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We’ve never been the type of people to prevent someone from starting their happy hour a few hours early, but we’re not the type of people signing your paycheck either. If you need a piece of hardware capable of poppin’ bottles and staying under the radar—all the while looking good—look no further than these cold rolled steel bottle openers from J.L. Lawson & Co. Simple, understated and hand machined in the U.S.A., both The Original keychain opener and the Incognito necklace will seriously improve your bottle opening abilities.

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Ah, the waffle weave. Looks cool, feels great, reminds us of toasted Eggos. You’ve seen them before–probably in a fancy store or hotel–but Parachute’s brand new Waffle Towels are different. They’re spun using innovative Aerocotton Technology, which basically means they’ll be dry by the time your significant other finally gets out of the shower and realizes you stole their towel. Parachute’s Waffle Towels come in two sizes and two neutral colors. Plus, their 100% cotton construction means they start soft and only get softer with time. Even Kevin McCallister would approve.