Girls Gone Wild Syndrome

By Ben Dahl

Twelve years ago, a new epidemic began to show it’s ugly face (and perfect ten breasts) all across the United States – and it’s all thanks to Joe Francis (he might be a douche, but he did for public peepshows what Ford did for cars).

Girls Gone Wild Syndrome is a very real condition and affects women who have been to events like Mardi Gras and Spring Break and women who have to live with GGWS are advised to stay away from places like Senor Froggies… and Mexico.

Even GGWS therapy sessions don’t seem to be able to totally cure the syndrome because as soon as the $0.07 beads come out, the shirts come off. Even in the face of failure, the GGW Clinic in Sarasota Springs, NY continues to do their part to prevent this terrible syndrome from becoming the next avian flu.