians for weighing with two measures and weights…
Good stuff. Typical American cock-up though: that’s the British flag, not the English flag. Yes, there’s a difference
The God part was the best bit. Jees guys, harmless fun can be poked at anything. You’re on the path to being those “don’t draw the prophet in a cartoon” guys of christianity.
And anyhow, people believe in fairies. They have got just as much proof of them that you do of a God, so if you say a word against it…. you get the picture.
Very funny! XD
the funny part youre not getting…..THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS GOD!!!! so all you people that are PREACHING need to stfu!!! this is hilarious….ALL OF IT!!!
So, who is the god you speak of?
Would people ever just fu*k off, it was funny and that’s that! Gods an(unprovable)opinion and historical fact is for history books, not fake facebook jokes! It was very creative Kudos to the creators.
Oooooooh get a sense of humour you religious nutters!! These are seriously funny!!
Witqueen, what world were you living in on February 1, 2003?
*shakes head*
I thought it was all pretty funny except for the Columbia one. That one was callous and not funny at all, especially to anyone who had friends or family on that shuttle. Can’t post on FB because of that one.
Very funny, except the Challenger. And who’s to say none of this could have happened if there had been facebook, except maybe the iceburg?
@JustMe, you are an idiot for thinking @fugaisi was being serious.
Very funny. Would you please do one for The Brass Teapot? http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/group.php?gid=147327521955674&ref=mf
Meh. Read the comments first about how hilarious and offensive it was. Didn’t think it was either.
very clever. i’m still laughing. more please.
I like the asteroid part.. LOL
but it’s weird, the asteroid updated the status 65 mil years ago, but the dinosaurs commented several minutes ago. your’re too late t-rex! you are supposed to be fossils several minutes ago.. hahahaa.. who cares, it just a joke..
Oh myy. hahahhaw as laughing my ass off! i love itt! good job. hope theres more. XD
[...] the original? If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses MORE: The Roundup Humor Features Share: [...]
Brutus, dont be creepy LOLOL
This is awesome! I love it!
Smurftastic
Why is the Columbia unacceptable? Because you were alive to see it? Someone call the wambulance.
Evolution is a myth as well. Just so you know. Absolutely NO evidence to support the theory of evolution.
Quote: “Jerry was kinda right for the wrong reasons. The “creation” (copyright Judeo-Christain 3600 Bc) is mythical, not historical.”
pure genius! go on!!! ROTFLMAO
This was just gold. Like, I mean intensely EPIC.
I’m religious and I wasn’t offended by the God jokes. It’s not picking on Creationism. It’s just saying God’s thoughts during. That’s not bad, IMO. I mean, it wasn’t the funniest thing there, I chuckled a little, but I thought that Galileo & Darwin v. Church thing was hilarious. The only thing I didn’t really like was the Columbia one. First of all, it was the Challenger and second I don’t find the death of other people funny. :/ But other than that, totally awesome and nice job.
Ben Franklin never signed the Declaration of Independence. He’s probably just posing to look like the cool founding fathers.
HistoryClubVP: Dude.. For a HistoryClubVP, check out your history.. Columbia blew up in 2003, Challenger blew up in 86.. If you are going to be mad about someones post, and start claiming it’s wrong, at least research your history..
He-LARIOUS! More, plese.
make like a group for the world wars or a un group
i like the bit where god is ridiculed. you see, it’s funny because he’s not real.
Does anyone know if there’s some kind of online generator where you could make your own Facebook things like these?
I effin LOVED it!!!!!
Religious folks….go die or something
I PRAY THAT GOD FORGIVES US ALL…. AS WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE DOING///
Guys really? People are saying dont joke about god because it is offensive to religious people but guess what. Im an atheist and get offended when people TALK about god sonsidering i dont believe in him and i still laughed at this. Seriously guys get a sense of humor (people who didnt find that funny) Good job to the rest of you! This shit made me laugh my ass off. Especially john hancock’s pic
Very clever and well written.
Love pissing off those monotheistic hypocrites!!
