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We don’t care if this is an April Fools’ Day prank, Think Geek, we want you to put down your Dr. Who Umbrella TV Remote and make these damn things. Think Geek gave every kid’s favorite quasi-adult vehicle the Mad Max treatment for April 1, and, while we’re grown men, we really, really want one. Power Wheels Desert Drifters feature all the spikes, spears, and weapons that the dystopian vehicles in the movies have, and they even have storage area for survival gear, a MFP-Lock Braking System, and a top speed of 7.5 mph … if they actually existed, of course. So we urge all you children to get some sort of crayoned petition together so these can become a reality.

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You don’t need to be an international man of mystery for there to be value in the ability to pick a lock. Whether you have a penchant for forgetting your keys or just want to be there for friends and neighbors, learning to pick locks is a worthwhile skill. But that doesn’t mean you should go practicing on your front door; officers might not like that. Instead, get yourself this Lock Pick Training Kit, which includes a set of tools and a see-through padlock so you can watch what’s happening while you practice.