Take your walls down and open your minds FFS!!
Would love to see more of this along the same vein…
Ed
I loved ALL of it! People are so touchy about religion, there was nothing offensive about the cracks…relax already. The Columbia exploded, it is a fact…it is not the only one though. There was nothing in here to get offended about…RELAX and enjoy the humor. Abe and the box seats….loved it
@JErry, lets face it the church has f-ed up royally. Im a christian and I admit that, no way around it.
I’m a Christian and i found the whole thing hilarious!
This page just made my day– what a great idea! “Catholic Church just posted the song We Didn’t Start The Fire”– hilarious
Just one question concerning the Ancient Asteroid: What does ‘FML’ mean?
I hate Face Book…But this is funny as Hell!!!
Not only did I love the jokes (except the Shuttle one) I loved reading all the comments. Thanks for the laughter you funny people. Most of you helped restore my faith in the future of our country. I hope all you smart people are registered to vote. It’s so easy to do.
Very funny. Even the myopically Judeo-Christian god bit. ever notice the religious people who are offended do so because deep down they doubt their faith and so get angry when someone reminds them of that doubt. People confident in their beliefs would ignore anything counter to them. Personally, I find great humor in poking fun at poorly-constructed medieval superstitions that defy science and common sense.
this is really nice done.
Very original!
Hilarious!! I loved it! ESPECIALLY the religious ones! Damn straight!
They were all funny. @Bible thumpers, pull the stick out of your ass. Oh, and God doesn’t actually exist, these facebook posts were actually done by normal people.
/sarcasm
We need more of these!
That is what i call hillarious
this is what i call dumb
the titanic one, especially unimaginative and stupid
what fun yeah
(yawns)
speaking of “unrespectable,” Human, your grammar is appalling. god did not create “Human” to be so ignorant.
To FIRSTOFTENTH, I had to ask my hip niece what FML was. It means fuc* my life. Kids these days are strange but they’re so funny, too.
You know what makes it funny…is it pokes fun at each of us who insist on providing a status of our own mundane and boring lives just so we can be seen and heard
I did find it amusing
lol that was funny as hell…. btw i love dinos and i hate the church…. im a bad man… oh nooo…. im going to hell… whis comming with me???:D
I want more!!!! These are some of the funniest things I’ve ever seen!!!
This is Kickin’ effin sweeeet!
Redcoats? More DICKcoats. Amiright?
That was awesome!!
HAHAHAH! tht god shit was funny as shit so was the lincoln shit fucking epic they need more of these
Very good! Would make a good series in a magazine or a book or something.
Hilarious and cool.
OK i dont feel like reading all the comments but did any one noticed Posted 300+ years ago but all the responses were 15-30mins ago or a day ago?
I totally agree 110% with Sam on this.
100% original. creative all the way through and very funny.
If your going to make fun of God, then you should throw in a couple more Gods. Allah, Buddha, Hades and so on. But messing with God to me is sacrilegious, I do not find it offensive just hard to read.
THE EIGHT I’D REALLY RATHER YOU DIDN’TS
1.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Act Like A Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don’t Believe In Me, That’s Okay. Really, I’m Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn’t About Them So Don’t Change The Subject.
2.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjigate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Dont Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This Through You Thick Heads: Woman=Person, Man=Person. Samey-Samey. One is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We’re Talking About Fashion And I’m Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal And Fuchsia.
4.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go F*** Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off The TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
5.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The B*******.
6.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Build MultiMillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/ Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick): A. Ending Poverty B. Curing Diseases C. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable. I Might Be A Complex Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM The Creator.
7.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Go around Telling People I Talk To you. You’re Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can’t You Take A Hint?
8.
I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses Alot Of Leather/Lubrication/Las Vegas. If The Other Person Is Into It However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear A CONDOM! Honestly It’s A Piece Of Rubber, If I Didn’t Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.
this is fantastic :]
chill out people.
That was classic!
Ugh who cares that they made a joke about god? I’m catholic and I thought it was hilarious!!! XD
I’m Muslim and found the whole God stuff funny as hell! I would love to see more of it to be honest
QQ they made a joke about my religion! It’s only okay if it’s not my religion! QQ
good stuff. but ‘Titantic’ spelling fail.
Ok. I’ll admit I’m usually kinda touchy about religious jokes. Can’t help it. But there was nothing even offensive about this. I mean, yeah, they rip on “The Church”. “The Church” is people. People screw up and do stupid things and sometimes deserve to be made fun of for it. Plus, those status comments reflect the way “The Church” actually reacted according to history.
On a lighter note.
“Don’t worry Dad. I got this.”
Awesome.
I dunno who Jerry’s God is but mine has a sense of humour. I bet He wishes he invented facebook instead of the universe, would have made more money and he could have rested after the first day.
how hilarious!!!:))
thumbs up on the Helen Keller joke. Honestly, tooooo funny.
feb 26th 2010 i started a love affair with my beautiful princess!
FUNNY! I <3 this!
=)). Cool cool =))
Columbia stuff is simply not appropriate. Abe Lincoln also questionable.
I’ve seen stuff like this before and yes, it can be quite funny, but resorting to exploiting real human tragedies is in poor taste.
I don’t understand where people get off on drawing a “line” on humor… either something is “funny” to them, or it’s not. The reason the Columbia joke isn’t funny is that it doesn’t make sense, you knuckleheads… it blew up on takeoff, not reentering the atmosphere. Sometimes things are funny to folks BECAUSE it pisses other people off. Get over it. Abe Lincoln stuff is hysterical.
you guys gotta lighten up. -_- that was HILARIOUS
little mean on the Colombia one but aside for that it was AWESOME XD
ANCIENT ASTEROID FTW
they were all very funny (part 2 ones as well) loved all of them accept Columbia…too recent and simply wrong info…make more…but please none about 9/11!
I see the guys point, but seriously people, laugh or a tear? Plus, this shit happened ages ago. When I eventually die, I’d rather have people laughing at my memory than crying over it. Shit happens, life’s a bitch and then you die, make sure you have a few laughs along the way, at anyone’s expense.
For those of you who don’t have a sense of humor, why are you even reading this? This is made for people who can appreciate anything.
jokes were awesome and creative. waiting for more…
also i don’t understand why religious people are in need of defending God. If he exists then he would have known these jokes were coming long before the world existed (You’re familiar with the “all knowing” concept, yes?). And don’t worry, these jokes wouldn’t hurt anything divine.
Funny idea but the actual wording of the updates read like they were written by a junior high school kid.
A bit more wit and a bit less immaturity would make this much better.
@Human WTF is unrespectable? I’m guessing you didn’t get past third grade, and that’s being generous.
WHO CARES!??!?!?!?! I believe in God and I didn’t find it offensive. Seriously…those of you who DONT believe take more offense from it then I did. Get over yourself.
can’t we all just get along?
right cant make fun of God! we all know that he or Jesus do not have a sense of humor! really people its a FREAKING JOKE!!!! im sure if God saw that he would be laughing!
HILARIOUS
Its just some fun, relax guys – PEACE AND LOVE ♥
Wow1
Unreal – keep going with this
- Columbus, natives, ect
- Maybe even Some Hitler and Stalin action
this. is. awesome.
It’s ETC not ECT dumbass.
Great fun in there, even loved the religion ones. Gotta have a laugh and if you cannot laugh at yourself then you need a drink
I salute the person who did this.. This is grand! Apologies to those who were offended, but c’mon.. Isn’t this funny?
Loved the Julius Caesar part!
the funny thing is with all these people claiming disrespect about the religious ones, they’re usually the ones to turn around and bash someone elses beliefs.
ps. Galileo was right, the church treated him like crap and apologized later when it was proven about 350 years later.
Loved this, so funny.
There were a few innapropriate things, but innapropriate has a tendency to be hilarious!
I think it’s hilarious that the people who are getting upset at the religous people don’t realized they’re doing the exact same thing as they are
Rev – the sophmoric humor is a jab at Facebook followers and popular culture. It’s not a lack of wit, that IS the wit. Having Great John Adams say “bring it” is too damn funny. And for the God crowd, I think the jokes are a great opportunity for human introspection and self awareness, which is what a great joke is all about, laughing at ourselves.
Epic work people…God just gave me a buzz on my mobile and he said he frikkin loved it…that settles it, the good lord approves.
God is my boyfriend…..
You should do something that shows off how STUPID people become when something messes with their religion….
Come on guys – this is AWESOME!!!!
I don’t care who ya are…that funny rite there!
Funny except for the Columbia shuttle – seven great people died trying to advance our knowledge and inspire kids to become scientists and engineers. Pretty mean to make fun of that, those people were heroes.
[...] If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses If Historical Events Had Facebook Statuses – Part 2 MORE: The Roundup Humor Features [...]
This is just plain humor…so get over yourselves! Why does everything have to be dissected. Laugh at the funny parts and ignore the parts you didn’t care for. I would love to see more of this, even a book. You could go on and on.
Brilliant, simply brilliant.
Awesome! Well done Wylo! Loved it and the second one. Can you do more?
Those were great. I’m requesting a World Trade Center one.
This was great!!! Gonna be usin it for a class project.. Coming soon to Facebook itself!!! Halarious.
nice nice!! very hillarious!
I am a Christian, and I found everything in this funny, expect for the reference to the Columbia space shuttle, which I found to be in poor taste. Simply a bad judgment call that it was included, but the “religious” stuff is funny because it reflects what the church has gone through in its history. And if the church can’t laugh at itself, then that’s a shame.
Wonderful.
Hahahaaaaaaaaaaaa funniest shit in a long time !!!!!!
@Jerry Who so butthurt? Get over it. It’s hilarious. Heck, God would think it’s hilarious too.
Awesome. Too bad there is no such thing as a Brontosaurus. It’s an Apatosaurus.
I thought that shit was hilarious. No offense taken.
GENIUS!! i havent laughed that hard for a long time!! JESUS: Dad, i got this– and “john wilkes booth likes this” has me dying lmfao!
An observation about the church that shows up in two of the posts in the article (Galileo and Darwin). In those times the Church exercised their dogma publicly, which is why we know these men whose freethinking views were controversial. Today, the same dogma (forget the church but considering others) is not manifested publicly but in duplicitous manners, which not only stale progress, as the Church did in those days, but indecently victimize the same types of people. The same types of freethinking people who moved the world ahead as needed, Galileo and Darwin, to name only two. To try to say anything to the contrary, identifies one speaking as the dogmatic close-minded type who prevents needed change. Oh, but that’s why they probably don’t speak publicly. Everyone would see their ineptness.
Don’t worry guys, I thought it was class.
everything was hilarious although i do think the columbia joke was a bit too much. those people didnt think it was funny they were about to die. nonetheless good job you should make a book.
The only thing that was wrong with the Columbia joke is that it exploded LEAVING the earth, not reentering the earth’s atmosphere.
Now if Hitler had status updates…those might be offensive. Just a tad.
Unless it was “Nein! Nein! Nein! I’m getting sick of this damn bunker. Fucking commies.”
The only thing that was wrong with that statement is that the Challenger exploded leaving the Earth. Columbia disintegrated reentering the atmosphere.
Read it again dude, “entering back into earth’s atmosphere the homecoming party’s gonna be awesome.
—loved the Church parts.
Great list. Ha!
Too damn funny.
i love the cockroaches.
…there’s no such thing as a Brontosaurus? Here when I thought I knew my dino names! ha.
ha i like how i pressed older posts thinking there would be more
FUCK YEAH!@!
can you do the same with fictional characters? “it’s a trap”. got the quote? (giant squidhead)
How can I contact the person who wrote this, and tell them that I think these are HILARIOUS and as a history teacher I want to know how to make them so I can have my students make them for assignments. I agree I’m not that into the sad ones, but the Noah’s Ark OMG amiright. aiiii….
Also, instead of cockroach at the end of the meteor status, probably should’ve been a rat, a mouse, or some small rodent.
Uhhh the reason that it said roaches is that scientifically they would be the only living thing to survive if an atom bomb destroyed the Earth. Didn’t anyone see the scientific angle to the religious joking? I find THAT very funny!! LOL
Oh my sheeeesshhh, this is entirely tooooo funny, like I saw it earlier today then i had to look at it again ! (: haaaa woooooww
But he’s not really making fun of god!! its not excatly wat happend but still adam and eve made sin and jesus fixed it
Ok, I’m an Athiest, but I’ll step over the line and argue a few facts for you “religious” people. Your “God” created everything, yes? Wouldn’t that mean that he also created “Humor”? Oh, why yes it would! Also, how is that disrespectful? The only thing God said was “Can’t teach these kids anything”, it wasn’t like they had him swearing excessively in there right?
Get a life bible thumpers, get your heads out of your ass.
HEY LEAVE US ALONE I LOVE THE BIBLE AND GOD
oh, wait, no i don’t.
all you people complaining about the god jokes and that really should grow up, they weren’t even offensive!
they were all fact!
funny stuff, but when I got to Columbia Space Shuttle I had a really grim feeling, still I have to give you credits for making even sinister jokes quite funny. As for the God part the most hilarious thing I find in it, it’s the part where the Church likes the Original Sin.
What software was used to make this, i want to do one.
alli have to ssay is that all you silly christians are the equivilant to closeted homosexuals. Run and tell dat ! Home boy!
If I have to see this stupid fucking thing one more time…
Mira
haha dick coats, we have them!
I thought all of them were funny except the Columbia one … and guess what I am a Christian, the God one’s those were funny. My historical status would be something along the lines of : decided to cut my ear off today, it just didn’t feel right.
anyone who thinks any part of this isnt humerous needs to lighten up!
i see lots offended by the space shuttle, but no one offended by the Titanic huh? many many MANY more died in that catastrophe……
That said, again, lighten up if this offends you
I notice an interesting parallel:
Those that take offense to the referred “God Jokes” and the attitude of “The Church”.
Oh boy, the things that make ya go “Hmmmm…”
Take it for what it IS people, don’t make it what it AIN’T …
Cuz sometimes … it just REALLY AIN’T.
Ignorance is NOT bliss, it’s naivety.
The harder you make it to learn your mistakes the easier it is to teach your mistakes … and THAT! kids, is why the world is sooo F’d up!
LOL 8-]
MOOOOOOOOOOOORE
This was hilarious, and from a very religious person, I am sure God has a sense of humor too. I am sure he would laugh. He created all including humor.
Yeeeeeeaaaaaahhhh . . . last I checked, God had a sense of humor, unless you think Darwin is partially right and that quality just evolved in some people? Clearly not in you? God+funny doesn’t=heresy. I happen to think it’s funny AND accurate, if you read it again with your head on your shoulders this time you might agree . . . I highly doubt God would take offense to that little joke . . .
Relax dudes…God jokes are funny. I agree the man up there has a sense of humour too
But I have to admit that Christians have a pretty good reason to be upset. It just seems that nowadays , in the field of monotheistic religions, everyone can poke fun (even to the offensive extremes) about the Judeo-Christian God, but if the joke was about the Muslims or Islam, it would be immediately taken down and a formal apology would have to be issued.
Such double standards. Tsk. If you want to offend one, why can’t you offend the other? What’s the point in crying for peace and religious equality if by that definition it means a bashing of someone else’s beliefs?
That being said, I think the reason the author only focused on the Christian/Jewish God was because it’s coming from a Western perspective. If it came from Russia, there would be Stalin/Communist jokes; and if it came from China, there would be Confucius/Tang Dynasty jokes, etc.
Comedy has a great potential for unifying everyone. Seriously, the world would be a better place if more people had a sense of humour.
Just my two cents.
Lollercopter ! Too funny all of it.
And to everyone who takes offence to the god stuff need I remind you … ” If thine eye offends thee, pluck it out! “
Loved it! Definitely would love to see more!!
AWESOME STUFF!!! LOL!!! Keep em’ comin!!!
OMG! I laughed hysterically! As someone who majored in history, this was just over the top hilarious with the innuendos!
And I agree… the John Hancock picture had me rolling!
Please give us more! This is quite possibly funnier than FU Penguin!
I’m a Christian and the only offensive thing I found was the Columbia bit.
On the other hand, I LOVED that Copernicus “liked” Galileo’s status. Hilarious!
“And I do believe that God likes humor….sorry, but I don’t think he wants us to be sulking around Earth for our lives having no fun”
No – That’s the Catholics
HAHA i lole’d
the whole world needs a enama !!!!!!!!!!!!!lmassoff!!!
scotty beam up ..lolol
Let’s just relax and laugh at a joke… No arguing about beliefs, it’s a losing battle and no one will change their mind.
keep it going & publish it ………”rap humor”
Don’t tune me! I will send you to hell, you heathens.
Bow down to me and me only. Do as I say, not as I do. Everyone who commented here is destined for a lifetime of unhappiness.
Sincerely
God
I love how this just shows our history is a history of men.
Loved them all
This was hilarious. I am Christian and I thought the God part, especially the part about buddy Jesus having this one(original sin) was the best. It was respectful, theologically accurate and ROFL funny. Please all of the politically correct vegetables getting offended for other people shut it. You give other groups that don’t have a stick up there butts like you do a bad name.
Eh, mildly funny… I am a Christian and I did not find the God jokes offensive, just not incredibly witty. I think they could’ve done a lot better with such a goldmine of material. The Colbert Report and Daily Show are ten times funnier. Not being a hater, just keepin’ it real. And to all fellow religious practitioners, I think it’s important to have a sense of humor even about the so-called “sacrosanct”. After all, nowhere in the Bible does it say that God didn’t have a sense of humor…
The Julius Caesar one was pretty funny, but the rest were only mildly amusing. I am a Christian and I did not find the God jokes offensive at all; they just weren’t incredibly witty either. I think they could’ve done a lot better with such a goldmine of material. The Colbert Report and Daily Show are ten times funnier. Not being a hater, just keepin’ it real. On a separate note, to all fellow religious practitioners out there, I think it’s important to have a sense of humor even about that which we regard as sacrosanct. After all, nowhere in the Bible does it say that God doesn’t have a sense of humor. The ability to offend is granted by the offended. Plain and simple.
Too soon for the Columbia disaster.
Knocking God and religion? Right on!
People that take their religion (any religion) THAT seriously are part of the problem, not part of the solution.
This made my day! Stfu about religion no one cares. It’s funny get over it.
The Pioneers are at the Snake River crossing on the Oregon Trail.
Indian: Need a hand?
Zeke: Nah, we can totally ford the river.
Oxen: mmmmoooooooOOOOOOOO?????!!
Oxen and Zeke have drown.
Mary is attending “Zeke and Oxen memorial service”.
OMG GUYZZZZ LETS GO BURN KORANZZZZ!!! just kidding.
eat my socks you hypocrites. and get a sense of humor while you’re at it. and stop being jerks. You think you own the world. get a life and go away if you don’t like it. and stop ruining jokes that some people actually enjoy. oh yea, I forgot that you OWNED THE WORLD AND NO ONE ELSE MATTERS BUT YOUR PETTY RELIGION.
oh yea and to the Catholics that aren’t extremists and hypocrites, I LOVE YOU. You haven’t ruined religion through ignorance, and you have good senses of humor too. =D Peace out and keep on laughing!
@Wiggidy, you’re a son of a bitch you know that??
chill out guys about the god thing.
The attacks on the Church are historically inaccurate. The Catholic Church is not full of homosexuals, for one. And while they disagreed with Galileo, they did so because a good portion of the world and their rulers did too. It was a new discovery. Lastly, Darwin’s theory is just that- still isn’t proved. The Church rightly disagrees with this because there is no scientific evidence to prove it as a fact. The Church proclaims that science comes from God and is good. Evolution, just like global warming theory, isn’t science.
The space shuttle joke was bad too. Wasn’t funny in the least.
@bigblue actually, there is substantial proof that evolution is fact. google search it. not difficult. also, still isn’t PROVEN, not proved.
I’ve been a Christian all my life (except, some might consider, when I reevaluated my beliefs several times and sort of “became” an atheist for a bit, but ultimately decided that the empirical extrabiblical evidence for God clearly and blatantly overwhelmed the evidence and arguments against it, though it is arguable about whether, from a Christian viewpoint, someone can be a Christian and then become “unsaved”) and I thought all of the jokes were hilarious, especially the God ones. I have always considered myself a bit abnormal because I am amused by antichristian material (like nonstampcollector and darkmatter), but that’s just the way that God made me imo.
You religious freaks need to lighten the hell up. If you can’t laugh about religion then you’re way too anal and in dire need of a colonic.
BigBlue – if you believe the Church threatened an 80 year old Galileo with torture because other people thought the universe revolved around us you must not know much about the RCC & their dark ages.
Oh! And there it is! You know ZERO about science too! Look up the word theory and read ALL the definitions, not just the first one. There is a “theory of gravity” too but few of the same zealots pretend it is unproven. There is ample evidence of evolution.
You are right about the RCC not being full of Homosexuals though – priests have raped little girls, and a few have even violated grown up ones.
Actually, the Church ordered Gallileo to house arrest for the rest of his life, this meant that food and supplies were sent to a house outside of the city, where he could complete his studies, observations, and experiments until the day he died (which was about three of four years)
I am a Christian, and I think the God jokes were funny. =)
This was funny ill admit, but you see how ignorant people are through about 90% of these comments
9/11!!! 9/11!!! :p
May I recommend you religious-heads some George Carlin material? Funny stuff though xD. Love the meteor one.
Too bad there isn’t a button on SU that says: [I LOVE THIS!!!!].
Most inventive thing I’ve seen yet… I plan on sharing/forwarding this to as many pesky creationists that I can think of!
This is crazy staff LOL
You’re all idiots. This is hilarious!
this needs to be in the classroom. seriously. its sad, but the kids would get it and be interested in history.
btw i laughed the entire thing. i think the God stuff was pushed a little, but still funny. it didnt denounce him just made light of it. people, dont take things so seriously. If you believe in God than pray for the peoples salvation and move on. What is the good in going nuts on a thing online?
You had me until “6000 years ago”
Im a christian and I liked all the jokes its funny its humor and the columbia thing well its funny but the american ego goes aflamin when you see one of your mayor failures and the douche who said religion flies you in to a building but science flies you to the moon i lough at your attempt on being smart but the religion is more believable than the moon landing stupid american -.-
The Columbia one bothered me a tiny bit, but I’m old enough to remember seeing the Challenger blow up. Under the event, Original Sin, Jesus’ comment is “I got this one.” Wow folks, take away the sarcasm and you have the core belief of Christianity. So I’m not gonna cry “foul.” (Not that I would anyway.)
Funny until Challenger. That was in extremely poor taste given the families of these people are still alive.
And Marcio, you are a dick!
Lol, people complaining about god jokes, here’s a good one.
2 guys walk into a bar, and one of them was God, and he was like, “hey bro, wassup?” and I was like “I’m out” and then I went and raped his Mum olololol.
except for the columbia space shuttle..very funny
Very funny-I shall be ripping this off,I mean paying homage or doing a tribute.I’m a gospel wallopper and I liked the God comments.You yanks are supposed to be having a global bash at religious absolutism in the wider world but for most of you you don’t have to leave the street you live in
Seriously this is AWESOME! Whoever did this did a grt job!
& if you’re going to take exception with the Challenger bit, you should also take exception with the Vesuvius, Titanic and the Native American (Thanksgiving & Cortez)… These are just jokes… lighten up!
The God jokes are also GREAT! Seriously, you’re worried about getting in trouble with God?? What does that even mean??
God doesn’t have an ego!
Ok, the Hellen Keller bit was kinda messed up, but funny!
there is no such thing as a brontosaurus. look it up.
facebook & twitter sucks
JFK: Dallas is beautiful this time of year, I think we’ll take the convertible….
Oswald: Yeah, take in the sun and drive slow it’s good for scanning the crowd for chicks
Challenger: Kind of rough on the lift off kids, better put the ‘no smoking’ light on
Sally Ride: Hey, what’s this red button do?????
Houston: DON’T PU……dammit. Well, there’s always the Columbia…….
John Lennon: I’d love to sign you book. Yoko get the hell out of the way I have fans you know.
Chapman: Sorry America I only had 6 bullets and that Yoko was a quick little monkey!
HAHAHAHHAHAAH
haha. BRONTOSAURUS’S EXISTED,fuck you einstien.
p.s. you spelled your name wrong.
ooh i don’t have to register to comment!
Yeah ur all dumb-fucs
I’ve never so hard in my life!
God please forgive me.
Haha! Hilarious! XD
That shit is funny!
THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WORKING ON A SPEECH PROJECT THIS IS WHAT I FOUND LOL WOW…………..
Now thats what i call a history lesson lol LMAO!!!
Fake and Gay!
this was hilarious.
lovelovelove. :3
I knew that once people were saying that the “God jokes” were offensive, that some lame atheist would come around and start up an argument. I swear, that’s all they do. Atheists just sit at their monitors and unload on Christians because they actually choose to live life to the fullest…gets me every time.
I’m a Christian and I found the God jokes to be funny, but I still hold the same respect for my God. I don’t think God would’ve given us senses of humor if He didn’t have one Himself since He created us in His image. Just sayin. Nice one. I thought the whole thing was pretty neat. Funny and Cute because everyone is Facebook crazed.
@Human: unrespectable is not a word -_-
I LOVE God with all my heart, but this sh** was hilarious! I pray and I attend chruch but I really don’t find this offensive. I don’t see myself as any less christian-catholic because I laugh at this every single time i see it, hah.. What the hell, God would probably laugh at it himself.. “those funny little human beings, man i did a good job..” But hey, I get where people are coming from and if somebody finds those comments offensive, then they do, and there is nothing we can say to change that. Everybody looks differently at things and someone might be more sensitive when it comes to religion, respect that.. But anyways, whoever did this is funny as f***!!!! good job!! hahha
Fantastic. had me in stitches. Sad it was so short would really make a great book. however reading all the comments from the people offended by the religious comments is equally amusing!
hahahahah “unrespectable” classic… and im a christian too and i thought all of the posts were great, being christian has nothing to do w it. yall are just up tight… get a sense of humor and stop crying bc ppl make fun of us
lmao. this is great.
is that supposed 2 b funy? all i saw was swering and insulting religious people (me). sorry 2 bring the party down but i didnt lik it.
The absolute funniest thing I’ve seen in a while – This made my day!
whatev
“I knew that once people were saying that the “God jokes” were offensive, that some lame atheist would come around and start up an argument. I swear, that’s all they do. Atheists just sit at their monitors and unload on Christians because they actually choose to live life to the fullest…gets me every time.”
Yep. Christians sure do live their lives to the fullest. They have no restrictions or rules or anything to live with, or anything like that. No sir. Nope. There’s nobody telling them to live a certain way or burn in Hell for the rest of eternity. Nuh-uh. Not at all.
I’m Christian and I thought the god part was hilarious, lol. The Colombia thing, too soon.
I thought this was heelarious! Even if us Christians aren’t known for our stellar sense of humour… Sad day. And since God created this whole “sense of humour” thingamajig, you’d think we’d be embracing it a bit more.
I felt more guilty about laughing at the Columbia one then about the church or God ones. And personally, I felt like the insults were actually aimed more at the church than God anyways. It’s funny! Laugh! Or at least suck it up and don’t complain about it.
really great stuff – don’t make a religion discusion. have a smile and love the life